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Everyday Inspiration

Everyday Inspiration

Secret Two of a Happy Marriage: Meet Each Other’s Needs

posted by Alex Blackwell

Secret Two of a Happy Marriage

A note from Alex: Welcome to the second post in a new five-part series, The Five Secrets of a Happy Marriage.

The following five secrets have worked very well in my marriage for more than 30 years. Follow these secrets and adapt them to work in your own marriage, and you’ll be on your way to having what we all want – a happy marriage.

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1. Communicate
2. Meet each other’s needs
3. Learn to resolve conflicts
4. Grow with each other
5. Maintain a commitment to the marriage

Second Secret: Meet Each Other’s Needs

Marriage can be demanding and sometimes frustrating. At times, you may find yourself not being courteous to each other. More dangerously, you and your partner could stop seeing each other as important and will begin putting other things, like work, hobbies or the children, before the marriage.

Successful couples; however, always keep the needs of their partner first. To keep the marriage on track, make an effort not to take each other for granted and remember how lucky you are to be married.

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The secret inside the secret of meeting each other’s needs is the real nugget to discover. Simply put, if you focus exclusively on meeting the needs of your spouse, and not your own, you will be rewarded with having your needs met.

To do this, you must trust your spouse and have confidence that your partner is capable of meeting your needs.
More importantly, realize this inner secret will take courage on your part. You must learn to surrender your doubts and insecurities and take a big step outside of your comfort zone. Acknowledge the fear, but remain determined to keep forging ahead.

The dilemma that many people face with this approach is the fear that if they stop asking for their needs to be met, then their needs will stop being met by their spouse. The reality is that the opposite couldn’t be truer.

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Take a step back for a moment and examine your marriage. Forget what you need, or want, and focus on the expressed needs of your husband or wife.

Make an honest assessment if you are doing everything (within reason) to meet those needs. If not, then perhaps you will realize your own needs are not being met either – there is a direct correlation between these two events.

Walk through the doubt, leave your needs there, and begin to focus on your partner. Growth for the marriage, and for you, lives on the other side.

Image Source: Google images

About Alex Blackwell
Alex Blackwell is a father, husband and writer.

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10 Morning Rituals that Bring Inspiration

posted by Alex Blackwell

morning inspiration

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” – Marcus Aurelius

Every morning when you wake up, you have a question to ask: What kind of mood are you going to start your day with?

You have the choice. It isn’t outside factors that get to decide if your day is going to be boring, frustrating or lacking inspiration. It’s you!

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Once you roll out of bed, you probably have a ritual. The ritual may involve showering, drinking coffee, checking email and so on. What if you could do something just a little different that would help start your day off right and leave you feeling inspired?

Would you do it? Would beginning a busy day feeling as if you can handle anything inspire you? If so, here are 10 morning rituals that will help bring more inspiration to your day.

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Sunday Inspiration #78

posted by Alex Blackwell

Today’s Sunday Inspiration: For the days that feel dark and cold, remember to give way to happiness – it’s the one thing you can control.

“I vow to let go of all worries and anxiety in order to be light and free.” – Thich Nhat

be light and free

Image Source: Google Images

About Alex Blackwell
Alex Blackwell is a father, husband and writer.

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The Five Secrets of a Happy Marriage

posted by Alex Blackwell

happy marriage 1

A note from Alex: Welcome to the first post in a new five-part series, The Five Secrets of a Happy Marriage.

Having a happy marriage doesn’t just happen by accident. Marriage is a partnership, and like any partnership, it takes commitment, dedication and hard work to nurture it and help it grow strong.

The following five secrets have worked very well in my marriage for more than 30 years. Follow these secrets and adapt them to work in your own marriage, and you’ll be on your way to having what we all want – a happy marriage.

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1. Communicate
2. Meet each other’s needs
3. Learn to resolve conflicts
4. Grow with each other
5. Maintain a commitment to the marriage

First Secret: Communicate

Happy marriages depend on expressing your thoughts and emotions to each other, of speaking and being heard. If not, everything else will live on shaky ground.

To have a successful marriage you have to make yourself an expert in communicating with your spouse. You have to try to understand what your partner is saying, and sometimes not saying, as well as try to analyze the underlying message or desire.

If your spouse is trying to talk to you, whether it’s to find out what you want for dinner, to tell you about their day, or to discuss a problem in the marriage, give them the same courtesy you’d give a complete stranger, and listen! Don’t try to finish their sentences, don’t try to solve their problems, and don’t ever say, “I told you so!”

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Be Fully Present
The art of communicating and listening in your marriage is best illustrated when you are “fully present” for your spouse. To be fully present is to convey with your body language and attention that you not are distracted by any other event.

You let your spouse know he or she has all of the time necessary to talk. Your job is to listen, receive the information being shared and continue to provide a safe and nurturing environment. Even though you may not agree with everything being said, allow your spouse the space to communicate what’s on their mind.

Soon enough, it will be your turn to do the same. Therefore, model how you want your spouse to receive what you have to say.

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Ask the Chicken
Successful couples also talk deeply about their expectations of each other. Think of the old joke, “Why did the chicken cross the road?” The answer in context to your marriage should be, “Ask the chicken.”

The point is not to assume what you spouse thinks or wants. If you are unsure about anything, simply ask.

Ask how they are feeling, what they would like to do, and if you are giving them what they need. When you do, the path to intimacy begins with communication.

Image Source: Google images

About Alex Blackwell
Alex Blackwell is a father, husband and writer.

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Secret Two of a Happy Marriage: Meet Each Other's Needs
A note from Alex: Welcome to the second post in a new five-part series, The Five Secrets of a Happy Marriage. The following five secrets have worked very well in my marriage for more than 30 years. Follow these secrets and adapt them to work ...

posted 3:21:06am Apr. 16, 2015 | read full post »

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