I had the privilege of meeting up with you for the first time in nearly 20 years just two weeks ago. When we met up you were remarking about being in the middle of the first anniversary of your parents tragic and untimely deaths and how they were less than 3 weeks apart. You said,…”The month of April is always going to suck!.” I know it does now-but here’s a little uncanny advice (from me to you)…It’s going to take a lot of your inner strength but you can do this and maybe spread it to your siblings or other relatives and friends. 

Each year slowly try to make April the greatest month of the year by celebrating the lives of your parents separately and together. Some examples: If your dad loved chocolate chip cookies-bake dozens and send them to those who knew it. Include a note remembering him that day. If your mom was a fan of a certain musical group, make a CD and send it to friends and family with a note reminiscing about her air guitar abilities. Then play it really loud and dance around the house. If your parents loved the beach, take your husband on a romantic date with a picnic to the sand and water like your parents would have done. Maybe you can have an annual dinner. Not a pity party but a celebration of their lives with your siblings, family, friends and order in what they would have liked-Chinese, pizza, whatever and enjoy. 

Try to turn a negative into a positive. Mom was a nurse, so send roses to a nurse (any nurse-anonymously) thanking her for her hard work in memory of your mom. Your dad was a New York City firefighter, so send a cake to a firehouse for the crew to share with an anonymous note for them to celebrate a brothers life and their own. Don’t let April consume you with grief-as time passes good things will occur in this month again. Your children could marry in the month of April, your future grand children could be born, you could be named to the NY Times best sellers list!…Make April a good Month for Mom, Dad, you and yours.