God's Comic

God's Comic

The Dilemma of the Green Geek

One question, if I “go green” does that also mean I also have to lose my dignity? I was driving today on the freeway and saw a car next to me called the “Cube”. At first I felt sorry for the driver as I assumed there was a circus in town and the clown car got confused, left the tent, and ended up on the freeway. Then I came to a startling and disturbing realization. The person behind the wheel wasn’t a clown at all but a guy going to work! In other words he bought this car…ON PURPOSE!! I’m sorry folk’s and granted it’s not like I’m some connoisseur of esthetic lines or anything but no matter what you do, driving in a cube is never going to look cool. How did these earth worshippers ever settle on the cube design anyways? It seems counter intuitive to their cause. They love the earth right, and I mean LOVE the earth in an oddly unsettling kind of dare I say ‘incestuous” kind of way. So if that’s the case why didn’t they make their first earth car in the shape of a globe? At least then the rest of us, you know, the normal folks would have some kind of clue what they were shooting for? Then you could have it decorated in a cute kind of way that would make us smile and be less likely to laugh at this idiotically ugly monstrosity your traveling in. Maybe it could have three holes painted on it so it would give the illusion that you’re in a giant bowling ball and the rest of us better stay clear. Plus when you merge it would give the appearance of you trying to pick up a split! That would actually be fun for all of us and make the morning commute more festive. Unfortunately when you are a cube the best you can look like is a dice which by the way is probably fairly accurate since you are gambling with your life when it comes to surviving an accident in your Tonka toy with an engine and if you ever are hit by another car you are defiantly going to crap out.
This does demonstrate however that whenever a “green” fanatic puts together something to “help the environment”, you can pretty much count on the fact that the one thing it will absolutely help is the ability for the rest of us to have something to laugh about. Silly green people and their cubed cars☺!

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posted April 12, 2011 at 6:55 pm

As I was driving to work this morning, I was almost rear-ended by an impatient mother-earth-loving-head-up-their-rearend-prius-driving idiot… I called these people Pridiots. (Feel free to use that)


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posted April 25, 2011 at 7:52 pm

They could go with the “half globe” look and drive in a vw bug! Did you notice if the driver in the cube car was eating crackers, since they look like cracker boxes??

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