Beyond Blue

Beyond Blue


The Depression Dialogue with Spouses

posted by Beyond Blue

James at “Finding Optimism” is devoting several posts to this specific topic because of all of your feedback to his great post “12 Ways to Care for Someone with Depression” and “Things to Say to Someone with Depression.” His wife, Anna, has written some excellent pieces that I am sure will help the mates of us bipolars and depressives. This is the type of stuff reader JCH (who asked the question on my previous post) might want to print out and hand to her husband. Good job James and Anna! Thank you!
Here is the first post in the series, called “The Depression Dialogue“:

It’s really hard being a carer when all you want to be is a wife, husband, partner, or friend. It’s important to have strategies to deal with different situations and remain in your normal relationship as much as possible. This is what I want to work through in these posts.
I’ve learned over time that James and I can relate to each other in a rational manner even when he is ill. This has been a learning process; it hasn’t always been the case. And I still often feel like I’m walking on egg shells depending on the severity of the episode.
The key strategy that I’ve learned is how to talk to James when he is sick, either high or low. When he becomes ill he turns into a different person. I say goodbye to my husband, so to speak, and hello to bipolar James. In a depressive episode he becomes highly irritable and usually itches for a fight. Early on he will often make comments to bait me. “All I do is work, work, work, to support your lifestyle and your precious social group.” You can imagine what a red rag to a bull that comment is.
At this point I have 2 options:
1. Take the bait, have a messy fight and accelerate his downswing, or
2. Grit my teeth and say “it’s the illness speaking”. If I can do that then I have a much better chance of diffusing the situation. A comment like “You sound stressed about work – let’s talk” has better results and sometimes can even stop the mood swing.
Lately I’ve also been able to say “Let’s talk before you get stuck in a negative cycle of thinking.” This is huge progress for us. It usually results in a fairly sensible conversation.
James says some very hurtful things to me when he’s depressed, but I only tell him how he’s hurt me when he’s better. I wait until he is rational and can deal with it, rather than inflame the situation further when he is ill. I’ve also learned not to take his bait so personally, as I’ve come to recognize it for what it is.
It’s important to know that I couldn’t do this if I didn’t recognize the start of a mood swing. You need to listen to what is really being said before you reply to comments. Is the person sick? Are they really asking for help? Is this a normally held opinion? A few seconds of thought can save a lot of heartbreak.
Next time I can get on the computer I’ll write on learning about the illness and recognizing early symptoms.



  • jch

    Thanks Therese!! I actually sent her 1st post to my husband that day and will encourage him to continue reading her posts!
    I was able to get away this past weekend to visit family and the time apart to reflect on our marriage was very good for us.
    Things have been better but I do hope that we can take this time to see what the things are that “work” to help keep from getting into those downward spirals later!
    Thank you so much for your service to all of us out here! Your posts are a constant encouragement to me!

  • Margaret Balyeat

    Annasounds like she is cut from the same miraculous clorh as T’s Eric is. What a boon for James! Wish that fabric was more common!

