Beyond Blue

Beyond Blue


How to Pray When You’re Depressed

posted by Beyond Blue

woman praying.jpgWhen I was in the eye of depression’s storm, I couldn’t pray. I would go into my bedroom closet, shut the door, and light a candle in the dark. I stared into its flame, wanting so badly to feel at peace.

 

But I didn’t. Instead, I trembled with anxiety, barely able to hold my rosary made of rose petals. I pleaded with God to send me a minute of consolation, to show me that He was there. I got nada.

”Be persistent,” a Buddhist friend told me. ”Meditation takes patience and discipline. When the distracting thoughts come, acknowledge them and then let them go. If you do this over and over again, you will begin to transcend.”

But it never happened. So on top of my depression and anxiety, I felt like a prayer loser.

Maybe I was relying too heavily on my patron saint as a spiritual guide, because St. Therese of Lisieux used to fall asleep during prayer, and she grew distracted from her prayers all the time. She rarely received consolation. ”Saying the rosary takes it out of me more than any hair-shirt would,” she wrote. ”I do say it so badly! Try as I will to put force on myself, I can’t meditate on the mysteries of the rosary; I just can’t fix my mind on them.”

The only way I have been able to pray for longer than 45 seconds is to converse with God as I run my five-mile route around the Naval Academy.

I first pray a novena to St. Therese: ”St. Therese, the Little Flower, please pick me a rose from the heavenly garden and send it to me with a message of love. Ask God to grant me the favor I thee implore (my intention is to find peace), and tell Him I will love Him more and more.” I follow that prayer with five Our Fathers, five Hail Marys, and five Glory Be’s. Then I say the prayer of St. Francis: ”Lord, make me an instrument of your peace….” And if I haven’t run out of oxygen yet, I’ll finish my aerobic/spiritual workout with a favorite prayer from Thomas Merton and the Memorare, an intercessory prayer to Mary.

By the time my sweaty body makes it back home, my soul has worked out too, so I only need to go into my closet for a pair of jeans.

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  • Sharon A. Kattke

    Understanding the situation that you were in is not hard for me. I can relate to the depression/anxiety dillema. The meditation that I perform daily is Kriya Yoga. Self-Realization Fellowship teaches its students a yogic lifestyle. After completing my kriyas, I see the spiritual eye and find myself melting into an ocean of light. For a few moments, I enjoy. Please go to: http://www.yogananda.com

  • Cathy

    I, too, fall asleep when saying the rosary. I’ve been plagued with severe morning anxiety since my unfortunate 7-year bout with Paxil and the subsequent two-year withdrawal. Actually little of the heavy depression and anxiety that I now suffer, courtesy of one of these wonder drugs, has gone away. Each day is a major challenge just to live. My rosary is what I grab in the early morning hours when the terrors come marching in but, like St. Therese, I feel I say it badly. I doze off while saying it and meditating on the mysteries is not something that’s easy to do. But whatever the problems I have with saying the rosary it would be hard for me to get out of bed without saying it — go figure! When I was going through the worst of the worst aspects of SSRI withdrawal — akathesia and complete insomnia, four months of this — I would say Hail Mary after Hail Mary and I would get some peace and sometimes even an hour of sleep before I would wake up trembling and suicidal again.
    I talk to God informally, too. I hope someday to memorize the Prayer of St. Francis, so I can say this on my morning walks. I have finally memorized the entire Serenity Prayer, which does give me comfort. Like a lot of people I discovered this prayer through going to al-anon and then discovered the whole prayer, which is very comforting. I say the Prayer for Protection every morning when I start my walk, for myself and my son, who is the alcoholic (and the reason my brainless GP doc recommended Paxil) and the reason why I am now in al-anon, something that should have been recommended by my doc instead of a drug. The spirituality of this program not only helps with the alcoholism but has been one of my lifelines in my SSRI withdrawal — three meetings a week.
    I’d love to know what it’s really like to be able to clear the mind and really meditate. I haven’t figured that one out, either. Patience and discipline — yes, I’m not good at this, but I’m working on it.
    Thank you for this post. I identified a lot with it. I’m sorry to bring up the Paxil again, but I never experienced severe depression, anxiety or thoughts of suicide until I shook hands with this nasty little drug. Now it rules my life and I’m struggling very hard to get my life, or a life, back.

