When Adam and Eve fell from grace after eating
from the tree of good and evil, one of the “evil” things they came to realize
was they were naked.

I don’t know exactly why being naked with your
wife while being the only humans on earth would be considered evil?

It seems to me it should have been considered
exactly how it felt prior to the
apple…GOOD!

 I
can’t speak for women, but for a man to get to wander around outside nude
surrounded by beautiful trees and sky and, oh yeah, a naked lady, would still
be paradise in my book.

Men love the outdoors and being naked while
there is simply a bonus. Nothing and I mean nothing makes a man feel more like
a man than peeing outside.

So, the shame that came with nakedness must have
been the beginning of the shyness that comes with others seeing us naked. That “other” being God at the time would
make it even more traumatic since apparently he didn’t want us to “know” we
were nude.

But it seems to me that takes all the fun out of
it. If prior to the apple incident, seeing my wife naked wasn’t exciting, it
defeats the purpose of being nude, which as I already said is one of men’s
favorite scenarios.

God knew they were nude but wondered how they
found out which could only mean that once they did they would feel less
comfortable sharing that nudeness with God which is still strange since he made
them that way and obviously never felt awkward being around them prior to that.

This fear of nudeness to strangers seems to be
common now amongst most civilization’s though there are tribes in south America
and Africa that walk around nude or partially so and apparently aren’t ashamed of
it.

Even though some of the nude people are 70 year
old men and women; which if you’ve had a chance to see them in all their senior
anatomical splendor, would cause me, if I was chief, to make my first decree “The
gods have spoken to the learned ones in a dream and now demand the sacred
elderly to wear some kind of holy bra and loincloth otherwise we will have no
choice but to gouge out our own eyes”.

The only time people in western culture are nude in front of a stranger without fear of
being arrested is doctor’s visits. Though after the fall aside from being
embarrassed at being nude, we as a group are also now going to get sick once in
awhile and need to be closely examined preferably
by someone we don’t know whose only qualification is they have a stethoscope.

We have all been trained that when a stranger
with a stethoscope asks you to remove your clothes we’ll do it.

As a guy part of that consequence, by the way, is to have this unknown assailant,
professional though he may be, physically grab, knead, and or examine our
manhood from bough to stern while we get to make coughing noises since having
your privates groped by a strange man wasn’t as humiliating as it needed to be for
500 bucks a shot so why not make us bark too. Just gives them more funny
stories to share at the lunchroom.

So all I’m saying is when God asks you not to
eat from a particular tree…your best bet is to take heed or it could lead to doctor’s
visits, which, as we discovered can be disturbing.

 That
is unless having a strange man with a degree touching your junk isn’t
disturbing to you…and by the     way, if it isn’t …you need prayer.

More from Beliefnet and our partners
Close Ad