The Bliss Blog

The Bliss Blog


Control Freak

Ever feel like your life is a roller coaster ride and some days all you can do is sit tight, buckle your seat belt and hang on? If you are like most people, the answer would be an unqualified YESSSSS~! 

Each day, we awaken to uncertainty; not knowing what awaits around the next corner. Things are constantly shifting and changing; the nature of life. My friend Jody Kessler has a song called No Solid Ground in which she sings about the idea that the sands are always shifting and that nothing lasts forever in the same form; the essence of Buddhist principles. At every turn, I have found, there is a choice to be made. Do I succumb to the ‘fates’ or take charge of my own response to them? 

While, according to my son, I can be a control freak at times, more often than not, I am letting go of the incessant need to control and instead, allow myself to go with the flow. I ask myself how much I really believe that a Divine Power/Energy has my back.  In 12 step parlance, the word God is translated to the acronym Good Orderly Direction. When I pay attention to the guidance, there is no need for me to control anything or anyone.

I question what it is that I truly can control and then I need to do it. I know that I am responsible for my thoughts, feelings and actions. While on the elliptical at the gym, I pondered this question. I decide how much I work out and for how long. I choose what to put into my body. I choose my attitude and intention for each day, not knowing what I might face at work on any given day, since it such an unpredictable setting. A Course In Miracles refers to miracles as “a shift in perception” and so I shift them moment by moment. Not always easy, but ultimately rewarding.

I live by the Serenity Prayer, written by Reinhold Niebuhr as well

 

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

And then there are times when I used a shorter version:  “It is what it is.”  My Mother had a Que Sera Sera attitude which served her until her final breath this past November 26th  “What will be, will be.” was her sage answer when asked what was happening with her at the end of her life.

I find that as frightening as it might feel, letting go into God gives me permission to relinquish the need to control and paradoxically, allows for better outcome, which is what I desire in the first place.  Why didn’t I think of that before?  Oh, right, I did, but then I forgot that I did; which is what I call ‘spiritual amnesia’ and then I have to remember it all over again. Kind of life that roller coaster ride; only this time, I am able to raise my hands above my head, rather than white knuckling it as I grab ahold of the safety bar….WHEEEE!

 

www.jodykessler.com

 

 



  • http://www.JoyofQuotes.com Marta

    Thanks for reminding me of the sillyness of thinking we’re in control. Life really is a roller coaster ride for all of us to enjoy. I find shifting my awareness into the idea of ‘flow’ is helpful. If I allow myself to go with the flow – I relax and enjoy the ride. If you’re interested in playing with creative possibilities join me and an adventurous tribe of inner-explorers setting off on an amazing journey this Saturday. It’s a free for all thing and you’re invited: http://tiny.ly/hB3H

    • http://www.liveinjoy.org Edie Weinstein, MSW, LSW

      Control is an illusion, in my book. <3 and it's highly over-rated, as much I like to hold onto it.

Previous Posts

The Gift of Vulnerability
A quote from one of my favorite books has set the stage for an ongoing process in my life. The Velveteen Rabbit is a tale of a little boy whose toys dispense wisdom to each other,  the child and the reader of this classic. The rabbit, who is a bit insecure and wondering if the tot will favor him, a

posted 10:17:06am Jan. 26, 2015 | read full post »

On the Elevator
  Yesterday I received a surprise in the mail. It was a tiny pocket sized book called Back To Joy that was compiled by author June Cotner. It contains tidbits of wisdom from the likes of Anne Lamott, John Welwood, Winston Churchill, Helen Keller, Rachel Carson, Og Mandino and someone else wh

posted 9:26:51pm Jan. 24, 2015 | read full post »

Wabi Sabi Walls
    The Japanese concept of Wabi Sabi is defined in Wikipedia as: " A comprehensive  Japanese world view or aesthetic centered on the acceptance of transience and imperfection. The aesthetic is sometimes described as one of beauty that is "imperfect, impermanent, and incomplete".

posted 9:31:09pm Jan. 23, 2015 | read full post »

Clothes Make The Man
As I was speaking with a client today, we were discussing ways that people learn who they are and how they re-create themselves when major life changes occur. I remembered a scene from one of my favorite films:  Joe vs. the Volcano. Tom Hanks plays Joe Banks who  has a dreary, gray life, with pre

posted 10:22:22pm Jan. 21, 2015 | read full post »

Changing Your Mind About God
I was listening to an  NPR interview today with author Scott Chesire whose initial book  is called High As the Horses’ Bridles, which is a reference to an image connected with Armageddon. It is a novel, but in part, is based on his own experience as a Jehovah's Witness. In his conversation

posted 10:18:52pm Jan. 19, 2015 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.