  • ilibertyi

    I rememeber the verse fromthe bible…pray without ceasing…and I don’t say any formal prayers usually…usually it’s an on-going conversation with God..in the shower, inthe car…as I eat lunch…hopefully in my rising up and lying down, my going in and coming out….prayer is fellowship and I think any time at all that you can spend in conversation and prayer is valuable and worthy.

  • Esruon

    Depression has been my major mode of operating since I was in
    middle school and it’s been a struggle, to be sure, to step away
    from its ruination of various aspects of my life.
    But, since I have been in Gestalt therapy, I’ve gotten a much
    better grip on what makes me tick, what my triggers are,
    and what settings need changing.
    It’s only taken me 18 years but it’s better than never.
    If I had a medication that was making me worse, I would
    call for help on the medical side. In fact, I have had that
    problem and I did go to several M.D.s before I found one who
    worked with me on my depression and how it presented itself.
    I tried several medications but am now on one, only one, and
    I have hopes to wean myself off of it this year.
    I wish you well with your struggle and I hope that
    you will get your life back up to working ahead and
    feeling good about it.
    I know it’s tough.
    Esruon

  • Tmat

    Nice illustration about the candle lighting.
    I too struggle with depression and find prayer difficult. Losing hope feels so sinful to me, and I deeply desire to overcome it.
    Some things I do are to repeat the words Jesus I trust in You from the Divine Mercy (In Polish, Jezu Ufam Tobie) and just try to rest in that. He is God, after all…… but the depression overwhelms me sometimes.
    Rituals do help. I wear a special rock that a Native friend gave me that reminds me that I am unique, that God made me and loves me uniquely. I also find being in nature neccesary.
    So many Saints and Holy people have suffered. That gives me comfort too.
    I still hate being plagued by my sensitive soul. The restlessness, the lonliness and the pain of seeing so much beauty contrasted with so much horror just tears me up. I feel everything so accutely…….It takes up a lot of energy…….ditto on the impractical poet!

  • ed pinkham

    first of all, i’m very dpressed and stuggling with family issues
    please pray for financial blessings, i am unemployed and disabled. i haven’t been approved yet for unemployment or ssaocial security,
    my rent and bills are piling uo and i have no way to pay thm.
    i just got saved and baptized today and i’m really leaning on jesus foer support. please agree with me in pray that my unemployment and ssa will get approved before my bills due dates
    thank you,
    ed pinkham

  • M.A.

    I, too, have struggled with prayer. The more I plan it out or try to make it formal, the less it seems to work. Like ilibertyi (from comment above), I find the informal prayers to be most effective – the constant conversations with God. These conversations are not always holy. Sometimes I am angry, and I ask God why it seems He (or She?) hates me. Other times I feel so blessed, I am able to offer a prayer of gratitude without being distracted. Mostly, though, with depression, my spirituality sufferes greatly. I am unable to see the point of so much suffering – not just my own suffering, but those around me. The thing that has helped me the most with prayer is trying to recognize miracles every day and acknowledge them in prayer. When I am able to do this sincerely, it is the most hopeful practice in my life.

  • http://gypsyteacher.wordpress.com/ Sharon

    Last night actually I was having this issue. I find that praying while you’re depressed only asks you to look at the more negative aspects of your life, and it’s the one time you feel that God isn’t listening. Reminding myself that God has given me so many wonderful things to look forward to, so many things to make me feel good about myself, starting out look at the small good helped me remember that in the bigger picture- I was still wanted. I was still cared for and remembered by God and he was always there for me then, why wouldn’t he be there for me when I was down?
    God will help you feel precious and accepted with however you feel most comfortable, because his love especially can sometimes feel overwhelming or like there is never enough. If running helps you feel close to God then he and his angels will run with you.