  • Wisdum

    Hi Therese,
    It looks like I was right in my feeling of “Birds of a feather, flock together” There is more than one bi-polar in a co-dependant relationship (probably a multitude) I have been diagnosed bi-polar, but my wife isn’t (and from my point of view, it’s her not me… right !) On top of that, it appears that my wife and my ministry in this world is to be “professional ears”. Nobody wants to hear our problems, they only want to vent theirs (sound familiar ?) As soon as we start with our problems, they have an urgent need to do something else, somewhere else (more, sound familiar ?) … (I have to go to the toilet, works best, if you catch my drift !) If I may, let me comment on your Thesis On Anti-bi-polarity.
    At this point I have 2 options:
    1. Take the bait, have a messy fight and accelerate his downswing, or
    ** It’s all about venting, so somehow, sometime, someplace, somewhere … it will be vented. Also a male’s version and a woman’s version of venting is completely different. Men and women are different creatures and do not even speak the same language, and communication between the different species is dam near impossible.
    If a man comes home at the end of the day, and his spouse asks him how he feels, and he says “Fine”… he feels fine ! But if a man comes home at the end of the day and asks his spouse “How you feeling ?” (how often does that happen ?) and she says “Fine !”… she ain’t fine ! And if he thinks she is, he is about to step into a world of shit !
    “War is the absolute complete failure to communicate !”
    2. Grit my teeth and say “it’s the illness speaking”. If I can do that then I have a much better chance of diffusing the situation. A comment like “You sound stressed about work – let’s talk” has better results and sometimes can even stop the mood swing.
    ** Generally there are two things that define what self-esteem is to a man. The first is his work, he is his work. If he can proudly stand up and say “This is what I am” he is “fine” . But if his work sucks, and he is tired, beat and o-pressed and re-pressed, he will go into de-pression mode…and he ain’t fine ! He will try to conceal it (men have a serious problem, being considered a “wuss” , but if you insist on “pressing” the issue, you will release a raging tiger) Most men have been shortchanged in the “compassion/empathy” area, and are very uncomfortable dealing with it, although they need it desperately … That’s why God created women!(in Her image) The other thing is the facade he presents himself as, and that can be many-fold. Mostly, what he thinks will attract you and others, and what he believes he is, or wants to be (we very often come up short in that department also, and is a continuing struggle to maintain it, more fuel for de-pression)
    Lately I’ve also been able to say “Let’s talk before you get stuck in a negative cycle of thinking.” This is huge progress for us. It usually results in a fairly sensible conversation.
    ** The word “you” is probably the harshest word in our language, and will start more fights than anything else. That is the word of the dictator (notice that God does not use that word very often in the bible … not “You ,don’t eat from the Tree”, but “Do not eat from the Tree” … “We” and “Us” are very good words as in “Let us, create man in our own image” (not “Let Me create, in My image”) .
    Here’s another thing, men choose what they want to be in this Life (called freewill) Women do not ! By their nature they are controllers (men are anti-controllers) Women, first have to decide who to have a relationship with, then whether or not to have sexual relations. After that to get married or not, and have kids or not, How many kids ? 1. 2 .3. 4 ? On top of how many kids, there is an additional kid, she has to control and care for.. a very big kid ! And as far a running a home/nest that kid is almost useless. Worse than that, there is immediate sibling rivalry and a pecking order established (including the big kid, who is in constant fear of loosing his hierarchy)
    How does a woman maintain some sense of peace and order in all of this chaos and revolution . . beats the Hell out of me ! . . . I think I’ll go down to Casey’s and have a beer with the guys, see you later hun ! . . . Love you !
    All we are is “words” and the interaction of those words in this story “His-Story”, has actually all been spelled out in the Bible/Script.(we may ALL, still be in Genesis !) If the Bible is the Truth, then it shall all come to pass exactly as it says … but not as we think. It’s all perception, a view from where we stand (and perception is everything!) The question is “Where do we stand ?” … “My command to you is this, Love one another, as I have Loved you” Sorry folks, that’s “Uncompromising, Unconditional Love” … Are we ALL ready for that yet ? Where’s that line to stand on, so far it ain’t been religion, maybe we ALL just need to go direct to the Father, straight to the Top … Father forgive us, for we know not what we do ! …(can I hear an Amen !)
    LUV 2 ALL
    Wisdum

  • Evelyn M

    wow.. realizing that a hurtful comment may be the start of a mood swing is FANTASTIC as a suggestion to consider. I just have to be careful as there have been times I am simply in a bad mood and get “testy” because I am aware that this behavior will be accepted by the people around me. By the same token… It would be great if a spouse could learn to tell the difference between the two.. and also.. it seems somewhat unfair that they should hold on to their hurt feelings until the other person is in a better state… There has to be something out there for partners of depressives… Many of these partners do NOT appreciate being called co-dependent either!

  • Wisdum

    Re -Evelyn M | September 28, 2007 11:05 AM
    There has to be something out there for partners of depressives… Many of these partners do NOT appreciate being called co-dependent either!
    ** Here’s the problem, we are ALL partners in this world, with a different vision as to what would make this a perfect world (by the Way women are the eternal optomists, men just want to kick somebody’s ass) I guess you could say we are ALL also co-dependants (as in “All One body”) If one organ does not work in unison with the others, it results in illness and dis-order. There are no non-interactive organs in this body (as much as we may try to be) Unfortunately God gave everybody/organ/cell, freewill in this “Body” … What you see is what you get … Are we having fun yet ?
    LUV 2 ALL
    Wisdum

  • silent

    I have the same kind husband and have to deal his emotion cycle constantly. The problem is he refuse to see doctor and don’t take and kind of anti-depression medicine but vent his anger to his family members, he does not want to admit or face his illness. The kids are suffering too. I am at the point leave him or not. But, mostly I want to find way to prevent and handle his negativity impact to the family wisely since I know divorce is not the solution at all.
    Thanks for your speak out and wisdom on how to recognize then let the hurt bypass you. I guess I learn from you a bit.
    thanks!

