Beliefnet
Because This Is Your Life

Here’s something that you do 24 hours a day that you probably were not fully aware of until now.

Along with that you were most likely not aware of the many different ways that you do this.

What I’m referring to is the fact that you are talking 24 hrs a day, whether it is to yourself, to others, or through your thoughts and dreams.

Of course while you’re doing this you are verbalizing in some way thousands and thousands of different words and phrases.

Out of all these words and phrases there are certain ones that it’s important to be aware of because they may be keeping you stuck in some way…

And even others are outright dangerous.

This brings up what I’ll be speaking about today and that is:

“The 3 most dangerous words that hold people back”

What is so interesting about these 3 most dangerous words is that we use them on a regular basis and in many different situations.

While these 3 words may seem harmless on the surface, in many situations in the different areas of your life they are dangerous and most people are not even aware of it.

If fact, when most people use these 3 words they actually think it is helping them, especially in situations that have to do with living the type of life they’d love to live.

The 3 most dangerous words that hold people back are…

“I know that”

Let’s take a deeper look at this and what you can do to overcome it.

1. Mind games

You’ve done this many times. I’ve done this many times. We’ve all done this many times. Take a look throughout your life and you’ll see this. You bought a book and started reading it or had someone give you advice or heard someone do a speech. Perhaps you even have others promote their products and programs to you and the same things occurred there as well.

And then what happened?

You listened to or read the information presented and many times said either to yourself or someone else, “I know that.”

Perhaps you also said, “I’ve read that” or “I’ve seen that” or “I’ve heard that a million times.”

What did you do after you said, “I know that”, “I’ve seen that”, “I’ve read that” or “I’ve heard that a million times?”

In all probability you didn’t continue any further and went on to something else.

Just know that this is a trap your mind is playing on you and it does so through the 3 most dangerous words… “I know that.”

Also be aware that your mind will use other variations of this such as, “I’ve seen that”, “I’ve read that” or “I’ve heard that a million times.”

No matter what game your mind is playing with you, the bottom line is that these 3 words are dangerous and will hold you back.

So what can you do about it?

The first thing you do when you catch yourself saying, “I know that” is to question your mind and say, “do I really know that?” Your mind will say, “yes you know that” and then try and keep you stuck.

This happens when you find yourself reading that book once (if you even read through it all) or listening to that interview of someone speaking once, and then you’ll go on and look for something else and claim what you tried didn’t work, and you’ll continue to say, I know that.”

When you catch yourself saying, “I know that” ask yourself that question, “do I really know that?” This will challenge your mind but it will help you become more aware if you’re falling for this little game your mind is playing with you.

After doing this if you still find yourself saying, “I know that” it’s time to ask another question.

2. Use your illusion

The next question you would ask is, “If I know that, how am I using it right now in my life?” This will challenge you at first because your mind is being challenged. Your mind is trying to keep you stuck in this illusion because it craves the “new” and has a high tendency to want to reject “old” information or something it’s heard before.

This is one of the reasons why many people will try something new, such as a product they just bought or advice they’ve heard from someone. And in the process of doing this, their mind will have them say those 3 dangerous words, “I know that.”

So by you saying, “If I know that, how am I using it right now in my life”, it gets you to become more aware of whether you really are applying what you’ve heard or read from someone, even if you claim that you already knew it.

The bottom line is…

“If you’re not doing it, you don’t know it”

Let’s now take this to a higher level and transform your mindset (and your life) even further.

3. Better and best

Now that you’ve realized that you are “using it” in your life right now, ask yourself the question, “How can I use it better in my life?” Let me give you an example.

Let’s say you come across someone giving a talk on how to become financially free. As you listen, you may find yourself saying, “I know that, I’ve heard people say this stuff before.”

Before going any further you would ask yourself, “do I really know that?”

If you find yourself continuing to say and think that you know that, then ask yourself,
“If I know and have already heard that, where have I applied or am using in my life what this person is saying about becoming financially free?”

This will get you to think and in the process help you break free of being trapped by the 3 most dangerous words.

Then after you answer that question ask, “How can I use the information this person is saying about becoming financially free…how can I use it better in my life?”

By answering this question, you’ll be able to expand on what you’re learning and come up with your own unique way of applying the information.

In fact, you’ll also start coming up with your own ideas that could very well lead to many of the opportunities you’d love to attract into your life.

By overcoming the 3 most dangerous words, you’ll be able to tap into your inner genius and brilliance. As a result, you’ll get that one life transforming idea “pop” into your mind.

This will also allow you to come from your heart, which is where you’ll discover the magnificence of who you are.

Always remember…

You are not your mind, you are your heart, and just know that HEART stands for:

“Healing Energy Always Resonates Truth”

And the truth is that you are an amazing person with so much to offer the world.

It’s one of those things that keeps you up at night.

And it involves those never ending questions…

How did this happen?How did I get to this point in my life?What can I do to get out of this?

…And along with this comes those other never ending thoughts that leave you very curious about something you’ve always wanted to do.