  • Jeannine

    If we can attach our sufferings with those of Jesus for the salvation of the whole world, we can find “value” in it. Suffering can be a gift to us, if we can find the power in it to help others and to atone for our own sins.
    Also, if you think about wallowing in your personal sufferings, how selfish is that? You could be up and about doing good deeds; but instead, the devil keeps you debilitated right where he wants you–out of the way.

  • Linda

    I totally understand about the spiritual and aerobic exercises. I pray each and every morning to St. Rita, Helper of the Hopelss, and St. Mary stating that God is never changing. This to is difficult for me. When saying certain psalms such as “God Make Me An Instrument of Your Peace and also asking the angels to lift me up so my foot does not hit a stone, It does give me peace. Sometimes, it is difficult to believe and accept this. I constantly pray, every morning and every night, asking foregiveness for all those I have hurt in anyway.
    Thank you for your submission to this article.
    Lin

  • Anne

    Why pray to Saints? Our Lord and Savior, Jesus, died so that we may be saved and pray directly to Our God in the name of Jesus, not some “saint” that has been dead for years! My Lord Jesus is ALIVE! I have been told that you pray to saints because they “understand” your problems and can present them to God on your behalf. My God knows and understands my problems, I don’t need a saint to explain on my behalf. If you want to recite a prayer, try the Lord’s Prayer, it is a proven winner. And while you are at it, ask that God’s will be done. After all, God is perfect, He cannot err!

  • http://www.contemplativeoutreach.org/site/PageServer?pagename=about_practices_centering Melissa

    I can so relate to this article. While depressed, I could not read prayers or even participate in church the way I used to. It all felt empty. The only thing that helped was Centering Prayer, a Christian form of meditation where you focus on a word and let your mind be empty for God. Since I felt empty anyway, the prayer worked great. It’s the only way I found to pray while depressed that actually worked for me. It also got me some socialization, as I did it with a group. I highly recommend Centering Prayer for anyone struggling with depression yearning to share the numbing emptiness with God.

  • Sheilah

    I go the informal route. Life has so many distractions and sometimes it’s hard not to have your mind wander in the middle of a specific prayer, especially if it’s repeated over and over again. I don’t find myself listening to what I’m saying but just ramble off words. It shouldn’t happen but it does. A few weeks ago before mass I found myself making the sign of the cross and saying 1 – 2 – 3 – 4 instead of In the name of the Father, etc. I really felt bad and wondered what was happening in my mind that made me do that. I get much more out of talking to God in general and together we work through a lot.

  • http://www.biblegateway.com Autumn

    Do you see a nugget of truth in these posts? I do. It is when each person actually spends time conversing with God, that they notice the difference. God wants a relationship with us, not some canned prayers that someone else made up hundreds of years ago. You would never talk like that to your spouse or friends or anyone. Who ever goes around reciting memorized requests? You would be thought of as nuts. Yet people do it all the time to God and then wonder why they get “nada.”
    One of my favorite Bible verses is of Jesus speaking these wonderful words of comfort:
    28″Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (You can find that in the book of Matthew, chapter 11, verses 28-31 in the Holy Bible.)
    Come to Jesus. He loves you so much and is waiting for you to respond to Him!

  • Cherie

    RE: Anne’s post:
    Let me just add….. Amen! AMEN!!
    Anne
    June 30, 2010 10:10 AM
    Why pray to Saints? Our Lord and Savior, Jesus, died so that we may be saved and pray directly to Our God in the name of Jesus, not some “saint” that has been dead for years! My Lord Jesus is ALIVE! I have been told that you pray to saints because they “understand” your problems and can present them to God on your behalf. My God knows and understands my problems, I don’t need a saint to explain on my behalf. If you want to recite a prayer, try the Lord’s Prayer, it is a proven winner. And while you are at it, ask that God’s will be done. After all, God is perfect, He cannot err!

