Fresh Living

Fresh Living


How Are You Making Today More Positive?

posted by vreiss

happyonbeach.jpgI love that question. It started with a friend of mine. We had recently been talking about the Law of Attraction and keeping our minds clear of unnecessary negativity so a more fluid flow of goodness could come out of us and enter us. Say what you will about the Law of Attraction, and especially “The Secret” (and I have said a lot–see my essay on the the Law of Attraction and “The Secret“), but I’ve found staying non-polyannically positive really does make my life better.

So one day I was definitely not in my happy place, grousing about something or the other to my friend, and she asked, “How are you making today more positive?” It stopped my cranky brain in its looping tracks of doom. Um, huh. Even considering the question started to shift me, re-orienting my whole perspective. And studies back this up–we actually re-wire our brain when we change how we think.

Me, today, I’m wildly behind in a scared, I’m drowning and I suck sort of way. So my positive thing is going to be ticking off three important things on my to-do list. But on Monday, I bought myself daisies.

I lob it to you, and will continue to do so: What are you doing to make today more positive?



  • http://blog.beliefnet.com/freshiving Holly

    Love the question – and I really need it today. I woke up late after a horrid nightmare (the kind that has chapters…) and feel groggy, unmotivated, and generally blah. So. To make my day more positive, I am am going to go stand on my porch right now and take 10 breaths of cold, clean air. Later today, I will return an overdue phone call to a friend.

  • Valerie

    That sounds lovely!

  • http://tinychoices.com Jenn

    What an awesome question! :)
    This morning I ran back onto the subway car I’d just exited, to give a guy back the glove he’d dropped onto the platform. I was happy to return the glove to its owner, because losing a single glove is one of the saddest things ever. So, that helped to make today more positive!
    Also, masala chai makes everything more positive.

  • http://www.happinessoverhaul.com jessica

    I will hang this question on our fridge! Love it.
    Sometimes I blast happy music to make me feel better.
    Sometimes I eat chocolate, but that never really works.
    Sometimes I force myself to write down 10 things I am grateful for.
    Sometimes the simple act of changing your outfit and wear something festive for no reason can brighten up my day. Guaranteed that people will say “you look nice(r)” and sometimes an ego boost is all I need.
    Today is not a good day for me. Actually, it has been a crappy week altogether. So I decided that I will finish my vision board. That really is a good way to change your vibrations!
    Great post!

  • Claudia

    Today, I will stop just thinking about taking the dogs for a walk and DO IT!

  • Your Name

    i am helping a friend out looking after her 1 year old kids.
    stephanie

  • KATHY

    TODAY I HAVE DECIDED TO STOP CRYING AND FEELING BAD FOR SOMEONE WHO DOESNT CARE ABOUT ME.

  • swanlake

    Great article. Reminded me once again that in order to have a happy full filling life, i have to want it and that will only happen if i brush away the cobwebs of despair and focus on what i want rather than what i dont want. law of attraction is based on the theory that we shouldnt worry so much on how something will happen but rather divert that energy on envisioning it happening. wishing all happy and positive thoughts.

  • Cindy

    Today is my 54th birthday – Yikes! but I remembered what my 98 yr old grandmother always told us right up to the day she passed –
    “It’s only a number” Remembering this made my day a positive day!

  • http://blog.beliefnet.com/freshiving Holly

    Happy birthday, Cindy! May you be passing along your grandmother’s wisdom when you are 98 years old!
    Kathy, good for you for that decision. Hope it helped you today.
    Jessica, I love the idea of changing your outfit as a way to change your mood!

  • Lynn

    I called the employee assistance line and admitted to feeling suicidal.

  • Nicole

    I ate Ethopian food and laughed with my friends. Thanks for the great question!

  • Michelle

    Thanks for the article. It’s a great question, and I’ve put it on a post-it on my computer at work. It will remind me that the power to have a good day stops with ME, not with those (crazy people) around me. I recently re-found a necklace with a little silver charm of a basket, and have worn it all week, trying to remember that I am an empty vessel for God’s work. Takes a lot of pressure off of ME to always know what the next right thing to do is.

