Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together


Stressed? One Way You Can Stop It

posted by Linda Mintle

“Sure I’ll cook for the spaghetti dinner.”

“Yes I can baby-sit your children for the day.”

“Yes, I can chair another committee.”

“Since no one else will volunteer, I guess I’ll do it.”

 

Do you ever find yourself saying these things and then realize you’ve taken on too much? You’ve committed to doing more than you can realistically handle. As a result, you are stressed and kicking yourself for not saying no.

When we don’t say NO is usually because we are afraid to speak up; don’t feel we have the right; need to please others; want to be loved for what we do; or think we have to be super person and do it all! Time to turn in your cape! Learn to say “No” and not feel guilty. You’ll reduce the stress in your life.

Saying “No” to things requires assertiveness. Assertiveness is behavior that falls somewhere in the middle of giving in and aggressiveness. It is not giving in to the wants of others or keeping silent and expecting people to read your mind. It is also not yelling at people and demanding your way. It is a practiced skill that helps you manage stress. Contrary to popular thought, you don’t have to be angry to be assertive. In fact, I prefer you stay calm.

There are two parts involved in being assertive: 1) know what you want 2) say it.  One of the reasons we don’t practice being assertive is because we don’t know what we want. We allow others to manipulate us in to doing things and then feel resentful because we have too much to do. Or we feel guilty and don’t believe we have the right to speak up.

When you address problems as they occur, you won’t build up anger and hold on to things that can grow into resentment. Often times, this is the root of depression, anxiety and eating disorders.

The benefits from speaking up are improved physical and psychological health. Your relationships will improve and you will better manage stress. In addition, you will gain respect from people. They may not like your stance, but they will respect you for taking one.

 

 



Previous Posts

Treating Binge Eating With Medication?
Every day Sally vows she will not eat herself sick. But today is no different. She is distressed, eating past full and feeling as if she has no control. Sally suffers from Binge Eating Disorder (BED) which has been recognized as a psychiatric disorder. To date, there are no medications approved f

posted 6:00:35am Jan. 26, 2015 | read full post »

Is Binge Drinking Just College Fun?
In the throws of January, college students begin dreaming about Spring Break. Those plans often include partying on a beach with nonstop drinking. Binge drinking is "a pattern of drinking that brings blood alcohol concentration (BAC) levels to 0.08 g/dL. This typically occurs after 4 drinks for w

posted 6:00:57am Jan. 23, 2015 | read full post »

Does the Cold Make You Catch a Cold?
My mom used to tell me to put a hat on my baby when the weather was cold. I used to argue, "Mom, babies don't catch colds from the cold. They get them from viruses. I'm not putting a hat on the baby." But now it seems that my mom could have been on to something. Could the cold weather actually p

posted 6:00:36am Jan. 21, 2015 | read full post »

How Often Should I Weigh Myself?
We all know that the number on the scale isn't suppose to define us, but that doesn't stop us from thinking about how much we weigh on any given day. And the number often influences our mood. So how often should we weigh? Every day, once a week, once a month? The answer depends on your goal--t

posted 6:00:28am Jan. 19, 2015 | read full post »

Do Professional Women Have a Place in the Church?
It was a usual Sunday and time for announcements. The Associate Pastor announced the women's meeting at 10:00 a.m. on Tuesday. The focus was on decorating the church for the holidays. The men were meeting Friday morning at 6:30 am. to discuss marketplace ministry. I looked at my husband and whispere

posted 6:00:30am Jan. 16, 2015 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.