Beyond Blue

Beyond Blue

Therapy Thursday: Buy the Tootsie Rolls

pocket therapist front cover small.jpgI have decided to dedicate a post on Thursday to therapy, and offer you the many tips I have learned on the couch. They will be a good reminder for me, as well, of something small I can concentrate on. Many of them are published in my book, “The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Kit.

My therapist keeps a large bowl of tootsie rolls on the table between my couch and her chair. I usually treat myself to two or three on the way out, because sometimes our sessions feel like I’ve just climbed Mt. Everest, or at least burned off 600 calories.


“You must really like tootsie rolls,” I said to her the other day upon leaving.

“No, I don’t,” she responded, “that’s why I buy them. Now if I bought Reese’s cups, I’d be in trouble.”

I always knew she was smart, my therapist, but that logic put her up there with Albert Einstein and Thomas Edison.

For me, buying tootsie rolls means avoiding people, places, and things that will trigger my competitiveness and manic streak … especially workaholics and overachievers. Because I will try to keep up with them, even as I’m out of breath.

Then I crash. My family has to pick up the pieces, which puts me in the doghouse. And too many nights in the doghouse leads to depression and anxiety.

For that reason, I don’t open an important file that is sent to me every Monday morning containing my blog traffic numbers, which of my posts were most popular, which sites are linking to me, and which key terms generate the most traffic. I’m sure it’s all interesting stuff, but I can’t go there … it’s a big Reece’s cup.

  • Sarah Callender

    Oh, how I love this post! I was just asking myself, why oh why did I buy all the Halloween candy that I LOVE when I know we hardly get any trick-or-treaters?!?

    We all have triggers that send us spinning (especially those of us with “fragile wiring”). While I have been told that “all writers need to be active on Twitter,” I know that engaging in that world of snippety social media will only agitate my sensitive brain. Gosh, even thinking about Twitter makes me feel twizzy.

    Thank you, as always, Therese.

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Tess

    The past is my Reese’s cups. Whenever I look back, I can’t go forward. Thanks for these homey stories;they put everything in much better context than technical explanations. And thank you for being so open about your own struggles. It certainly gives me comfort and helps me take firmer steps toward my goals.

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Jeanne

    Even though youmay not see this – there is so much wisdom in this post. Thank you!

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment liz

    My reeses cup is the imbalance between being overly -responsible for my son and underly- responsible for myself. I get my friends and family involved in my affairs and too often I take their advice over my own inner-wisdom. What happens then is, I become a victim who needs rescuing.

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment sharon

    Hi therese I just recently started reading your column. It’s great that you write this if just to encourage others who have been there. Thanks

  • http://AddaURLtothiscomment Stella

    I just finished reading your book, “Beyond Blue,” and found much there of value to lift my spirits. Truth: I had not heard of you or this blog before I stumbled on your book on Amazon and ordered the book. Brava! Thanks for your honesty and insights.

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