  • http://blog.beliefnet.com/freshliving/ Valerie Reiss

    Thanks, all for your great ideas. Lynn, please let us know if we can connect you to any other resources, though it sounds like you’re taking care of yourself. But we worry.

  • Robie

    I am very stuck today in my negativity. I can’t seem to pull myself out. Unemployed, ridden with guilt from recent bad decisions, I feel like I have done nothing today to move back into the positive. Though I have tried, (I applied for 3 jobs), I just won’t allow myself to believe it. I haven’t even made it out of my pajamas. :(

  • Anna

    Hang in there Robie, I too was recently unemployed but now I working @ a temporary job but it may turn permanent, God is good. I had to learn to be patience and that’s something that I’m not very good at. Just think positive thoughts and visualize the things that you won’t to come into your life. Believe and have faith and it will happen for you too.

  • Your Name

    I needed to read this article and blog. (I know I’ll be reading it again.) I am caught in the anger loop with my silent husband. I have been for quite a while. There’s just so much positive that deserves my attention. I usually manage to combine both the negative and the positive in my day, but I wouldn’t call that balance. What will I do to make the day more positive? Respond to this blog, be on a great conference call this afternoon, journal instead of talk, clean the bathroom and declutter, work on a book I’m helping edit, look at the photos of the grandchildren online, and more! And, oh, yes, I eliminated some negative words from the description of my husband above. I’m not likely to visualize him as loving because I know better, but I can visualize myself with loving and courteous friends and other people.

  • Your Name

    The question is, do u want to be happy today? if the answer is yes so find ways to make it happen. I work with mentaly ill, elderly and recovery groups. The question that I ask first thing in the morning is: What are you gratful for today?…., if they could come up with list of gratitudes and try to stay positive, I think, It is a lot easier for the rest of us. Be kind to yourself and others, have faith and trust that universe will take care of you if you are connected to the source of goodness.

  • Your Name

    I try not to pick up the newspaper or listen to the news I think if people would just go on livining life & not listen to the neg. things everyone would be a lot better off!! DO NOT LISTEN TO THE NEWS MEDIA!!!!

  • http://www.pastfirst.com pastfirst

    We have to remember to ask ourselves this question EVERYDAY.
    Actually, I’m going through a positive phase so I’m happy.
    Today I love myself. I love my kids. I like my job. I love my partner.
    When I’m down, I think of the positive things in my life. It always helps and we always have positive things to be thankful for.

  • Your Name

    I’m trying hard every day to remember this concept. It’s difficult when people around you are not in this mindset but it does help me in the darkest of my moods.

  • Jeannette

    what a great question! Thank you for asking. I will go to church, I will be others focused, and I will believe that abundance is my birthright because God only wants the best for me. Here is one small, abundantly concise point you can remember: if it’s not positive, it’s negative. That one always helps me reframe what it is I’m thinking about. Also, like in The Secret, if it doesn’t make you feel GOOD when you think it, it’s likely bad for you (and if it’s bad, it’s not good, which is to say, negative!).

  • Your Name

    Lynn,
    I said a prayer for you. Please try to turn your negative toughts into positive ones. May God bless and keep you.

  • faith

    I work in a hospital on the oncology unit, and try my very best to be a blessing to the patients.
    It does not take much to make a difference in someone who is dying.
    A kind word, a prayer, an offer to do something for them. These things mean so much to them.
    God had placed me on that particular unit for a reason, and I will use the gifts He has given me to bring a smile, or some hope, to someone who is in need of it.

