Beliefnet
Everyday Ethics

I’ve weighed the question of whether we should be held accountable for the failings of our friends, I’ve raked myself over the coals for my unethical shoving-morals-down-throat technique when it comes to family — now, I wonder, is it wrong to simply phase a friend out because they’ve done something you find reprehensible? 

I’m not talking murder; I’m talking about dating a married man. With kids. Who is your boss.
Call me naive, but I was genuinely shocked when I found out about this. I didn’t think people I knew did things like this — or fell for something so…cliched
At first I tried to take it all in stride — no judge-y tone of voice, no “do you hear yourself?” scold. I tried to ask innocuous questions like, “what’s he like?” (a cheating scoundrel), and “where does he live?” (he deserves a nice place in hell). 

But after the initial conversation, I’ve become more and more upset by the whole thing. I want no part of it, not even as a supportive friend (because surely you should stick by your friends, even when they’re making a mistake, right?) 
She was my friend long before she became the “other woman”. So why does this one mistake (I can’t help it, I can’t believe her actions are anything but reprehensible) cancel out a friendship? Obviously I have the right to not be her friend if something she does makes me uncomfortable; but do I have the right to judge her so harshly? Or judge at all? 
How would you handle this situation? I could use some advice!
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