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Beginner's Heart

Beginner's Heart

tragedy, great sorrow, and the breath ~

I have nothing to say after a tragedy of this magnitude. My heart hurts — I have to catch my breath, thinking of sending a child or children off to school, and never seeing them again… My mind races: what have we come to? How did this happen? What can we do to stop these horrific tragedies?

I have been breathing for the families whenever I remember. And Newton, Connecticut has been in my thoughts often today… Tonglen helps, but it doesn’t stop the anger or the grief. When I become incensed with someone on FB who sees the national outrage as a threat to her right to own a gun, I try to channel that reaction for the families, whose anger & horror and grief so certainly outstrip anything I can imagine…

And when I’m missing my younger son, who will not be coming home for the holidays, I channel that, for these families who will be missing a child every holiday from now on…

I offer only this: great sorrow. Deep breaths. And a heartfelt hope that somehow, we find a way to stop these tragedies…

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