  • Tom D

    Rememeber to remember. It’s the only way to stay “in check”

  • Your Name

    Most days I live in the negative and I mean really in the negative. I try to find something that I can be positive about every day but I can’t. I hav had 5 major back surgeries and continue to struggle every day just to do anything because even though I have had the surgeries my back is still in constant pain (my last back surgery was in 2007) I have also had a full knee replacement surgery in 2008, and I am still struglling to get that knee to work with out any pain. I have a whole host of other medical problems going on for me right now and it is hard to stay positive at all. I live every day in pain and the medications that they give me for pain just don’t last long enough. To add to all of that my only child, my son who is 30 years old now is not talking to me and has not been talking to me for more than a year all over some stupid disagreement we had. I spend most of my days in bed in pain and depressed. So am I positive today, no and usually not ever even though my boy freind tries every day to make me laugh and smile

  • Tanya

    How does a person believe that God wants us to be happy and wants only the best for us when horrible things happen to people? I know positive thinking is important, but where does a God figure come into it?
    S/he allowed people to die in the gas chambers of Auschwitz and allowed people to be massacred in a church in Rwanda. I don’t think that makes people happy or that’s what is “best” for them.

  • Your Name

    Back Pain-I know exactly what you are talking about.I am in kind of the same situation.And I can sympathize with the lying in bed depressed and in pain.Don’t take your boyfriend for granted though,I have 3 small children and they do not understand what I am going thru,and my fiance is not the most personable or positive person.I get little emotional support from him.I know the struggle everyday you face.I try to believe that my friends and family understand me,but they are just helpless in knowing what to do to help.I am currently trying the mind over pain method.No matter how bad it hurts I try to smile and do things for me like make-up,hair,nails,bubble bath,anything to pamper myself.As a mom,I am sure you put everyone else first in your life for too long.Now is time for spirituality and me-time.Good luck!

  • Maggie

    Prayer is a powerful tool for staying positive — the mere act of asking for help in coping with life is an admission that I am not doing this alone. Whenever I pray for help in the mornings — and I try to do it every day — I feel a surge of positive energy go through my body. Another tool I use is mentally starting my day over again when something negative happens, or my attitude starts veering towards the negative.

  • Your Name

    Nobody will deny that there are painful experiences in life, and for some there is much more pain than for others. There is real suffering in our human experience and we can feel it for ourselves and for others. However, blaming God for the pain we experience does not serve us.
    We are free to use the laws of spirit and the laws of nature anyway we want and we can use it to increase joy and happiness for us and others or we can use it to create painful experiences for ourselves and others. If we demanded that a Power intervened when we made painful choices, would that be freedom? If this God stepped in to prevent painful experiences, how far would you want this to go? What would your freedom be like if you never felt what a hot skillet was like? Would it be better to never feel the slap of dogs tail as it whips wildly when you walk in the door and see your dog-friend after a day away?
    I realize these small pains are much different from the catastrophic man-made and nature-made events we have seen and the suffereing is much greater. And…I don’t want to minimize the pain that so many have endured because of these bad choices of others. To me it is excruciating pain when i watch a loved one suffer whether is is physical pain, emotional suffering or spiritual confusion.
    My point is that we are either free to make choices or we are not and because we are free to make choices with that freedom comes the option to create happy, joyful experinces or painful ones. If our God, however we see God, intervened on some choices, where would that stop? And, we do not see the bigger picture for even ourselves, much less other people. If you beleive in any existance beyond this life, then there is a much larger picture for each of us. And I don’t know what my bigger picture looks like, much less that of anyone else.

  • Cat

    I myself have recently had back surgery. I went from working two jobs to absolute stagnation. Frustrated, bored, depressed I decided to do heavy duty soul searching. I have 3 teenagers who weren’t sure how or what to do for me – an alleged boyfriend who unless it has to do with him is non-compassionate I cried and cried and cried till I realized everybody around me had great advice and sympathy – but was not in my mind and body – So I had to help myself. I enrolled in School online – if I was going to be “locked” up in my own home in agonizing pain and distress I might as well make use if it. I go to school – rest when necessary – sleep when need be – but the greatest gift of all is in realizing that after all is said and done and recovery is over I’ll have a degree and will be able to pursue other avenues of my life. I won’t be able to work to jobs anymore but with my degree I won’t need to. I do believe God put me down for a reason – and my life needed a change – so now that the procrastination of it done I’m on my way. I don’t know your situations – but I can say this now – reach deep down inside and find yourself again – throw away the past don’t worry about the people around, you it’s there loss that there not in your life.

