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5 questions to clear your fear | Terezia Farkas | depression help | Beliefnet

We’re all afraid of something. I once heard someone say that a person has at least 10 fears. The scariest fear is always the one rooted deepest in memory and the subconscious. So how can you clear your fear?

Fear doesn’t like questions

Fear doesn’t like questions. Questions reveal flaws in fear. It puts fear ‘out there’, in the light, instead of letting it hide in the shadows of your mind. Questions bring answers that educate, inform, or reveal truths. 

So what type of questions should you be asking fear? Collective Evolution, a really cool blog about changing how you think about life, came up with 5 questions to clear you of your fear.

5 questions to clear your fear:

 

What am I really SCARED of?

Writing down your fears gives you a guide to work through them. Unidentified fears cloud the mind. Writing them down liberates your brainpower.

For example, you’re anxious around new people. You start to fear meeting new people. You need to identify the fears that make you react anxiously in the first place. It might be some emotional trigger – the guy looks like your abusive dad, or he sounds angry and you’ve got problems dealing with angry people. Whatever the fear is, write it down! Now it’s in the light of day.

How does your fear SERVE you?

Appreciating your fears can tell you a lot about what is truly important to you. Being grateful for your fears also increases your appreciation for yourself.

Most of us don’t like to have fear because it makes us weak, or vulnerable. True. But what is that weakness or vulnerability trying to tell you about yourself? Fear of meeting new people may mean you feel vulnerable to judgement. Maybe you were judged harshly, suffered torment because of it. Fear protects you from repeating your past.

Is my fear actually REAL?

Fears are often anxieties projected onto the future. By determining their legitimacy, you start the process of clearing them from your life.

I’m afraid of being lonely in my future. My current anxiety is about being judged. I project that anxiety into my future and assume that no one will like me, and so I will be alone. But how true is that? Will absolutely no one ever like me? Will absolutely no one ever talk to me or look at me? Of course not. My fear isn’t real.

If it happened, how would it SERVE?

If your fear happened, how would it serve? What would be the benefits? By seeing how even the worst case scenario could have it’s upsides, you lessen the effect of fear.

This is a tough one to do. Most of us can’t imagine an upside to a fear. But for every downside, try finding a positive. I fear change. Change means my life is disrupted by someone else. Change serves me by making me grow as a person, by letting me discover strengths I had ignored. Change allows me to be resilient. To transform.

What can I do now to CHANGE it?

Many fears relate to areas of our lives that are disempowered. By taking action now, you can build your life to avoid it altogether.

I fear not having money in the future. I can change this by starting to slowly save. Maybe I’ll put aside only a few dollars a month and commit to not touching it for one year. Future is a long time, so I can define it, set limits to what future means. Future may be Christmas, in which case I’ll have money set aside for gifts.

Fear doesn’t have to be scary. Fear is a built-in mechanism to initiate change, to transform you. Approach your fear and question that fear.

Visit me on Twitter. Toss me a comment or two. I’d love to hear from you.

Twitter:  @tereziafarkas  #Positivity  #selfcare  #mindfulness
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