  • http://www.myspace.com/celineaus Debrah

    I agree with what some people have said. Saying the rosary can be very trying because it’s so repetitive and I could never understand why it’s so important. As was said earlier, focus on just talking to the person you want to talk with. Jesus said, “no one comes to the Father except through Me…” (or something like that). The Virgin Mary has held an important place in my life ever since she answered an important question I had years ago. Not in words, of course, but from the depths of my soul I suddenly knew the answer, and I knew it came from her. I have kept her close to me ever since. It’s true that, if you ask Mary for help, to intercede on your behalf with her divine Son, you will have an answer. It may not be what you want, but you will be answered. God has paved our way for a reason, though it sometimes doesn’t seem like it. (As for the question I asked her, it had to do with a man that I loved many years ago, and I wasn’t sure how he felt. I’d flown across a few states to visit him, then got cold feet. Should I go see him, or not? I struggled with this and asked Mary what I should do. The answer was…go see him. I did and it was the most wonderful evening of my life. He and I weren’t meant to be together in this life, but God knew of my heartache and let me have that time with him.) The moral of the story is…reach out to God with all your heart, and He’ll reach right back to you.

  • http://www.renegadewizard.com Renegade Wizard

    One of the best things you can do for depression is watch subliminal technology. By prayer you are virtually changing your mental thoughts patterns over time. This is the same thing that happens when you watch or listen to subliminal reprogramming only it can happen much quicker.
    Here is the Renegade Wizard way to quickly change your mind set out of depression. A high doze of subliminal watching deeep breathing exercise preferably outside plus some very healthy nutritous food and being with upbeat positive people. One other thing is my 70×7 exercise which is out of the bible. You can download the book with a 30 day trial to my membrship site http://www.renegadewizard.com

  • http://talkwiththelord.blogspot.com/ G HUBBARD

    May I suggest one way to seek the Lords help in times of depression…it is easy and available 24/7/52 per year…just ask Him a question relevent to your specific needs.This will open a meaningful dialogue where you can in confidence let your hair down.With our free to all program, we inspire all to talk with the Lord daily about everyday living concerns. for free info and copy of our song lyrics g. hubbard p.o., box 2232 ponte vedra fl 32004 many posts on our blog http://talkwiththelord.blogspot.com/

  • Annie Young

    Annie
    pj777storm@yahoo.com
    When we pray, we must believe according to GOD’S word that HE heareth us and will answer us. GOD answers prayers based on action. Both FAITH and BELIEF are action words. We must beleive the impossible, the things that we cannot see. We must everyday pray according to his word for every problems we face in our lives. There “is” an answer and a solution in HIS WORD. Believe or not. I believe that prayers are answered when we commit to JEHOVAH’S WILL by establishing a covenant (relationship) with HIM. JESUS CHRIST hath said, “Faith without works is dead alone, show me faith without works and I will show you MY FAITH by MY WORKS”. Lastly, once we realized that we have a choice and that we are “only” influence by the power of darkness. It’s all about mind over matters and JESUS conquered it all and so can we.

  • william jarrett

    God is good and all the time. I speak for my self, He have been good to me I just cant count the blessing I have had and thy just keep on coming what im trying to say is (TRY GOD)

  • http://www.thinkpoint.wordpress.com Steve Cornell

    Another helpful study for overcoming Discouragement:
    http://thinkpoint.wordpress.com/2009/01/14/overcoming-discouragement-2/

  • http://depresson maxwy eaton

    I do love God and belive but I have a kud that is going to put me in the nut house and I need to meet some one so that I will not be all alone this would help but sence I have gave up all of the bad stuff I was doing it is hard tomeet some one pleas pray that this will happen
    G o has anwser all of my prays but theas two pleas help me pray to pray for his help Max

  • avery

    god works in mysterious ways i know their is a higher calliing among the spirtual realm of belief god is good to us all that accept his mercy and understand his chastening god will parable things among our life that sometimes we can not understand why these things are occuring in our lifes it is said to the in thine on heart that we are the church the dwelled in our hearts and we carry gods breath every where we go so to wrap up what im saying keep faith in even a time in need but mainly when you are not cause just might cause the good lord just have revealed what is instored for us all and you may the lord keep us all forever amen god bless all

