Beliefnet
Because This Is Your Life

No matter how you look at it…it’s true

And there’s a scary part to it…and possibly the feeling of security as well.

It just depends on you.

Along with this comes the strangest part of all…

The fact that you can know the “scary part” is going on in your life and still be content…even though it leaves you feeling like there’s no way out.

So what am I talking about?

Your life…and the path it’s going down.

Now if you happen to be somebody that is not feeling fulfilled in your life…and know it’s time to do something about it…

Yet…

You still find yourself not doing anything about it…and watching the same old thing go by day after day…

What’s stopping you from doing anything about it?

After all…

If today was your last day on this planet, is this how you would want your last 24 hours to be?

Let’s say today wasn’t the last day of your life…

What happens if nothing changes in your life?

1. Decision diamonds- Life wouldn’t be life without decisions. Of course that’s pretty obvious. And this also includes the decisions you didn’t make…the ones that quite often leave you saying, “I wish I _________” or “My life would have been better off if I had only done _________.”

What isn’t so obvious and goes unnoticed is what’s really going on during all of these decisions you made and didn’t make.

There’s two things going on…

One, every decision you make has an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks. At first it seems like “no way.”

However…

When you take the time to scan through your life and look closely…while being honest with yourself…you’ll see this pretty easily.

And two, as a result…

You’ll realize there’s no such things as mistakes.

See, all of what I just said comes down to knowing what your values are. Or said another way, knowing what it is that’s most important to you…what you “love” and are “inspired” to be doing.

Because when you realize this you’ll know what I said above…you’ll see the benefits and drawbacks to the decisions you made…equally.

And it’s this that gives you the courage to be confident in being more certain about making decisions that in the past you would have hesitated on…or not made at all.

This is the first step to turning your life around and leads in to the next part…

2. The people pleasing syndrome- Whether you’re aware of it or not…and most people aren’t aware of it…the situations you’re currently in that you don’t want to be in has much to do with you wanting to please people.

For example…

I know of a “then” attorney that did everything in his life just trying to please his father.

He became an attorney because his father wanted him to. He got married to a certain woman because his father wanted him to. Where he lived was where his father wanted him to live.

And no matter what he did to gain the approval of his father…it was never enough.

As a result…

This man’s health got to the point where he suffered a heart attack. After his father passed away he found out his father left him with unpaid debts. This led to his law practice going out of business…which led to his wife leaving him and taking the kids.

It reached the point where he was basically ready to take his own life.

And then he realized with his father gone…there was no one left to please anymore.

This was a revelation for him that turned his life around.

He realized that practicing law wasn’t what he loved…and that the woman he married wasn’t the type of woman he wanted to be with.

And this gave him a new lease on life to do what he truly loved…fixing up classic cars and selling them.

So now he was doing what he loved and what also happened…he met a new woman that was his “perfect” match and they ended up getting married.

What it all comes down to is this…

So many people are so worried about wanting to please others they’re infatuated with…they’ll do anything to follow through on it…even if it means “mortgaging” their life away.

And strange as it sounds…

It’s the infatuating over someone that’s at the root cause of it all.

Because after all, do you ever find yourself wanting to please someone you resent and despise…of course not.

Therefore…

When it comes to breaking the “people pleasing syndrome”, just know that no matter what you do you’ll have people liking and disliking…supporting and challenging…praising and criticizing you…equally.

And this includes friends, acquaintances, strangers, and certainly family.

Be mindful of this and stand your ground because it’s the very thing needed for you to turn your life around.

Speaking of your life…

3. What is your life- I’m sure you already know that life…especially your life…is about change. Now at first you’re likely to think it’s about changing for the “better” or “worse”…right? Because after all this is the conventional wisdom you always hear.

Yet…

That’s not true.

And the reason your life is not about changing for the “better” or “worse” goes back to what I said earlier…there’s an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks to every situation you come across.

The same is true about changing your life around.

Your life is about knowing what it is that you’d love to be, do, and have.

Once you know what this is you’ve answered the question, “what is your life?”

Of course your answer is going to be different than somebody elses because you’re unique.

Along with this also remember…

All humans have every trait (4600 total that are positive and negative). But it’s the way you express these traits based on your uniqueness and what you’re here to be, do, and have is what defines what your life is.

And once you know what your life is, you’ll also know what you want to be remembered for.

Because when you get right down to it…there’s something inside of you that you want the world to see…that leads to what you want to be remembered for.

And in doing so you want to keep asking “why.” Because when you have enough reasons “why” in what you want…and there’s enough pain from how your life will turn out if you don’t do anything about it…and you know what you “love” doing…while not worrying about what others think of you…

You’ll turn your life around.

Along with it you’ll discover how your magnificence and brilliance is a special gift to the world in a way that serves both you and others to be the change you seek in the world.

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