Beliefnet
Doing Life Together

paper-3139127_640It’s the month of love! As we celebrate matches we hope are made in heaven, do you pay attention to your financial compatibility when it comes to choosing a partner? Money talk is not the most romantic topic when you are looking for a mate. But money compatibility matters and can help a relationship.  When you are looking for a life partner,it is a good idea to talk about financial goals.

When couples struggle, the topic of money often surfaces. Sometimes finances can be the deal that broke the couple apart. The Money Coach and New York Times best-selling author, Lynnette Khalfani-Cox, reports that 70% of couples who divorce say they had financial woes. When couples have different ideas about how their money is spent, it can create on-going conflict. In fact, Khalfani-Cox also informs us that a third of the people she surveyed felt that financial infidelity was worse than sexual infidelity.

So what can a couple do if they are struggling to agree on how to run their finances?

  1. Discuss- you have to talk about your approach to money. This includes sharing accounts or having separate ones, savings, debt, credit cards, on-ine purchases and more. Bring up your spending habits to know if this is will be an area of conflict.
  2. Disclose-it may not be polite to ask about money when you first begin to date, but when things get serious and marriage is on the line, disclosure regarding salaries, assets and spending habits are fair game. A credit score disclosure is a sign of trust and intimacy. If there are problems, this is the time to talk. And the disclosures will give you information to create a budget.
  3. Decide-what you want to do about the compatibility or incompatibility. Do you need a financial coach or planner? Will you need to close out accounts, get rid of credit cards or have a plan to pay down debt? Whatever you can do to lessen financial stress and agree on a strategy, the better it will be for your relationship health.

So when it gets serious, have these crucial conversations about money! Your finances matter in marriage.

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