The Bliss Blog

The Bliss Blog


Wake Me Up

 

I was listening to the radio on my way to one of my many jobs; this one working with folks in recovery from addictions. A song blasted on through my reverie as I was contemplating all of the tasks before me today. Rounding a curve on rural Route 152, in beautiful Bucks County, PA,  I heard  powerful and resonant words that I might as well have written.

“I tried carrying the weight of the world

But I only have two hands”

For as long as I can remember, I took it upon myself to fix, heal, cure or otherwise kiss boo boos and make them all better. As a child, I found ways to cheer people up and as an adult, have built my career around caregiving. All of those ‘alphabet soup letters’  before after my name point to that as a focus.  In my personal relationships, I have been a raving co-dependent, often not certain where I left off and they began and feeling like a failure if someone repeatedly fell and I couldn’t keep them sane and vertical.

When I began to realize that caregiving is optional and only by request, and not just because I have the skills to do it, the load started to lighten. Do I still offer help before I am beckoned?  Yes. Am I miffed if someone declines my guidance? Not any more. I have come to understand that the only person I truly have answers for is myself and sometimes I wonder about that. People ask to pick my brain (what’s left of it by the end of the day), quite often and I answer as I am able and if I don’t know, I research. It’s the Cosmic Concierge in me who has a huge file of resources. All I can do is deliver information, rather than  being overly concerned with whether or how they follow up. I used to live by the motto, “Everything I ever let go of had claw marks on it,” as if I was somehow responsible for what anyone did with the information I provided. Surrender and trust have become new watchwords.

I have also learned that time passes and I will always get older, but wisdom is what I choose to acquire by learning the lessons in that transition from youth to age.

 

“Wake Me Up”

Feeling my way through the darkness
Guided by a beating heart
I can’t tell where the journey will end
But I know where to start
They tell me I’m too young to understand
They say I’m caught up in a dream
Life will pass me by if I don’t open up my eyes
Well that’s fine by me

So wake me up when it’s all over
When I’m wiser and I’m older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn’t know I was lost
[x2]

I tried carrying the weight of the world
But I only have two hands
I hope I get the chance to travel the world
But I don’t have any plans
Wish that I could stay forever this young
Not afraid to close my eyes
Life’s a game made for everyone
And love is the prize

So wake me up when it’s all over
When I’m wiser and I’m older
All this time I was finding myself
And I didn’t know I was lost
[x2]

I didn’t know I was lost
I didn’t know I was lost
I didn’t know I was lost
I didn’t know I was lost

 

http://youtu.be/-Uk2O5Gxd6g Wake Me Up by Avicii ft. Aloe Blacc



Previous Posts

Turn Your Mess Into Your Message
Wise people are everywhere. Today I met a wise woman while waiting to see my cardiologist. She was the receptionist who greeted me from behind her sliding glass (slid open, of course) window.  When she asked how I was doing since my last visit and I gave her an update, she responded:  "You are tur

posted 10:01:15pm Sep. 19, 2014 | read full post »

Invulnerable and Invincible?
  Yesterday, in the midst of a radio interview with Kerri Kannan,  I was asked a question about vulnerability. It is a topic that has become as familiar as the fingers typing these words. I was awakened to it when viewing a TEDTalk by Brene' Brown a year or so ago. It doesn't come easily to

posted 10:24:20pm Sep. 18, 2014 | read full post »

The Now What Club
This morning, I joined two dear friends for brunch at Mal's Diner in Skippack, PA.  After a heart-healthy workout in cardiac rehab, I had a heart- happy  meal of egg whites, spinach (no cheese), fresh fruit instead of home fries and dry (no butter) whole grain toast. Yvonne Kaye has been my mentor

posted 10:10:09pm Sep. 16, 2014 | read full post »

Enjoy Every Moment
Feeling emotionally raw at the moment, having just returned from a day of honoring my friend Delane Lipka. I had written about another extraordinary day in a previous Beliefnet article called In the Garden of Eden that described a gathering of kindred spirits that had been organized by Delane. For d

posted 10:03:50pm Sep. 15, 2014 | read full post »

Cardia-versary
This morning marks 3 months since I experienced the kind of pain that cracks you open and has you revealing the emotional viscera that had long lay dormant. Literally at this moment, I was captured by the symptoms of a heart attack- searing heart burn pain, jaw tightness and wringing wet sweats. I s

posted 10:56:19am Sep. 12, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.