Beginner's Heart

Beginner's Heart


a ‘sunny’ disposition: love, warmth, & beginner’s heart ~

I absolutely adore sunlight. Don’t get me wrong: I also love rainy, foggy, and cool wet days. Not sleet, so much, or ice (especially on roads!). But the sunlight — it make me want to stretch out like a lizard on a flat rock and just bask…

It’s no wonder, then, that to have a ‘sunny’ disposition is a compliment. No one made a song called ‘You are my thunderstorm,’ even in droughts…

When I was a college student, my two old ladies — Grandma & Aunt Bonnie, who lived together only a few blocks from my dorm & later college apartments — used to call me their sunshine. “Here comes our sunshine!” Aunt Bonnie would say when I came over (practically daily!). I loved them dearly; they were my lifeline while my parents lived overseas. I would sit in the tiny living room, on the scratchy horsehair sofa, and feel as though the room was full of sunshine. Not mine, but theirs ~

Something there is about love: it warms almost physically, like the late  fall sun on the deck this afternoon. I’m thinking that’s what it means to have a sunny disposition ~ to offer love easily, to all of those we meet. That kind of accepting, joyful love relaxes us the same way the September light leaves me drowsy & happy.

I’d like to believe that Grandma & Aunt Bonnie could feel the heat of my love for them, as I felt warmed and comforted by theirs. I’d like to believe that I brought them as much happiness as they did me. But somehow, the love we take seems always more than what we feel we make…

 



Previous Posts

more wonderings about (today's) Puritans, and a broken education system
Today I was thinking -- again -- about the similarities between contemporary conservative Christianity (at least in everyday life) and historic

posted 4:48:45pm Sep. 19, 2014 | read full post »

measuring up
Rarely do I feel inadequate, like I don't measure up. If that sounds overly confident, I don't mean to. It's just that I don't normally spend a lot of time comparing myself to others. From a very early age I knew my life wasn't like most American kids, so while I may have wished I had a different

posted 5:25:45pm Sep. 18, 2014 | read full post »

letting go, or, what teaching teaches
You know that old joke about giving a party and nobody comes? Well, for presenters, it's a truism. I've given workshops w/ only one person (and she left early!). Last night, however, was a new one, even for me. A

posted 4:57:15pm Sep. 17, 2014 | read full post »

afternoon break
I should be working on the presentation I'm giving in...oh, 3 hours. :) I should be figuring out what to fix for dinner before I go. I should... I should. Instead, tea break. A cup of good ol' house tea -- Panyang Congou from Harney's, And plain vanilla macarons from the Whole Foods bakery. Bl

posted 4:51:14pm Sep. 16, 2014 | read full post »

health, gadgets, and technology
I am NOT good at the boredom of keeping healthy. I blew my knees running. My joint replacement put paid to treadmilling. I hate my recumbent bike (and no, I don't know why, except that it's boring). So cardi

posted 12:14:13pm Sep. 15, 2014 | read full post »




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