Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together

Disturbed by the Cover of Time Magazine?

posted by Linda Mintle

First let me say, I am a huge advocate of breast feeding. I have worked on committees that target business to establish breast feeding rooms for nursing moms and breast fed both of my children. So when TIME magazine brought attention to the topic this past issue,  I was glad. But I was disturbed by the cover photo.

Were you?

Maybe I have seen too many pathological people in therapy over the years but that cover (see the photo) feels like it sexualizes  children. The photo looks too sensual and distracts from the message. I kept thinking of all the child predators who love that photo and the pre-teen boys who see it in the grocery store and aren’t sure what to make of it. And looking at the Twitter comments, I am not the only one who felt this way. The x rated jokes will follow that poor child into the classroom in a few years.

According to the Center for Disease control,  fewer than 15% of babies are breast fed through the first six months (CDC). “The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) recommends that breastfeeding continue for at least 12 months, and thereafter for as long as mother and baby desire. The World Health Organization recommends continued breastfeeding up to 2 years of age or beyond. Breast feeding is good for mother and baby. ”

Dr. Bill Sears,well-known pediatrician,, is an advocate of “attachment parenting” which includes breast feeding until the child weans. The approach is controversial.

If the point of this cover was to get our attention, it did just that.

So what did you think?

Will it forward the cause of breastfeeding?

Will it make breastfeeding more accepted in public?

Or will this do more harm than good?

 

Dr. Linda Mintle And Joyce Meyer Discuss Body Image

posted by Linda Mintle

Awhile back, I sat down with Joyce Meyer on her TV show, Enjoying Everyday Life, to talk about how to embrace your body and make peace with it.

Here is the You Tube interview, “You Are Beautiful Inside & Out, Part I”

YouTube Preview Image

Happy Mother’s Day: Giving Back to Mom

posted by Linda Mintle

Even though my mom is no longer with me, I will miss her this Mother’s Day! This is a picture of us celebrating years ago. And while my mother-daughter relationship was not perfect, there was so much she gave me that has helped me become the person I am today.

I thought it would be great if we could acknowledge the good things we got from our moms this Mother’s Day. Sometimes, we  focus on the negatives and problems in the mother-child relationship and fail to acknowledge the good things passed on to us.

Mothers teach us how to be intimate, to deal with conflict, how to feel about our bodies, how to cope, walk out our faith, and so much more.

As a tribute to mom, name one positive thing your mom gave you that you appreciate.

I’ll begin. My mom gave me…

A sense of independence

A model of equal partnership with my father

Faith and a Christian upbringing

Common sense

A role model for balancing business and family

People skills

Those are just a few of the things I can quickly recall.

What are you grateful for when it comes to your mom? Let’s start posting!

 

For help with Mother-Daughter relationships, check out my book, I Love My Mother But…

“This book is not just for women who have broken or damaged relationships with their mothers. I am fortunate to be able to say “I love my mother.” No but! And still this book is a great resource on how to improve this intimate, foundational relationship in every person’s life. Every relationship can be improved by conscious effort to understand and honor the other person. Dr. Mintle tells great stories and gives concrete ideas on just how to do that with your mother.”

 

A Mother’s Day Dilemma: How to Deal With a Mom Who Left

posted by Linda Mintle

In this week’s lead up to Mother’s Day, an adult daughter asks…

Every Mother’s Day I have a hard time honoring my mom for this reason. She left our family to be with another man when I was 14. It still hurts when I think about what my family experienced as a result of her decision.  Consequently, I never know how to approach Mother’s Day. I think I am still angry with her for what she did. And my mom wants to have a relationship with me now.

 I would ask you to examine your heart. Have you really forgiven her for what she did? If there is any unforgiveness still in you, release it to the Lord. Forgiveness is a choice you make. It doesn’t condone what she did or minimize the impact on you. We forgive because Jesus forgave us when we didn’t deserve it. He asks that we do no less. Then, ask yourself if you are still judging her. Yes, her choice was sinful. But she must answer to God for what she did. Next, think about the impact her choice had on your life and decide if you want to confront her with this. Perhaps you need a conversation in which you tell her how her choice affected you. That said, do not have any expectations about her response to you. The point is to let her know what happened to you as a daughter. If she makes a move to ask for forgiveness, accept it. Then reconciliation may be possible. However, reconciliation takes the work of two people. Discuss a next step and decide if you are both willing to risk it. If not, at least you have moved through the forgiveness and can approach Mother’s Day with a forgiving heart. This will improve your life and own mothering. If your mother refuses to ask for forgiveness and denies the impact of her actions on you, then you will need to grieve the loss of an intimate relationship with your mom and trust God to fill in that gap.

 

For more help, order Dr. Linda Mintle’s book, I Love My Mother But..

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