Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together

How To Handle a Bully

Now that we are well into the school year, kids everywhere are faced with the challenge of how to deal with bullies.

Here’s a typical encounter: Your 5th grade son is playing soccer on the playground at recess. A 6th grade bully comes over and takes his ball, throws it at him and laughs as he walks away. What should your son do?

a) Throw the ball back at him

b) Walk away and say nothing

c) Report the boy to school authorities

d) Go after the kid and try to talk to him

e) Initiate “The Swarm”

Dads tend to choose answer A because they want their sons to fight back. Moms like answer D because we think problems can be solved by talking them out. Answer B is good if you can get your son to do it, but it does nothing to correct the bully behavior.  Answer C works if adults are involved and will actually do something. Reporting a bully is sometimes unpopular because kids fear revenge and being labeled a tattletale. So that leaves us with answer E. The Swarm is an effective technique. Your son gets a number of his friends to literally swarm the bully and tell the bully to stop. There is power in numbers and the bully will have to contend with the entire group, not just your son.


You can also help your children prepare for a bully attack this way. Ask them to write down bully situations on 3 X 5 cards. They will come up with examples in no time. Then role-play the situations and practice different ways to handle a specific problem. Talk about why some solutions are good choices and others not so good. Role-playing exercises like this one helps children think what they might do before they encounter the problem. Then when a bully situation presents, they have a plan and can act more confidently.


  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Ellena Smith

    In my opinion, bullying is a real problem that needs to be solved as a family and the best we can do parent, is that pay attention with our children. Being a good listener is an important piece of your role when a child is being bullied, try to be supportive but neutral when your child is talking. The idea of my children being harmed or lost is not something anyone wants to consider. I would like to share this link, about a service on how to protect children. Check out this link:

  • Pingback: How To Handle a Bully | Dr. Linda Mintle

Previous Posts

Gratitude: How It Changes Us in Positive Ways
I've been keeping a gratitude journal for the past weeks. Each day, I write down 3 things for which I am thankful. Focusing on gratitude changes a person. If you want to know how, watch my blog to learn about the many benefits of ...

posted 7:00:39am Nov. 23, 2015 | read full post »

What's Your Relationship Deal Breaker?
My daughter was talking to us about relationships the other night. We asked about one young man she knew and her instant response was, "Too needy!" For her, that was a deal breaker. As I thought about this, we all have those deal breakers that ...

posted 7:00:06am Nov. 20, 2015 | read full post »

Exercise More, Lose Weight? Not Really!
Eat less, exercise more. That is the weight loss mantra, right? The role of exercise in weight loss is often misunderstood. The State of Texas knows this first hand. They spend 37 million dollars on grants to help children in poverty reduce ...

posted 7:00:29am Nov. 18, 2015 | read full post »

Move Over "No Shave", It's No SHAME November
I have to admit, I'm not a fan of No Shave November. I look forward to the month ending in order to see the faces of the men I care about again. But one of my producers had a different take on the No Shave idea and wrote a thoughtful spot for me ...

posted 7:00:35am Nov. 17, 2015 | read full post »

How Sex, Hot Chocolate and 3 D Movies Keep Your Mind Sharp
We all want to remain on top of our game as along as possible as we age. We've heard a lot about doing puzzles and mental activities that require cognitive engagement. But how about some fun ways to keep your mind sharp? A few may even surprise ...

posted 7:00:27am Nov. 13, 2015 | read full post »


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.