The Bliss Blog

The Bliss Blog


Rocks Crumble

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Life can change in a heartbeat, quite literally. When I awoke on Thursday, June 12, 2014, I had no clue that a mere few hours later, I would be on a hospital gurney, with an IV in my arm and a tube up my vein to insert a stent into a collapsed artery in my heart. The day had begun quite normally. Light breakfast, a ‘normal’ gym workout with the intention to have  full schedule of therapy clients that would have taken me all the way to 7:30pm or so. That would be considered a ‘short day’, since there were some in which I wouldn’t cross my threshold until 9 pm or later. Imagine a pace like that for years at a time. Once home, I would be at the computer, writing articles, which is a true joy. Even so, my eyes wouldn’t close until close to midnight. Then there were times when they would flutter open a few hours later, as if I was being awakened by an insistent lover whose embrace I welcomed, but who didn’t quite get that this body needed rest and not just pleasure to sustain it.

When the actual event happened, I was in surrealistic shock, not quite believing it. It is an unfolding process, as I am finding.  Being a documentarian, I am called to write a lot about this, in spite of the feedback from two wonderful friends (both prolific writers) who have encouraged me to hold off and let this experience sink in, just for me. Hard to do, since writing is my medicine and I see this as a way to reach people with the vital message of self care.

Revelations coming through like (sodium free, cholesterol free, fat free….my new dietary guidelines:) popcorn. Went on an outing yesterday to run errands and then a wild night with my friend Ondreah Johnson who doubled as chauffer and private duty nurse, at Costco. Got all kinds of organic and GMO free goodies. It occurred to me in the face of my own health issues and now my friend Phil Garber who is in the hospital (he is my son’s Big Brother/go to guy), I have NO CONTROL over any of it. Imagine thinking that I did. I had a ‘conversation’ with my parents who are on the Other Side while meandering the aisles and leaning on the cart, feeling like I was way beyond my double nickels birthday. I said to my mother “I’m not you. I can’t do this.” She was everyone’s rock. I used to tell her “Rocks crumble.” She would also say that she could handle any crisis and then fall apart afterward. Funny, I never saw her fall apart. I suspect that she learned from my grandmother and I learned from her how to convince ourselves that we had to be available 24/7 for whatever need arose. She too had cardiac issues. I believe she died of broken heart from missing my dad who preceded her by 2 1/2 years.So the surrender piece. God/dess and I have been having confabs and I have been turning it all over and over and over. What else is there to do but that? I am trusting that all is well.


Previous Posts

Heaven On Earth
    "Imagine, will you....Heaven On Earth For Real." These are the words that are on my friend Tambra Harck's Facebook page. I think about it a lot since I believe that we create our own vision/version in our vivid imaginations. One of my favorite songs on the topic, sung by Ma

posted 9:47:47pm Aug. 26, 2014 | read full post »

With An Open Hand
  When you consider all of the things that you desire; from relationships to abundance, from faith to freedom, from possessions to passion, how do you hold them?  What I mean by that is this:  do you hold them with a closed fist; grasping, clinging as if for dear life or can you let go a b

posted 9:07:21pm Aug. 25, 2014 | read full post »

The Art of Surrender
On Saturday, I began my day in retrospective musing. Listening to Ellis Paul singing Dragonfly  on Sleepy Hollow  to greet the sun. Was reading earlier entries down my time line on Facebook and marveled at how far I have come since everything changed with the 'cardiac event' on June 12th. It was o

posted 10:31:49am Aug. 24, 2014 | read full post »

Disney Daring
  I am no longer a Disneyland virgin. Yesterday was my very first day in "The Happiest Place on Earth".  Earned my ears (although I didn't buy any(: Went on Soarin' Over California, Monsters, Inc, and then to earn street cred, had to up the amps and do California Scream, then Cars, then Thu

posted 11:02:37am Aug. 21, 2014 | read full post »

Dog Poop
Today at a staff meeting for my talented team of co-workers at my new job for Elements Behavioral Health, our CEO- Dr. David  Sack did a dazzling presentation, complete with Power Point. The topic?  Dog poop. He shared the story of the family four-legged, named Charlie who is a basset hound. He wa

posted 12:48:27am Aug. 20, 2014 | read full post »




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