Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together


Anxious? Don’t Avoid the Fear.

posted by Linda Mintle

Letting Go of Worry -- WebWhen Julie was a child, she was bitten by a dog and developed a terrible fear of dogs. She desperately wants to overcome that fear. Today, she agreed to visit a good friend who has a small submissive dog. When she rang the doorbell, she heard the dog bark and fear gripped her.

What should Julie do with her fear that the dog will bite her?

Should she avoid the dog and return to her car?

Should she resist the fearful thought?

Should she distract herself from thinking about the dog?

Actually Julie should do none of the above.

The best thing Julie could do is face the fear and the anxious feelings. The more she tries to avoid or resist, the stronger the fear grows.

Instead, she should tell herself, “I feel really anxious but I can do this. I am sweating but I won’t die from this.”

Julie should stay in the doorway as long as she can. The key here is for Julie to tolerate that anxious feeling as long as possible. The more she can do this, the more she will tackle the fear.

When anxious thoughts come into your mind, identify them, and tolerate the momentary feeling. Then correct the thought with something more reasonable like, “Yes I am afraid but God is with me and will get me through this. I can take it.” As you correct the thought to something more reasonable and tolerate the feeling, the anxiety will most likely decrease.

 

 



Previous Posts

Loving Your Body, Imperfections and All!
Is it so difficult to accept the bodies we’ve been given, to celebrate them as uniquely designed by God and created in His image? Apparently. Loving, even liking, your body is a rare thing in today’s culture. It seems we all belong to the sisterhood of the dissatisfied traveling pants! If we

posted 6:00:33am Oct. 16, 2014 | read full post »

What Type of Decision Maker are You?
Last week, I was going out of town for the weekend. I spent hours going over my wardrobe choices. What if it rains, gets cold, I want something more formal, etc.? My husband opened his suitcase, threw in a few outfits and was done with it. No looking back, waffling or hanging in the air with poss

posted 6:00:55am Oct. 14, 2014 | read full post »

5 Coaching Tips to Improve Adult Mother-Daughter Relations
Mandy was at the end of her rope with her mom when she called me for coaching. Every conversation ended with frustration. Why couldn’t the two of them get along better? Why did her mom constantly criticize her and tell her what to do? But Mandy’s biggest concern was how could she handle her mom

posted 6:00:18am Oct. 13, 2014 | read full post »

Why Our Wants May Not Turn Out to Be Our Likes
When our first dog died, we thought we wanted another. We did, but when we got the dog and our schedules all demanded more time, the dog became more of an imposition. Don’t get me wrong, we love her to pieces, but sometimes our happiness goes out the window when we are all trying to figure out how

posted 6:00:09am Oct. 09, 2014 | read full post »

Does Happiness Affect Your Success?
Happiness is a good thing, right? Yes and no. There is actually a down side to too much happiness. 1)   Happy people tend to be less persuasive. When happy, you can overlook details. Unhappy people can focus more on the details, create stronger arguments and thus do better with persuasion.

posted 6:00:24am Oct. 08, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.