Before I talk about that consider this…

How much are you in control of your life?

Whether it’s your current career, family life, your physical health, your financial situation, or your overall state of mind…how much control do you have? (And when I say control I’m referring to you being truly fulfilled in any of these areas, along with the other areas of life most important to you?)

And…

Are any of these areas controlling your life?

Because if they are controlling your life it can leave you feeling like you’re walking on a tightrope 1000 ft. above the ground…

Just as much as it can leave you feeling like you’re trying to jam on the brakes of your car at 50 miles per hour while driving on a sheet of ice.

It leaves you feeling out of control, helpless, and powerless.

Now of course something can be done for you to take control of your life so you can go from where you are now to where you want to be.

Before you’re able to do this it’s important to answer a very fundamental question.

1. Tell me why

Whenever you get into a situation, especially one that is controlling and affecting your life in ways you don’t want, the question that always comes up is, “why?”

“Why did this happen to me?”

And in order for you to go from where you are now to where you want to be in any area of your life, it starts by answering that “why” question…

Because unless you do, you’ll have a very high probability of repeating the same
patterns over and over again…and in many cases attribute why your current situation is the way it is to something other than what it really is.

There are two strategies you can use here.

The first is to ask yourself if your expectations are realistic or unrealistic.

For example, if you’re expecting people and situations to be more one sided (more positive than negative) then you set yourself up for an unrealistic expectation.

Every situation and person has both sides equally. The idea here is to use both the positive and negative to help you in what you’re looking to achieve.

Many people want to get rid of negativity and negative thinking…why would you want to do that when it can help you in certain situations. How can it help you?

By getting you to set realistic expectations on yourself, others, and the world in general.

Another example of this is trying to live a happy life in an attempt to get rid of sadness and depression . This also sets you up for many of the situations you don’t want to be in that leaves you asking “why.”

And just like the negative thinking can be used to help you to set realistic expectations, so does the so called “depression.” And it also helps you to set realistic expectations on yourself, others, and the world in general.

Not only are these the sources of “why” we get into situations we don’t want to be in—but as strange as it also sounds—it’s the very way you can also use to answer that “why” question.

Because by doing this you start transforming from a fantasy seeker into a fulfillment driven person…which in turn begins the process of you going from where you are now to where you want to be.

2. Time is always on my side

The second strategy you can use to answer that “why” question involves that elusive and sometimes infamous 4 letter word…time.

How many times have you found yourself saying, “I don’t have enough time” or “There aren’t enough hours in the day” or “I couldn’t do what I wanted because I ran out of time doing other things?”

Let’s face it, we’ve all done this.

Now if you’re in a situation where you don’t want to be and feel like you’re not in control of your life (which usually leads to that “why” question again), then it’s wise to use this second strategy I promised you earlier.

And that is to ask…

“How do I spend my time?”

Because if you’re looking to change your current situation, whether it involves getting out of debt , improving your physical health, transitioning to a career that you’d love doing (and even figuring this out if you currently don’t know), or whatever it is for you, the question is, “How much time are you spending on this?”

Now I’m asking you, “How do you spend your time?”

Are you spending 4 hours a day watching TV or 4 hours a day learning about building your financial future?

Are you spending 4 hours a day surfing the internet mindlessly or spending 4 hours a day learning how to start (and build) a business doing something you love?

If you’re currently working a job you don’t like and commute 2 hours a day, how are you spending that time?

You get the idea.

This is incredibly important because when it comes to getting out of the situation you’re currently in (and even getting into it in the first place), knowing how you’re spending your time will give you a snapshot of where you are and how you can get to where you want to be.

Remember…

Time is always on your side.

3. Just let yourself go

Earlier I mentioned those other never ending thoughts that leave you very curious about something you’ve always wanted to do. Let’s come back to that now.

And this too involves that “why” question but in a much different way. By answering this “why” question you’ll be able to just let yourself go into the world of what were once thought of as impossibilities.

You see, no matter what is going on in your life right now you have something of tremendous value to contribute to the world. And the best part about this is that it’s something you would love to do most.

It’s something that involves your purpose, your mission, your spiritual quest…

And carried out through the uniqueness of who you are.

And this is what also leaves you with those never ending thoughts of how you want your life to be. Those never ending thoughts that leaves you very curious about what it is that you’ve always wanted to do…

And those never ending thoughts of the new ideas and new ways of how you can go about doing what you love.

Now if by some chance you don’t know what those are yet, ask yourself that other “why” question I mentioned about a minute ago, and that is…

“Why do I want to have ___________?”

We all want the “how” but it’s the “why” that jump starts your life. It’s the “whys” that help you take control of your life.

And it’s the “whys” that helps you go from what seems like a “no way out” situation to living a fulfilled life while doing what you love and loving what you do (of course this also involves taking action).

Remember…

When you have enough “whys” the “how’s” take care of themselves.

As a result you start coming up with the answers to the questions you at first couldn’t figure out.

You come up with the new ways and ideas on how to go about living the type of life you’d love to live.

