Dream Gates

Dream Gates


Loving the enemy in the rest room: emotional healing through dreams

posted by Robert Moss

“Kisses” urinals designed by by Meike van Schijnde

When I was in my 20s, I had a terrible enemy, a man with whom I fought many battles. The balance of blame is not something I choose to determine now; each of us was no doubt at fault. Years after we had parted company and the conflict period was over in regular life, I still dreamed we were fighting. One night, I dreamed I was in a men’s room, cleaning up, when my old adversary entered.

When he saw me, he puffed up like a human bull frog, bigger and bigger until he looked like a demon. In the dream, I realized I had a choice. I could regard him as a malevolent demon with which I needed to do battle, or I could do something else. I chose that something else. There, in the men’s room (of all places!) I said to the worst enemy I ever had, “I love you.”

No sooner had I spoken these words, than the air came out of him. He deflated like a punctured balloon. There, on the floor in front of me, in place of the man (and the demon) was a pink, innocent baby.

I rushed to the sink. I needed to throw up. As I purged, I saw that what was streaming from my mouth was a mess of rusty nails and rusty tacks, dozens, maybe hundreds of them. I knew, in the dream, that these embodied the hateful and harmful thoughts that had been projected against me, years ago. I felt cleansed and released, and rose from the dream, certain that something had been healed and resolved for good and all.

I never had any problems again with that old enemy, in dreams or in regular life. Because dream experiences are transpersonal as well as personal, and because thoughts are actions that can reach people at a distance, I like to think that the healing power of my dream reached my old adversary as well, and did him some good.

Since dreaming can also be time travel, it is not impossible that such healing power could be transferred back to younger selves in their own time.

My men’s room dream did not start as a lucid dream in the sense of being one of those dreams in which you know you are dreaming. The scene in the men’s room was absolutely real to me, as were the irruption into the scene and the subsequent energetic transformations of my old enemy. My dream self may not have been “lucid” by current definitions, but he was fully conscious in a more important sense. He was fully aware that, in a conflicted situation, he had the power of choice.



  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Richelle

    very interesting , as most of my “bad” dreams take place in the bathroom. It wasnt until i had the courage to relieve/purge myself during the dream time or waking life in some form or other that the dreams stopped.

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Janice

    Hi, Robert. . . In my dream of your dream, what comes to mind is one of my favorite insights from A Course in MIracles: “Every thought is received by the body.” The symbolism of vomiting nails and rusty tacks, certainly is validating. Another thought from A Course in Miracles suggests that all attack is a call for love. I can see this in this dream, too, Robert, in the symbolism of the man’s transformation from demon to a pink, innocent baby.

    Thanks for sharing!

Previous Posts

Holding on to your dream handbag
I  don't carry a handbag myself, but I have come to know a bit about women’s purses and pocketbooks, and especially how they feature in dreams. I have talked with hundreds of women about their dreams of handbags over the years. In leading dream theater in my workshops I have been struck by how of

posted 7:46:26pm Nov. 22, 2014 | read full post »

Play the Lightning Dreamwork Game
After a lifetime of exploring and sharing dreams, I have invented a fun way to share dreams, get some nonauthoritarian and nonintrusive feedback, and move toward creative action. I call this the Lightning Dreamwork Game. It’s like lightning in two senses — it’s very quick (you can do it in fiv

posted 9:57:11am Nov. 06, 2014 | read full post »

Approaching Halloween: when the veil between the world thins
The hair salon on the corner advertises, "Halloween Makeup Done Here." There are spooks and scarecrows at the doors of the houses on my block. As we approach Halloween, I am thinking of the many meanings of the festival, from trick-or-treat to the turning of the year. This is the most magical, cr

posted 9:42:07am Oct. 30, 2014 | read full post »

Dreamwork, the antidote to the League of Fear and Contempt
Why do so many adults in Western society deny that they dream or insist that dreams do not matter? These attitudes are partly the work of societal pressures, and of the authority we have assigned to two kinds of authority: those who have aspired to control our inner lives and those who have sugge

posted 6:10:51pm Sep. 24, 2014 | read full post »

Traveling dream souls of indigenous peoples
Indigenous peoples recognize multiple aspects of soul, with different destinies after death and different degrees of mobility during life. Thus the Chiquitano believe a human has three souls, called the shadow soul, the blood soul and the breath soul. During dreams the blood soul (otor) can wande

posted 4:16:01am Sep. 20, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.