  • Joanna

    I’ve had a really hard time accepting my “lifes situation” as i call it. My boys dad has been incarcerated since 08. I moved back home into my parents house. I hated getting out of bed and would only to get what ever my boys wanted. I had to help myself through my depression thinking no one would understand what i was going through. My parents just left me alone. At times all i wanted was a big hug and one of them to tell me things will be ok. I even stoped praying because it seemed like God wasn’t listening. I sometimes wished i just wouldn’t wake up. But looking at my boys i knew they needed me and that they would love me no matter what. I started praying again and telling my self with God i can get through this. I have had hard times before but this really brought me down. I have made prayer a must every day. I pray every morning before i start anything. I have more joy in my life now i got a good job that will hopefully turn permanant full time. I know that no matter what God has always been with me even when i stopped praying. I made it this far because of God. If God brought you to it He will get you through it. May God Bless each and every one of us and may Jesus light shine in our hearts Forever.

  • angela

    I’m not very good with this typeing stuff but I will say this befor i was so depressed I felt like I could not pray for a long time I couldn’t even think but I can say that now I have found much much peace when I pray with someone it started with my dog I know it sounds crazy he looked in my eyes n he prayed with me when I cryed he cryed then I started praying on my own I pray all throughout my day every day as soon as I get a bad thought I simply say lord help me and I talk to him just like he’s my husband or mother, father,sis,ect he has really been my BFF before I got sick seriously I did not know what to do I thought there was no fixing my fear my terrors then I made my self overdose on gods love literally I need it every day.