  • Been There

    Dear Silent,
    I have never posted a comment but feel God wants me to tell you something. My husband refused to see a doctor because he did not feel he had a problem. He felt medicine was for the weaker. My children and I were his outlet when he worried, had a bad day, his favorite football team lost, him dealing with road rage, bad day at work and ect. I was where you are when one day I found bruises on my four year old buttocks and back from where he got so angry from her temper tamtrum while I was at the store. This was a day after when I found them, I took pictures. He got home from work, I took the kids to a family members home and said look, look at what your temper has done to our child. I told him I had protected the pictures and unless he left and got help, medicine and wrote an admission letter that I was calling the police. Mind you, this could of been a lot worse. Do not let it get to that point where one of you get hurt. He is emotionally abusing you all whether you realize it or not. If he truly loves you he will get help. I wish you the best of luck and will have you in my prayers.
    Been There.

  • Diana

    When you say James is in a depressive episode, is irritable, and itching for a fight, your perspective might be a little off. I tend to get depressed and can be set into a mood swing sometimes easily too. Honestly, I am not always “looking for a fight.” It is often the opposite. Depressed people tend to need extra love and kindness. I am often looking for more love and tenderness from my husband at those irritable times. The last thing I want is a fight that I know will make me sink even deeper. Maybe a neck massage, an invitation out to dinner, or sometimes just a really big hug!!!!!

  • Lynn

    I am a depressive and I lived with a man for 17 years who is schitzophrenic. I love this man very much. Any mental illness , any illness at all strains a relationship. Me, depressed, in bed for days. Him bringing me meals in bed, breakfast , lunch, and dinner. Me getting angry at him , the house is not clean, the dishes not done. why can’t you help me more. We ( me ) are a frustrated lot . I hate myself when I am depressed, I hate how I feel , I hate how I am behaving. I cannot control this awful feeling, I am mad at him for not being able to make me better. This poor Man that I loved so much, schiophrenic himself, tried really hard to help me. No one can help this is a disorder that comes and goes. Frustration is at the very core of mental illness. He and I don’t want to feel sick, we are frustrated that we are unable to help each other and ourselves. That was our life together. Our life apart, he suffers from many side effects caused by years of taking anti- phycotic drugs. Me I go to his mom’s house( thats where he lives) I help him shower, shave, sometimes I feed him, I take care of his feet, do his nails , change his bed every two weeks. I am angry, we wanted to be a normal couple, husband and wife. We became each others caregivers, we were and still are frustrated and we still love each other, we have not lived together for about 8 years now, our daughter has mental illness issues( frustration and unhappiness for everyone) These disorders can destroy, the fallout spans a very large area. By the way we both took and still do take meds, did the counseling thing, both together and seperately, our daughter now takes medication. I don’t belive that for one minute that the hurt bypasses you. You learn to live with the hurt, it goes on and on. Basically you just do the best that you can and just ride it out and hope fully you can enjoy the good times when they come around.Co- dependent of course we are, you will never survive if you can depend on each other. I am kind of glad I am codependent, through both of our illnesses we have still manage to love each other the best we can. It is never enough to fix things, love cures nothing, but hopefully it will endure.

  • ann

    It is hard to deal with someone who has mood swings. It is like walking on egg shells – it is hard to live with that on a daily basis. The only thing you can do is remember to treat your self and that the person is just displacing his anger onto whoever will take and accept it. You have to realize that you deserve better and talk to them about it. A good way to get help for your spouses is to say you need marriage counseling for yourself. They will go with you and get some help. I know it is hard for people to recognize the dangers in them selves but when they are escalating to physical harm – you need to be strong and get them help for you and your loved ones. Think of the children and how the verbal, emotional and physical abuse will scar them for life. It has to take two to make a relationship work and remember you cannot do it all and have it all one-sided. Be honest and talk to them in a safe way like with other family members that support them and understand them. Do not gang up on the person and blame them for everything but tell them that you love them and do it in a reassuring way.

