“Crazy busy,” is a frequently used phrase in the social media “status” bar. It seems like nearly everyone is zipping and moving faster than ever before. Rather than a letter taking days to arrive at our friend’s doorstep, there is an INSTANT message. And it seems so much of the items knocking on the door of our day want an instant response.
Warp speed. Hmmmm. People are beginning to express that fast doesn’t really equal quality, or excellence. There’s a case to be made for careful, purposeful examination of a project. How differently might my day have been a few weeks ago if I had taken a few more moments to review that radio interview commitment? I know for sure I wouldn’t have set my alarm for 4 AM and been sitting at my studio desk at 5:15 AM for a radio interview that was clearly scheduled for 12 hours later. My publicist kindly wrote to my inquiry of, “What happened?” a note that affirmed, “You KNOW it was for 5:30 PM, right?” I wrote back,
I KNOW NOW.
silly, silly me.
Saw an “A”
when it really was a “P.”
Warp speed is really helpful when running a sprint. When managing memo’s and planning your day: not so much. Try it. Let’s try it together…slooooow down. Breathe. And do ONE thing at a time. Just see what happens.
Each room hold laughter and every window open to great possibility.
I love going home! I love being home. I consider my home a sanctuary and a wonderful place to restore and renew and rest. While I cannot once every recall being called a domestic goddess by anyone…I do consider the opportunity to do housework an investment in my joy.
That said – I must also confess cleaning is not my favorite thing. But I love the result and the outcomes and have strategized, over the years, certain attitudes to make the tasks something I want to do. One’s attitude toward any thing – house work, school work or tax work – can be based on a commitment toward an outcome, not the actual task itself. And
a clean and tidy house is an outcome I treasure.
I suppose my husband is used to me telling stories about him by now. He’s a good sport. He is a broadly accomplished man. In other times he would have been called a renaissance man. A fine artist who makes an art of repairing an engine. Understanding the weather. Recognizing birds from great distances. Oh. But I digress. It’s sufficient to say he’s skilled at hosts of things and levels. Yet his life experience has not served up validation for this knowledge. His experience has been one of contradiction and doubt. Teasingly we suggest that he may have been raised by wolves. The tone is his home was one of criticism rather than celebration. So he’s been schooled to “stick up for himself.”
This very day I said to him, “You are so accomplished. Thank you for all the ways you make our home better.” His response sounded like he was arguing with me. “I DO make our home better.” We’ve talked about the fact that he has had to provide affirmation of his own skills throughout most of his life. At a cellular level he may be more prepared for criticism than praise.
Today, understanding that, I just took advantage of an editing trick. I asked, “Could we go back and just re-write that exchange? I’d like to see how you feel simply looking at me, seeing my love and saying out loud, ‘Thank you very much.’ “ We did.
The smile lingered on both our faces for quite a few minutes.
When you receive a compliment today…pause and make sure you aren’t getting ready to argue with the person giving it. Practice. Just say, “thank you.” It sweetens the moment for everyone.