I loved this blog post by my therapist friend, Elvira Aletta, because I so related to it. As I told her, on my insecure days I don’t read my comments, especially on the Huffington Post, after my sex post provoked almost 761 nasty remarks.
And maybe this is why I love Elvira’s writing. She is real. She throws out her insecurities for the masses to judge. And some do. Harshly. But I’m glad she’s going to keep on writing, despite the negativity that can so easily tempt you to be artificial and saccarine, to pick up the mask, and never let anyone see you for who you are.
You can get to Elvira’s post, “Getting Real: Facing the Greatest Fear,” by clicking here. I have excerpted from it below.
Unexpectedly I faced one of my greatest fears yesterday. Of course it would be Halloween.
Feeling bouncy and full of myself I decided on a whim to publish the article I wrote about my name and Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, on PsychCentral. Something light for Halloween, I thought.
After the article was posted I went about my business. Later, when I checked on it again, my blood ran cold. Someone left a not-so-nice comment:
“Would you like cheese with your whine?”
Ouch. Well gee, I guess I could see someone looking at it that way. I let it go. Comments that aren’t positive is part of the blogging territory, part of being “out there.” I went back to work. Two hours later I peeked again, another comment, this one stopped me in my tracks:
Oh, boy. Now what do I do? Take down the post? Leave it and see what happens? Did I make a terrible mistake that was bound to destroy my reputation? Who did I think I was anyway?
Can you smell the panic?
I tried to breathe. It helped but my heart was still beating too fast. I drank a cool glass of water. Better. Quickly I texted a cry for help to my editor, Steve, and then drove home.
When I walked into my house I smelled the delicious aroma of dinner. My husband, who was cooking, greeted me, quickly followed by my daughter and my dog. Gratitude washed over me.
You may think I’m exaggerating this whole thing, it seems so silly, but these were my genuine feelings.
The tag line up on my flag head says “for those with courageous hearts but with thin skins,” because I suspect many of us who deal with anxiety and depression feel just like that. Never do I want this blog to be a vanity project. My mission is to help people be resilient, not just temporarily happy. Everyone deserves to feel strong and confident no matter what life brings, to know they can deal with anything and thrive. In order to do this effectively I fully admit, I’m not just a teacher, I’m also a student.