  • Mrs. C

    I’m fairly new to being the spouse of a bi-polar man. He told me early in our relationship that he had it and takes medication. That prepared me for things that came later and probably would have scared and hurt me so bad I probably would have left. I never saw any real bad episodes through our first couple of years together but recently I have. He continues to take his meds but ocassionally still has stress-induced episodes. The problem is, when I try to make those “I see you’re stressed” comments, he denies it and continues blaming me or our children for his mood. He had one ipisode so bad a few weeks ago that I feared for my kids’ safety so I loaded them and the dog in the car and called his brother and asked him to go check on him. But he just told his brother a bunch of lies to get him out of our business and they BOTH told me I was overreacting, this wasn’t an episode, the kids were just being bad. (which they really weren’t at the time of the incident.) Now in addition to having to live with his episodes, I feel like his own denial has his family thinking I’m a drama queen. (and a bad mother) I never called them for any of his other ipisodes and I CERTAINLY wouldn’t have packed up the whole family OR disturbed the in-laws at 10 o’clock at night if he were behaving normally. My brother-in-law didn’t even ask me for my side of what happened before telling me I was overreacting. Now I can’t even face him at family get-togethers. I’m just so hurt. How does loving someone though their KNOWN mental instability make ME the drama queen? Sorry so long… I just had to vent.

  • ann

    It is okay to vent – you need to get it out and this helps. I was hospitalized for schizoprenic because my doctor believed my husband and family when my in-laws are the ones with the mood swings. I react and get blamed for being moody and over reacting also. I see a counselor now to deal with this and responding to some people who have problems. I have always been the peacemaker but sometimes I need peace myself. When I am depressed, no one is used to it and everyone over reacts to my being sad. Normally, I am the strong one everyone turns to me but sometimes I need someone to turn to. I started therapy to help myself and kept seeking it until I found a good therapist. I see her once a week. It might help to find a good counselor or therapist (I recommend the same gender who might help understand better).

  • ann

    Another key that will help is communication. When you want a hug, talk, a moonlight walk, a kiss – ask for it. Be specific about your needs especially when depressed. Our spouses cannot read our minds – we need to show them how to express one’s emotions in a healthy way. Like my mom, says never go to bed angry. This helps make us realize that we as a couple are important and need this to establish our relationship as man and wife and not just parents. You must take time for your self and do something each day that makes you smile. Even if it is pick a flower or have a cup of coffee or tea. If you expect someone else to make you happy, you will never be happy. You are responsible for your own happiness and have the power within yourself to achieve this.

  • Larry Parker

    In my own situation, I have always been compliant with my meds and I have never been violent.
    Even so, I don’t doubt that I was very difficult to live with during the last two-and-a-half years of our marriage until we separated. In part, ironically, because I was so compliant with my meds … thanks to my less-than-competent doctors, I was on the wrong medication regimen! And, in fairness to Emily, she had expressed some skepticism about my doctors — but only at a point when the dynamic between us had already become poisonous, so I felt she was trying to undermine me (further) instead of being genuinely concerned for my well-being.
    That said, I don’t think I was asking my ex-wife to be a saint — just a partner living up to her vows. (I mean, yes, I was moody, but it’s not like people without mental illness don’t get moody occasionally — it’s part of the human condition.)
    But I guess she wasn’t capable of that.

  • Lauri

    I don’t have a husband anymore. We divorced after 13 years of marriage. I do have family and friends that have been impacted by my depression. Depression scares my siblings and is a rallying point among my friends. I intend to take this series of articles and tweak them to suit me and my life. Thank you Therese, James and Anna.

  • stormyrain

    My husband (soon to be ex) is bipolar. He cannot take meds because of his high risk job. He is also a musician (they have a whole other set of issues). I tried to get him to go to counseling and oftered to go with him if he wanted me to. I tried to not take his comments to heart, etc. But the bottomline is (after 11 years) I cannot “cover for him” when he has these moments which may last for weeks. I cannot be the “fall guy”. I’m sick of being looked at as the unstable person in the relationship because of the things he has said about me to cover his issues. His adult son and I have been there, taken the abuse and picked up the pieces over and over again. Both of us have had enough and have taken to the tough love road. We can’t help the unwilling. It’s been over a month since I’ve talked to him or he has even tried to contact me. Rumor has it he has moved on to another woman…poor girl. I’m sure she has no idea he is married. It’s hard to be without him at times because I do love him. But I can’t take the mean, mentally abusive things he does to me and others in the family. The mind games have ended…because I said “No more.”

  • AlleyE

    Thank you for the dialogue. It really reached me, and seemed to mirror some of the same situations I’ve encountered with my significant other. I’m wondering, if down swings can seem to last for at least a year, do upswings do the same? Will there always be a cycle?