  • Your Name

    Tanya~ these just my thoughts for what they worth: God/s want us to be happy but we hav free will too. And our paths go as they should. Problems oome when we try to judge others and what they are doing or what is going on in their lifes. Bad things happen yes but in order for the soul to grow and advance bad things must happen. Other wise the soul would be stuck in 1 place for ever. God/s come into this because of unconditional love. They offer hope, and place to lay burdens to make our life easier to walk on this earth in bodies not meant to last forever. He/she comes into this because without him/her/them we’d not be heer to begin with. May be a way to look at self and others is to think : We are spiritual beings having a physical experence NOT we are physical beings having a spiritual experience. When you turn it.. your eyes open up real wide real fast.
    Again just my thoughts for you. Hope they help.
    BB
    Purpleshadow
    Becky

  • Nikki Quismondo

    I’ve thought about the question of happiness for a long time.
    Everyone has certain freedoms, and in essence, we may be chasing freedoms that others have or someone may be trying to chase ours…
    If I wanted to be truly happy, then it shouldn’t require the dependence of thinking of how someone else can make it happen for me…
    so I created a list and anyone is welcome to use it:
    Happiness list:
    1. find a good inspirational quote- usually easy to find online
    2. read a good joke- makes me laugh for the day
    3. tell someone you love that they look beautiful and say it with a smile
    4. ask someone if you can help them with something
    5. every once in a while- buy yourself a bouquet of flowers- for men, buy yourself something you can look at and feel happy about
    6. eat an apple- it’s always healthy for your body and good too
    7. take a nice bath-it always is a treat to oneself
    8. massage your feet with lotion- it’s cheap and doesn’t require anyone to help you
    9. have a nice warm cup of tea before bed
    10. call a friend or a family member
    11. visit a book store and pick something you wouldn’t normally read, or read something you would love to read
    12. have a yogurt
    13. think about things that have made you happy
    14. plan to visit the beach
    and there are my remedies… for now. as I have more, like trying on a new lipstick, buying a piece of jewelry, a scarf, and smelling nice perfumed scents, also, hugging someone…giving lots of hugs always helps!
    NIKKI

  • Yvonne

    Over time I have made great changes in my attitude about life. It started young before I was conditioned by society where “The Secret was already in my heart and soul….I was very opptomistic as a young child and not matter what, I could handle the challenges and make something that did not feel good into something wonderful….
    Later on I suffered a divorce that was brought on by a truama that had occured in my life. This really threw me a curve within my positive attitude. It took me years to heal, but I did. I am now on the path of realizing my potential as a spritual being and my gifts of being highly clairvoyant and intuitive are now being used. I have started a woman’s circle for the divine feminine in helping womaen to harness back their power and learn to nurture back themselves and find their gifts that they had forgotton. It is a wonderful way of expression and healing takes place….I have more ups than downs, I do not dwell in the negative, I am a peaceful soul and always have a smile on my face….
    So, walk your bliss, shine in your own lovelight…much peace to all….Yvonne/lakotawoman

  • Janice

    Reading Benifit always warms my heart and makes my day happier. Thank You

  • Your Name

    Well I having beeen useing the secret for awhile and was really happy that it was working then the worst thing happen my daughter passed away now I think why oh why being in state of shock I always had the feeling that things happen should not have happen and was I using this wrong .. Over the last pass year I have read alot about these things and if I am going to ever get out of this dark place then I have to start doing it agian .. I can not change what have happen but I can help change the path that this will take me .. So I say thank you every day and really try to mean it and put some good throught out there so I can get some kind of help with the future .. I really do believe that we are just spirts going around this world and when Bad things happen yes but in order for the soul to grow and advance bad things must happen. Other wise the soul would be stuck in 1 place for ever. God come into this because of unconditional love. They offer hope, and place to lay burdens to make our life easier to walk on this earth in bodies not meant to last forever. He comes into this because without him we’d not be here to begin with. May be a way to look at self and others is to think : We are spiritual beings having a physical experence NOT we are physical beings having a spiritual experience. I hope that one day we can all have something someone to believe in because without that we are not enjoying what was so freely given to us life . I believe most people take it for granted that our love ones and friends will be here for ever but when they are gone we have to kook deep inside to really see what we are made off

  • LAMB

    Buy flowers for my husband and myself. This way I have brightened up my day and will brighten up his too.

