There isn’t a person on the planet who has escaped loss, challenge and change, since it is the nature of human existence. Nothing stays the same, impermanence is the name of the game. The question is “how do we face it?” Is it with grace and grit or whining and worrying? If we are conditioned with a particular mindset, then it is up to us to decide if we want to maintain it if it is serving us, or shift it if isn’t. There are three perspectives from which to view the world and its occurrences:
Victim- Feeling as if we are being ‘done to'; at the mercy of someone elses’ choices and behaviors. Blame and shame is the name of that particular game. While it is so, that there are some circumstances in which someone in power causes harm to those who are weaker and more vulnerable (such as child abuse), it is when a person recognizes that they have the power to change their circumstances and their beliefs, that they are able to transcend their victimhood.
Survivor: Characterized by a willingness to take that step away from limiting perspective; changing the story that may have had someone succumbing to their fears of how life ‘has to be the way it’s always been’ because that’s all they’ve known. Accompanying it is a sense that they are triumphing and moving forward. Taking responsibility for their feelings and perceptions. Often, I equate survivors with the flexibility of a willow tree that bends in the wind, rather than simply standing solid like an oak tree. I have physically witnessed a 50-60 foot tall oak tree topple in the midst of gusts, while surrounding willows remained when the tempest subsided.
Thriver: A winner’s perspective is a hallmark of this stage of evolution. Exhiliration that is contagious; since it is noticeable in the demeanor of this resilient one. They are able to gaze back and see how far they have come. Reaching out to others who may need encouragement and guiding them along feeds the collective soup pot of existence. Bill W. and Dr. Bob who established AA and Alex Scott (Alex’s Lemonade) are examples of such powerhouses who took misfortune and transmuted it into magic. Think about the numbers of people positively impacted by their decisions to step beyond victimhood.
I saw this term ‘rebel thriver’ on Facebook this morning and it so resonated with my intention to rebel against anything that holds my heart and soul hostage, including my old worn out beliefs that I can’t have what I want in my life. Although I am generally an opti-mystic who sees the world through the eyes of possibility, there are times when the black out curtains come down and I am sitting in a dark room that has me stumbling around, feeling my way through the shadows. I wonder what it is that has me facing these gremlins that sometimes howl their ‘not good enough’ litany. It is in coming up smack dab against them that has me stretching my resiliency muscles and exhibiting gracefully flowing willow-ways.
http://www.rebelthriver.wordpress.com Rebel Thriver
http://youtu.be/1Y38fOQ1Byc Resilience by Thomas Newman