  • Roy Moyer

    I’m a depressive myself, and subject to severe anxiety attacks when my significant other (we’re both 70 years old and have a two-year relationship) gets into one of her own crazy phases, which can be precipitated by what to me is nothing in particular. I have decided to take the attitude that, since I think highly of her as a person and value our relationship for many reasons, the best thing to do is ride with it. I have decided to fall back on the old saw that you can’t control the behavior of others, but you have some control over your own reactions and attitudes. If you vaue your relationship at its best, as I do, it’s the only answer.
    Therapy is not the answer. I have yet to encounter a therapist of any sripe who has a clue. It’s your problem, and only you can know what it’s about and use your own head to find ways of dealing with it. My “favorite” counselor used to nod out during our sessions.
    You know, William James, philsopher, psychologist (“The Varieties of Religious Experience”), brother of the novelist Henry, and a brilliant man of many parts, was opposed to the idea, new at the time, of requirinig a degree to practice medicine, on the basis that it would only admit certified idiots into the profession. He was right, and we’re still learning the lesson he already knew.
    There is a single purpose doctors now serve: they are licensed to prescribe drugs that sometimes have their uses, as my antianxiety agent does for me. There are exceptions. But watch out for the phoneys.

  • ann

    i just want to congratulate all of you. it is hard to even take the first step and admitting the problem. remember the problem is not yours to solve. you cannot fix them – you have to just take care of yourself and try to help them through their episodes. unless one has firsthand knowledge of dealing with this, it is hard for them to counsel or advise others. i am very understanding and try to place myself in the other person’s shoes. again communication is the key – ask them what would make them feel better, what specifically is bothering them and let them rant and rave. it is normal to be emotional at times as long as they release it in a positive way. ask them to write a letter or journal if they cannot express themselves to you.

  • Larry Parker

    stormyrain:
    It may be too late to save your marriage, but I hope not his relationship to his son.
    There is only one job I know of where one is not allowed to take mood stabilizing medication for bipolar disorder. And if it’s the job I think it is, or even close to it, he is putting far (FAR) more lives at risk than his own. Someone needs to convince him (if you or your son can’t) to take early retirement or disability and get on the medication he needs — for everyone’s sake.
    Please know that your marriage ended because he, in essence, chose his job over his health and his family — NOT because it is evil to have bipolar disorder in and of itself. Only when manic depression is completely untreated does it erupt in its most monstrous forms that create utter chaos for those around the person as well as the person him- or herself.

  • carmen

    My girlfriend suffers from deppressive disorder and or bipolor I’ve been with her for 3yrs and I’m always feeling extremely overwhelme when everytime she goes through something I have to pick up the pieces because shes to stressed out or depressed to deal with it. I mean about two weaks ago she had an episode extremely bad because I told her I couldn’t handle being in the relationship anymore because my 11yrs old was also start to feel the stress of the relationship. She ended up in the ER with a mini stroke and blood pressure extremely high due to these anger outburst and impulsive behavior of hers. I mean she goes from being extremely insecure, having jealous attack manipulating me,verbally abusing me lying for little thing. She’s always hiper she rarely sleeps, when she’s awake she always depress and tries to make me feel bad for her I mean she is a 43 year old woman and she always losing her jobs because of her outburst behavior. I have tried being a friend to help her but theres time I feel as if she doesn’t want any help as if everyone is suppose to always pick up the message that she created. I have since asked her to move out and to get psychiatric help cause I also had to get some help because of the verbal abuse she put me through I self esteem was almost to the ground but I have a child that needs me so Im always the strong one. Now I no longer wish to be with her but I know she is very sick and she can not deal with the whole seperation and while I’m trying to be a friend she is pushing alway the little bit of strenght I have inside me away. Since the last episode she has been laid off from work and has no way tho pay her bills I have allowed her to come stay in an extra room I have but she feeling so depressed that she lashes at me without realizing what she does she always crying saying she is sorry put I only feel sorry for her cause I’ve tried everything from books to listening I just dont know want other advise I can give her. Can someone please help me I’m about to pack my luggage and move else where but that would be leaving the thing that I love my job my home my friend, because of her illness what should I do I need some strong advise. Thank you

  • ann

    sorry about your situation carmen. ask her to go to counseling with you – say you need it and need a buddy to go with you. try to get her out or to journal her feelings and explain to her how she is hurting herself and you. hold her and tell her you want to be her friend and tell her honestly how you feel. she cannot read your mind as you cannot read hers. she needs to learn how to communicate her feelings without fear or reprimand. ask her to write a letter to you if she cannot openly express her emotions in a healthy way. hope this helps you and everyone involved. our prayers will be with you.