  • Kevin

    My prayer is, that God’s Amazing Grace will cover this issue.
    1. Watch over me during this crisis.
    2. Heal me from this issue.
    3. Reconcile my marriage and family back.
    4. Watch over my Father who is dying of stage three cancer.
    My Prayer during this time of Depression: Transformation
    I don’t know if this story is even worthy to be reviewed by this christian blog. Besides the possibility of being printed in some format. The story is true and factual. Its a tragedy that has nowhere to go but upwards. This issue at hand has affected several Combat Veterans including myself, from WWII to OIF / OEF. There is help out there through the Veterans Administration.
    Combat Veterans and Anger Management
    I am writing this article for all my fellow Veterans. As a Christian who is going through this difficult task, I feel I am obligated to share this with my fellow Veterans. Some may read and think this article is written out of weakness. That’s a mood point, because this article deals with real life issues and the help available from the VA. This article is written on behalf of all our faithful Veterans. Especially, to those who have served our nation in wartime. The piece is written to make aware what help our Veterans Administration Hospitals truly provide in areas of Post Traumatic Stress and combat related counseling. I personally have always been a skeptic when it came to dealing with the Veterans Administration Hospital System. Even though I have utilized their medical care throughout the years. A recent crisis struck home and I came to fruition that the VA does really care and wants to help. They are professionals and understand Veterans issues. They are experts in fields of combat stress and anger-management issues caused by combat related problems. They are there for the support concerning all counseling issues. Even those that might have existed prior to joining the military or had been enhanced due to a combat related experience. The VA system is prepared to meet the needs and concerns when it comes to counseling and supporting those that have experienced trauma due to their combat military service. I am writing this in awe, to say thank you to the Veterans Administration for being there for me in this crisis. I was always to ashamed to admit my fears and concerns out of pure pride. I have bottled up my anger-management issues for years. I was to afraid to seek the real help I always needed. Why one may ask? Ignorance, pride? Both could be the answer. I am writing my fellow Veterans this, in a two-fold breakdown. One, never estimate the help our Veterans Administration Hospitals can offer. Two, don’t assume as I did, that one can overcome the issue by themselves. I am caught up in the second tier.
    Some say I am an educated man. One who should know better. One who had specialized training to know what support systems the VA offers. I hold a Master Degree from an ATS / regional accredited Seminary in Kentucky and a Bachelors and Associate Degree from a Regional Accredited University / Community College in Ohio. The answer is, I did not. Instead, I was not the Christian Husband, Father, Army Reserve Chaplain, Pastor and Man I should of been. I should have sought out the needed support for my combat related issue(s) long ago. Way before I was married in the 1990?’s. But refused.
    A few days before this past 2010 Christmas, my family left me due to my anger management issues. I have seen anger-management turn my life totally upside down. I have seen it ruin relationships, cause problems in my ministry and bring crisis to my own walk in life. The issue has caused financial struggles, personal struggles, and spiritual struggles within my life. Especially, my spiritual walk. I deployed recently over five years from 1999-thru-2008 as an Army Chaplain. In Desert Storm I served in Field Artillery as an enlisted NCO. During many deployments and mobilizations, I have helped many with the same like issues as an Army Reserve Chaplain on active duty deployments. My problem was, that I was just to afraid to admit and seek counseling for myself, due to being an Army Care Giver and Commissioned Officer. In 2008, my family left me due to the same issues. I reached out to a well known church within the Ross County, Ohio Community. The Pastor had previous Vietnam Combat experience himself. I thought to myself, here we go, I was finally prepared to sit down with someone and share my issues that he might be able to relate and offer true direction from his past experiences. Instead, I was referred to an elderly assistant pastor by him who had the best intentions but really did not understand where I was at the time and what I was going through. I was also seeing a VA counselor at the same time, but was to ashamed to open up and share all my issues at hand. After a few months and being given the feeling that the senior pastor who had served in combat was not interested in me, I just gave up. One faithful member of that church tried to keep me focused, by partaking in the local men’s prayer groups within the community. He was a true mentor who I believe was walking his faith. This gentlemen is well respected and owns a Christian business in the local area. In the long run, I left, feeling I was not worthy to be accepted or talked to by the senior pastor. Selfish and ignorant on my part, but true.
    I am not seeking sympathy or compassion concerning this written article. You see, I had to hit rock bottom this time before I realized I needed to get help for my combat related issues and become whole for myself. I had to truly seek God in all of this. I was tired of the hurt, denial, emotions, rejection, ruined relationships, and the blame game. In the process, I have lost my family, my home and my dignity. Through this, I became homeless due to my prior in action. I have come to the conclusion, no matter what, I am at fault and take full responsibility for my failure to seek the actual support needed in my life years ago. Two weeks ago I started the process to become whole, seeking transformation for the first time in my life, with the help of the Veterans Administration Hospital and their staff. I have started individual professional counseling and entered group therapy. I have put my pride aside, accepting medical support for my issue as well. In these three weeks, that I have spent away from my family, I have also drawn closer in my faith for the first time in 15 years. I have reached out to two wonderful Christian ministers in the area. One minister I have known for years and the other I have respected over the past decade for his stature within the community. I also received ministry guidance from an Episcopal Priest in our local Ross County, Ohio area. She called me this past weekend after reading a prayer request that I forwarded her in an e-mail. Funny, but out the few ministers I knew in the local area and had e-mailed the same prayer request, the Episcopal Priest who I had never met, was the only minister who responded through the presence of ministry.
