Beliefnet
Doing Life Together

Sometimes, you just want to shake a parent and say, “Really, get a grip.” That’s what I wanted to do to Miki Spies, the mother of high school senior Sydney. Instead of talking sense to her 18-year-0ld daughter, she is protesting along side her at her daughter’s high school. Here is why.

Sydney decided she wanted a sexy picture for her senior year photo in her yearbook. She submitted a pose that she felt was artsy and showed off her dancer body and desire to be a model. The yearbook editors (students) rejected it and asked  her to submit another pose. According to the local paper, the Durango Herald, the students told her she could not submit the photo  as a senior portrait but could use it in another section of the yearbook designated for paid senior advertisement. Thus, Sydney’s need to be artistically expressive could still be met in another section of the yearbook.

Apparently this didn’t satisfy Sydney or mom. According to the Huffington Post, the  mom posted this comment on her Facebook, “I wanted my daughter to chose a different photo but she is 18 and doesn’t always listen! I knew this would be hard and it’s proving to be.”

Now the mom is talking to a Denver lawyer to review her daughter’s case and might bring in the ACLU.

I say forget the ACLU and be a parent. What will you teach you daughter if you continue to pursue this?

How about talking to your daughter about decency?

How about talking to your daughter about following rules?

How about suggesting your daughter find a different outlet for her artistic expression? One that doesn’t go against the standard set by the editors.

How about not making senior photos about sex?

How about telling the lawyer you made a mistake and supporting the yearbook editors by placing her photo in another part of the yearbook? This might teach a bigger life lesson that she may need-respect for authority and following rules.

How about thinking about the editors point of view and what they would like to accomplish with the yearbook (maybe it is not all about Sydney)?

How about common sense? Do we really need yearbooks to look like cover shots for wanna be models? There are plenty of places to post those type of photos on the Internet.

How about looking at the bigger picture mom? Is it more important to fight for Sydney’s right to print a sexy senior portrait despite the standards already set, or is it more important to teach your daughter to respect others, herself, authority and be obedient to rules that still allow her to express herself and do not restrict her freedom of expression. To me, this is parenting 101. You don’t take on the school over this issue.

 

P.S. I am not attaching the photo because that is exactly what Sydney wants –more publicity, money and a modeling job. Sadly, she may get what she wants and learn no lesson here. And I realize that even writing about this is giving her publicity.

 

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