Doing Life Together

Doing Life Together


The Key To Staying Married

posted by Linda Mintle

“I like you and want to stay married.” Great. But that probably isn’t going to cut it unless the commitment is much deeper.

Think about it. Most people stay committed when the relationship goes well, but what about when stress mounts and pressure comes your way? Then what happens to commitment?

It’s when we experience the hard times that the level of commitment you have to the relationship really counts.

Commitment means staying in the game when it feels bad and isn’t exactly going your way. This is when the committed partner takes action and says, “OK, let’s deal with the problems and work it out.”

And this is where sacrifice comes in–you may have to compromise or do things you aren’t thrilled about like helping clean bathrooms, take out the trash or watch a TV show your partner likes.  But this level of commitment–where sacrifice and compromise come in–helps couples go the distance.

A study of newlyweds in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology supports the role commitment plays. When couples take their vows and commit to the good and bad of relationships, they better mean it or the chances of breaking up increases. Of course, I am not talking about staying in an abusive relationship or one that puts you at risk physically.

When problems come, stay in the moment. Communicate, compromise and look at the big picture. It’s not about who wins, but all about how you work together to honor those vows.

 

 

Source: University of California – Los Angeles (2012, February 1). Here is what real commitment to your marriage means. ScienceDaily. Retrieved February 16, 2012, from http://www.sciencedaily.com­ /releases/2012/02/120201181453.htm



  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Alex

    Hi,
    Commitment in any relationship is how much you are active to maintain a health relation with your partner. You have to maintain love, affection, care and mutual understanding. This all make relationship more healthy and committed.
    Thanks for sharing.

    Project Commitment

  • http://foodscienceproductdevelopment.com Beverage Consulting

    I am not talking about staying in an abusive relationship or one that puts you at risk physically.

    its awesome !!

  • Pingback: The Key To Staying Married | Dr. Linda Mintle

Previous Posts

Christmas Shopping With Toddlers: Dr. Linda's 10 Tips
A reader asks: As much as I love to shop on-line, I prefer to tackle the masses during Christmas and head to the malls and store. My question is, “How can I shop with two little ones (ages two and four) and remain sane?” I will have to take them with me but really want to give it a try.  

posted 6:00:45am Dec. 17, 2014 | read full post »

What's Eating You This Holiday Season? Keep a Log and Find Out!
Joanne looked at the chocolate-covered donut in her hand. As she took her first bite, she wondered, "Why am I eating this? I''m not really hungry, but the plate of goodies sitting by the office coffee pot just looks good. Besides, my boss is making me crazy! But is there more to the story? F

posted 6:00:24am Dec. 16, 2014 | read full post »

10 Ideas to Avoid Depression During the Holidays
It's the most wonderful time of the year....well, not for everyone. Holidays can be difficult if you struggle with your mood and family issues. However, there are proactive ways to keep your spirit bright. 1) Don't overspend. Avoid being caught up in all the deals, discounts and e-shopping. Fi

posted 6:00:31am Dec. 12, 2014 | read full post »

6 Tips to Avoid Child Meltdowns During the Holidays
Are you dreading that trip in the car to grandparents? Is the hype of the holidays overstimulating your children? Too  much sugar, too little sleep? Try these 6 tips:   1) Routines and rituals: Try to keep as many going as you can. Even when you travel, insist on a regular bedti

posted 6:00:20am Dec. 10, 2014 | read full post »

Do You Really Want to Eat That Holiday Cake? 10 Ways to Stop!
I know, the Christmas cookies are everywhere. There are candies, special coffees, extra treats....all temptations to indulge. So before you dive into that third cookie, ask yourself, "Do I really want to eat this? Will I be upset and sorry later?" If the answer is, "No, I'll be upset later," here

posted 6:00:59am Dec. 08, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.