    What I am trying to convey to all my Veteran colleagues that might be having the same type of issues is this. Its never to late. This is an earnest and forthright account. Don’t follow the example in desperation, but one of inspiration. If one needs support due to anger-management issues that are curtailed to combat related problems, go and get the help needed. I say this, especially to those that are married and have families. Today, I have only talked to my children a few times via the telephone. That part has crushed me. Due to my insistence and pride, I thought I could handle my combat related issues on my own. I was wrong. By my in actions to seek help, I failed myself and those who depended on me. Especially my loved ones, my family. My prayer is this, that the message will strike the hearts of those Veterans and their families that might be experiencing the same situations in their life right now. My hope is, they will act to seek the support needed. Don’t be ashamed, don’t be embarrassed.
    I have struggled with my anger triggers related to combat issues for almost 20 years, since Desert Storm. Serving as an Army Reserve Chaplain and being mobilized, opened some of those issues back up while deployed. I have seen several little children die in Honduras and El Salvador due to car accidents and disease at a site I was posted at a few years back. I was on the scene with two Air Force Officers, they both were killed in Honduras in a traffic accident. One was a single mother who was bragging about her children just minutes prior to leaving the compound and then dying in an accident. As I looked at their mangled bodies in the make-shift morgue, I thought back to those in Iraq that were dead during Desert Storm and then wondered, what will become of the Female Officers children who had just died in the accident? I have seen Soldiers returning home from Iraq and Afghanistan commit suicide. Over several issues. Divorce, their Army Career being cut short due to combat injuries, PTSD, etc, etc. One was an outstanding Soldier that no one ever expected to carry out such an act. He blew his head off with a shot gun at Ft. Sill, OK. While serving in Desert Storm, I saw what destruction Field Artillery White Phosphorus Shells could do. Especially to the human body, burning Iraqi Soldiers to death as they were retreating back into Iraq from Kuwait. I saw the destruction of humanity with women and children that had been killed by Iraqi Soldiers. That is one part for my calling into ministry, so that I could be a person of peace and serve God in love.
    Right now I see nothing in my life but despair. I have almost given up hope at times, but with that stated, I know somewhere, somehow, God is in the midst of all of this mess that I have created. Maybe I am just being to hard on myself. I know I am just a mere mortal subject to the ? IMPRINTING ? of war. Nothing new about that within the military community. Especially, those that have served in combat. I do have the insight as to what path to follow, while painful now, I hope to find SERENITY, maybe even happiness, at least that is what I have promised God. I will continue to tap my spiritual entity and try not wavier. I know I must continue to listen to the CENTER of my heart. That is, to become whole. I pray in some means, God will hear my prayer to be healed and deliver me. I also pray that God will reconcile my marriage and family through all this despair. That part I am not to sure about. But at least that is my hope and prayer. Who knows? Maybe one day, God will utilize me to support Veterans by some means, sharing my story and offering a way to overcome their Combat Trauma.
    By my in actions, I let the only ones that truly loved me, down in life. My message to the married Veterans is this, there is nothing on this planet that can take the place of a precious family. The VA is there and prepared to do their part to assist and support those in crisis and need. Don’t be one of in action, but rather one of action.
    In closing, I don’t know how all of this is going to turn out, but I pray God gives me the strength to walk forward and be healed from my anger management. Guiding me through this despair, giving me coping skills and tools to overcome these issues. I pray that the Holy Spirit will offer wisdom when I am seeking. I pray that Christ will help carry the load, when I can no longer on this journey I have before me.
    The difficult part in all this is, I have lost my wife and children. Today I have been separated from them for almost four weeks. I ask those of the faith to keep all Veterans going through this issue in their prayers. I pray that Gods peace will pass all understanding in my life’s situation.
    In closing, I don’t know how all of this is going to turn out, but I pray God gives me the strength to walk forward and be healed from my anger management. Guiding me through this despair, giving me coping skills and tools to overcome these issues. I pray that the Holy Spirit will offer wisdom when I am seeking. I pray that Christ will help carry the load, when I can no longer on this journey I have before me.
    Respectfully in Christ+
    Kevin B. Compston, CH(CPT) USAR Retired
    A Desert Storm Combat Veteran

  • Darla Success

    It seems hat life has thrown me out on my head. My husband of twenty-eight years left me then waited and file a dervoice fromme. I am strong because it did not kill me. My family and God ment the world too me but I needed to put God first. It is hard and i have to move out iof my home with know where to go. Thank you God for keeping me and my son to get through this.

  • http://www.Facebook.com Amanda

    I was crushed when my lover of three years left to be with another man. I cried and sobbed every day, until it got so bad that I reached out to the Internet for help. I threw away so much money – all for nothing – until I hit on the real thing. And that is Dr saviour . You were different from all the rest – you are the diamond in the rough. Thank you from the depths of my soul! I am extremely happy now. I hope God blesses you as much as He has blessed me Dr saviour you are God sent i must say. i will recommend you to the whole world if i can Dr saviour ,if you need help contact him on drsaviourtemple@dr.com
    Posted by. miss amanda

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