  • Therese

    My husband has anxiety disorder (social and general) and mild depression that has been with him to some degree, I believe, all of his life. He has managed to function in a limited way: work, church, a few social events that I drag him to over the years and any necessary or obligatory duties, but he has no joy, hobbies, interests, outside involvements, dreams to look forward to in his life. I think he could manage to get by like this for the rest of his life but I can’t accept this lifestyle. I am separated emotionally, mentally and physically at this time(but remain in the same home) and feel hopeless that things will ever change. I have been on the fence for years trying to decide whether to leave or stay. He has been going to a psychologist(finally) for the anxiety for several months and I see him trying, but he refuses to take medication. I think I should be able to expect him to do “everything” he possibly can to get better. And he’s not. I don’t know if I have enough love and care for him to stay. I feel like I’m settling for so little in my relationship with him. He has no needs outside work, church and home. Are there any good books or support groups dealing with anxiety disorder?
    I have been going to counseling too and that helps but I feel like I need to take more action to change myself and the relationship.
    Thanks for listening.
    Therese

  • ann

    obviously you still love him because you have not left – what he needs now is a friend – take him to a dance or social event from your church or another church or the local ymca. it is not that he has no other needs it is just all he can handle right now. it takes alot of work to handle working, church, home and relationships. remember why you chose him and why you fell in love with him. take a walk together and hold hands – explain to him how you feel – he cannot read your mind. write your feelings down and share it with him or your therapist. hope this helps you

  • amybrosius

    That’s very helpful. Me, being bipolar, I find it very helpful to talk to my husband about my depression and anxiety.

  • Don

    Im not sure where to begin, but I guess the beginning should start with the day my wife, the woman I knew, became this transformed depressed woman who lives with me. Mar 14 2006, was the day it began. My wife, in a desperate bid to push her son into moving out of the environment of bad influences, attempted suicide, and almost succeeded, popped a fistful of pills, and stopped breathing when I was rushing her to the hospital, I thought she had a heart attack, I never new, until 24 hours later, when I found a suicide note. She survived, but not without injury, now she has short term memory loss, and has been diagnosed with sever clinical depression. I have watched go from a vibrant exciting person, to someone who I don’t know anymore. Her depression can take her depths of such self loathing, ant-social, lock herself in the bedroom for days. She made another attempt on her life, about one year later, this time I was aware something was wrong, checked her diary and called the police and a ambulance, she had refused o go to the hospital. 51 days, she stayed in a hospital, mental health, etc’s, bi lateral, a cocktail of medications, physco therapy, and here I am, sitting in my living room, while she is upstairs, for the 6th day, sleeping, or not sleeping, but laying there, saying nothing, eating when the mood strikes her. I have read your posts, and feel for all of you, but what can I do? Be supportive, it has been my middle name, she can go weeks at a time, the 16 different pills a day, and where is the change, not. How do I continue to be supportive, what do you as wives and husbands of depression, deal with everything. I am so tired of the looks of despair mixed with a I hate snarl. Then all of a sudden she can come out of it, and bam, there she is again, smiling and full of life, which used to last for weeks, now the bouts of depression are longer, and the good feelings are fewer, weeks of good feelings are now days, and depression is weeks. She is faithful to her medication, and she is seeing one of the leading mental health doctors, however, she is not doing any better. There is no support for me here in my City, I don’t know who to turn too, and my best friend, isn’t talking to me at the moment, then again, she is not talking to anyone. I need support, and I have no one to turn too, so thanks for listening. I hope all the best for all of you.
    Don

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For people prone to depression and anxiety – i.e. human beings – the holidays invite countless possibility to get sucked into negative and catastrophic thinking. You take the basic stressed-out individual and you increase her to-do list by a third, stuff her full of refined sugar and processed f

posted 9:30:12am Nov. 21, 2013 | read full post »

Can I Say I’m a Son or Daughter of Christ and Suffer From Depression?
In 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, we read: “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.” What if we aren’t glad, we aren’t capable of rejoicing, and even prayer is difficult? What if, instead, everything looks dark,

posted 10:56:04am Oct. 29, 2013 | read full post »




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