Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together

How To Handle a Bully

Now that we are well into the school year, kids everywhere are faced with the challenge of how to deal with bullies.

Here’s a typical encounter: Your 5th grade son is playing soccer on the playground at recess. A 6th grade bully comes over and takes his ball, throws it at him and laughs as he walks away. What should your son do?

a) Throw the ball back at him

b) Walk away and say nothing

c) Report the boy to school authorities

d) Go after the kid and try to talk to him

e) Initiate “The Swarm”

Dads tend to choose answer A because they want their sons to fight back. Moms like answer D because we think problems can be solved by talking them out. Answer B is good if you can get your son to do it, but it does nothing to correct the bully behavior.  Answer C works if adults are involved and will actually do something. Reporting a bully is sometimes unpopular because kids fear revenge and being labeled a tattletale. So that leaves us with answer E. The Swarm is an effective technique. Your son gets a number of his friends to literally swarm the bully and tell the bully to stop. There is power in numbers and the bully will have to contend with the entire group, not just your son.

You can also help your children prepare for a bully attack this way. Ask them to write down bully situations on 3 X 5 cards. They will come up with examples in no time. Then role-play the situations and practice different ways to handle a specific problem. Talk about why some solutions are good choices and others not so good. Role-playing exercises like this one helps children think what they might do before they encounter the problem. Then when a bully situation presents, they have a plan and can act more confidently.

 

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Ellena Smith

    In my opinion, bullying is a real problem that needs to be solved as a family and the best we can do parent, is that pay attention with our children. Being a good listener is an important piece of your role when a child is being bullied, try to be supportive but neutral when your child is talking. The idea of my children being harmed or lost is not something anyone wants to consider. I would like to share this link, about a service on how to protect children. Check out this link: http://safekidzone.com/

  • Pingback: How To Handle a Bully | Dr. Linda Mintle

Previous Posts

A Therapeutic Way to Deal With Heartache or Tragedy
He sat in my office and told me his father died suddenly of a heart attack. There was no warning and he and his mom were heartbroken.  She was crying as she talked about her 20 year marriage coming to an end. Her husband words, "I don't love you and want out," hit hard.  He never saw it comi

posted 6:00:05am Feb. 27, 2015 | read full post »

Take the Quiz: Do You Love Money Too Much?
Money, money, money...The OJays sang about it, reminding us us what people will do for the love of money-steal from their mother, rob from their brother, lie, cheat and don't care who they hurt or beat, etc. In Matthew, Jesus tells us that you can't love money and God. He chided the religious le

posted 6:00:17am Feb. 25, 2015 | read full post »

A School Success Measure More Important Than Intelligence
These days, parents seemed consumed with their children getting high test scores. The belief is that high test scores predicts academic success. But a new study suggests that parents should put their efforts elsewhere--in developing the personalities of their children. With more concern about wh

posted 6:00:29am Feb. 23, 2015 | read full post »

One Way to Facilitate the Feeling of Love
Rosie is a little anxious about her first date with Sean. We all know how important first impressions are when it comes to finding love. After a few outings at a local coffee shop, her feelings of attraction were obvious. The setting was intimate, soft  music played in the background and th

posted 6:00:15am Feb. 20, 2015 | read full post »

Want to Stay Young? Engage in the Arts!
Music, dance, drawing, reading, listening to poetry--all ways we can engage the arts. But is there a connection between staying young and engaging these activities? Yes, engaging in the arts helps you stay young. 1) Take up dancing. Dancing is not only aerobic but it challenges the brain. So t

posted 6:00:45am Feb. 18, 2015 | read full post »


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.