  • Lori

    I’m making to do list and setting goals for myself so everyday I am accomplishing something. I am living. I am not stagnant. I am growing and moving in positive directions.

  • Your Name

    I’m living in NOW, saying thanks to everything I can think of every morning.I am grateful for every wonderful opportunity to realise that I am really happy. I believe that I have everything I need.I try to see and pay an attention to the beauty around – in nature, in people. And when appears someone who could spoil my day I simply imagine him/her with an angels wings…

  • Your Name

    Want to respond to the poor woman who’s daughter passed away and offer her my deepest condolence for her tragic loss. Unfortunately, I know how much pain she’s in because I too lost my beautiful daughter at age 23, five years ago. I keep trying to do nice things to help others to try to fill the hole in my heart. I shower my grandchildren with love and attention and try to bring the family together as often as possible. It’s so difficult to try to go on each day but talking to a sympathetic and compassionate friend really helps.

  • Maureen

    After a very special friend died last week, I practice an attitude of gratitude. It works for me!

  • Your Name

    I had the opportunity to reach out to two women who are struggling with school today, and to help them to feel more positive about their futures. That helped them, but also helped me because I drew on my own positive expereinces to share with them how major obstacles can be overcome and goals met.
    I am studying for a career in Human Services, with a goal of working with disadvantaged women of color, to help them to become empowered and self-actualized. It is my pupose to “pay it forward”, for all the blessings and helping hands that I have received in my lifetime. Today, I am remembering where I was, and how far I have come, and that has made this day a positively beautiful one.

  • carderock

    I’m negotiating to “win” my positive energy and keep it flowing forward by being more merciful and just. God forgives us for His sake–not because we impressed God. When we change our minds it’s because we finally cooperate with God’s loving mercy and forgive ourselves and others. Then we become like God in justice and mercy.
    This is a big move for me, because it means I can no longer play God. You just let people go and be themselves instead of carrying their burdens and trying to fix them. By mediating and negotiating with the entire universe, the entire spectrum of negativity that people mindlessly throw at the world as worry or concern no longer becomes a burden for me and I am left carefree. If mud splashes on the windshield of life, I can turn on the wiper fluid, sprinkle it and wipe it off or I can fretfully keep driving my car with muddy vision, complaining and lurching into ditches. When I sprinkle some forgiveness and mercy around, sure enough, I see my way clearly. Then I’m back on my way, carefree. Muddy vision is criticism and judgmental reactions–either mine or others. Really, if we saw things like God, you’d have to agree that we can make as many mistakes as we want in life and God still loves us. Isn’t it amazing that the people who “dare” to make mistakes have the most success? So criticism has to go. That includes criticizing ourselves for making a mistake, errors in judgment or anything that comes along to teach us about life. Edison kept a record of all his mistakes in a book of experiments as he made his way up the ladder of experiment towards success. Whitewashing our mistakes in the mistaken notion of positive thinking will save us from them is nonsense. We need to look at our mistakes–but with love and scientific learning towards ourselves. It is essential to not only encounter ourselves this way, but to laugh at ourselves, too. “There is a pony in all this horse****!” is one way to look at it.
    As “problems” vanish when realization dawns that I always had the power to make them go away, like Dorothy with her red shoes, I can go back to Kansas more powerful and trusting in the way things really work in the universe.

  • Your Name

    I am utterly thankful for this day that God has given.
    Pamala

  • Your Name

    AH;I feel like i’m back home,when I come to this site.I was wandering all these days.This site keeps me to be back home or rather Godhead.
    And about staying positive,according to me is Not to leave God’s hand.It’S WE silly idiots that always abandon the protection that God always wants to give us.

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