Advertisement

Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together

Are the Rules of Dating Confusing You?

text“Going to O’Reilly’s. Join me at 7″

When Sarah received this message, she wasn’t sure if Jason was asking her on a date or just wanted her to hang out with friends. The message came by text. She was hoping for more than a friendship with Jason, but not sure where he stands. Was this a gesture of dating? She wasn’t sure. 

Sarah isn’t the only one. A survey by USA TODAY among 2647 singles found that 69% of people between the ages of 18-59 who are single are equally confused.

Advertisement

Is a date a planned evening withe friends, an individual invitation or a direct ask out?

Usually, we think we need to show special interest in a person and ask him or her out. But technology makes the ask a bit unclear.

So what can you do if you are uncertain?

Text back and clarify? This may back fire. If it the invitation was only a friendship one, awkward!

Go and find out as the evening unfolds. Probably an OK strategy. Be ready for either option since you can’t always determine what a person is thinking or asking from a text!

Call, talk to the person and see if you can get more information. Sometimes, a live interaction can help you read tone and intent better.

It’s a new frontier but nothing beats the face to face contact!

 

  • trlkly

    A lot of people specifically recommend being vague about whether you are on a date or not, for pretty much the same reason that you recommend not asking for clarification. If the other person views you as just a friend, it may make things awkward.

    Because I know that, just because it turns out we are not romantically compatible doesn’t mean I don’t want to hang out with you. Yet, the way everything is set up nowadays, it’s always either one or the other. You can’t tell someone you would like to be romantically involved, have them disagree, and then just hang out as friends. IT would be so much better if that didn’t make everything so awkward.

    Because, come on. Being someone I want to be friends with is a requirement for me to want to date you. Of course I would like to just be your friend if dating is off the table.

Previous Posts

Are You Practicing The Best Parenting Style?
Parenting is on John's mind now that his second child has arrived. John was raised by a father who was harsh and demanding. John often felt as if he could not live up to his father's expectations. Now a father himself, John is aware that his ...

posted 7:00:20am Jun. 29, 2015 | read full post »

Are You Genetically Predisposed to Worry?
Susan feels she can’t stop worrying no matter how hard she tries. She’s beginning to wonder if she is a born worry. She is asking, "Can worry be genetic?" In 2007, Yale researchers found a gene variation associated with chronic worrying ...

posted 7:00:57am Jun. 26, 2015 | read full post »

Does God Hide in Times of Trouble?
When Christians are being beheaded in the middle east, when a man shoots people praying in a church, when young girls are taken and forced into sex slavery, when you are falsely accused or ridiculed for your beliefs, it often feels like God is ...

posted 7:00:35am Jun. 24, 2015 | read full post »

Should You Keep Secrets From Your Partner?
I was in the grocery store and the tabloids were headlining the secret love child of yet another celebrity couple. Secrets are a problem. They don’t usually end well. I am often asked if it is a good idea to reveal secrets to a partner or a ...

posted 7:00:25am Jun. 22, 2015 | read full post »

The Gift Your Father Gave You
Happy Father's Day! I know not everyone has a great relationship with his or her father. However, this Father’s Day, I encourage to think about your father and find one thing he gave you as a gift. Some of you will think of many things, others ...

posted 7:00:16am Jun. 19, 2015 | read full post »

Advertisement


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.