Here’s some background you might need for choosing my inner child:
The Freaky Therese: I haven’t been able to dig up an official background check on this babe, but she does resemble those dolls that come alive in the middle of the night to reenact a scene or two from “Fatal Attraction.”
Ariel (aka “The Little Mermaid“): King Triton’s headstrong daughter who wants to be something other than what she is … a human. Like all of Disney’s motherless princesses, daddy dotes on her … in an unnatural, Freudian way, if you ask me.
Belle (from “The Beauty and the Beast“): Can you imagine this broad’s baggage after being locked up in a castle and kept captive by a heinous monster? She probably kisses the Beast in the end not because she’s fallen in love, but because she’s truly psychotic.
Naked Barbie: I supsect this gal suffers from sensory-integration issues because she walks around on her tippy-toes. And then there’s the anorexia with breast implants. You didn’t think they were real, did you?