You start to attract the people and situations that help you along the way.

And in the process you realize how magnificent and special of a person you really are…

And in return the world treats you like the magnificent and amazing person you have always been.

This happens much more than you’d like…

Especially in the bedroom.

And most of the time at night.

Although it does happen in other places from time to time.

But wherever it occurs, there are times when it downright terrorizes you…and other times it feels like you’re in a temporary straight jacket.

And it leaves you silent on the outside…and even on the inside, even though it screams out from inside you at the same time and you don’t even hear it.

On top of this…

It almost always happens to “good” people who have the best of intentions.

And what I’m talking about here are those nagging, negative thoughts. You know, the mind chatter that starts when you lay down to sleep at night.

Now we’re not talking about just any old mind chatter or negative thoughts.

Rather…

It’s those thoughts that leave you in a paralyzed state of desperation…those thoughts that literally have you feeling like there’s no way out…and sometimes to the point of just wanting to jump off a 200 ft. high bridge.

Now there’s two questions that immediately come up here.

The first I’ll get to in a minute because it’s the most difficult one for people to answer…even though it’s an easy to understand question.

The other question has to do with what I said a moment ago and that is…

Why do so many good people end up living quiet lives of desperation?

1. Unreasonable uniqueness

It’s been said that in order to have “success” and get along with people you must be reasonable. Well, that’s only partially true…which means it’s mostly not true…and yet another false construct.

And this brings us to the first question I said I’d come back to.

The question is…

“What do you want?”

When I ask you this question, what’s your answer? When you ask yourself, what is your answer?

Fact is…

Most people say they don’t know…and have no idea of what they want. And the reasons why are:

One, they’re being reasonable.

Which…two, all but eliminates the uniqueness of who they are…

That leads to…three…the “shoulds”, “have tos”, “got tos”, and “supposed tos”…

Which ultimately result in…

A quiet life of desperation.

When someone says, “I don’t know what I want”…what’s really being said is, “I’ve allowed the world to stifle what is important to me about what I feel is special and important and what I felt I wanted. I’ve allowed the world to dictate to me what is important.”

This is what’s going on in the subconscious…and then consciously you’ll say, “I don’t know what I want”…

Which I’ve never found to be true…

Because the only way someone can say they don’t know what they want…is if they’re comparing it to what they do want.

Therefore…

They obviously know what it is that they want.

It’s just been trampled on by society and the expectations of others…which leaves you in fear to actually come out and say what you want.

And by conforming to these expectations of society you lose a part of yourself to include your uniqueness.

Now, this brings up the need for your unreasonable uniqueness.

The bottom line is this…

You ability to be unreasonable dictates the amount of success you achieve in any area of your life.

Just to be clear…

When I talk about being unreasonable, I’m not saying to disregard others…or not care about people…or to just rebel for the sake of it.

What I am talking about is standing your ground when the world…and various people and institutions…who don’t have your best interests at heart…are doing everything they can to try and get you to conform and subordinate…to them.

Also…

When it comes to being unreasonable…to do so in a way that benefits and serves humanity.

Just a few examples of this are Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Einstein, and every other super successful person.

And this also includes people who are lesser well know.

Because when you come from this place of being “unreasonable”…in a healthy way…you bring out more of your uniqueness.

And you lessen the likelihood of living a quiet life of desperation.

It also brings out something else…

2. Desperation inspiration

Let’s face it…at some point in your life you’ve had a situation when you felt desperate in some way. It could have ranged from your job…to your financial situation…your family…and possibly even your life.

In these moments of desperation you have two choices…

Give up…or become inspired.

And whichever one of these you choose is going to depend on…you guessed it…knowing what you want and fully embracing your uniqueness.

This is where you “tap into” the “I love tos”, “I’m inspired tos”, “I choose tos”, and “This is what I’ve always dreamed of doing.”

Because it’s here where your uniqueness comes out.

It’s interesting…

How many times have you heard someone say, “I need to have connections”…or…”I need to have money”…or…”I don’t have enough time”…when it comes to doing what you love?

Now on the surface this may seem true…and at some point these do come into play.

However…

When it comes to going from “desperation” to inspiration all it takes is what I said earlier…knowing what you want… and being unreasonable…which allows you to embrace your uniqueness.

See…

It’s a mass myth that “nice guys” and “good people” finish “last”…and that you “have to” be mean and nasty in order to be “successful.”

Look no further than the phrase “filthy rich” and you get the idea.

People are people…they’re so called “good” at times…and so called “bad” during other moments.

And in either case you can go from desperation to inspiration.

It all comes from inside of you.

Now, there’s another part of this which is a subtle part of you.

And strange as it sounds…

This is something most people are teaching you to do, which is the same thing that not only stifles who you are and your uniqueness…but is also the backbone behind your biggest fears.

3. Wearing the bulls eye of life

Whether they openly admit it or not, the overall majority of people are VERY much concerned with what others think about them.

And this ties right in with what I just mentioned two sentences ago…

The thing most people are teaching you to do, which stifles who you are…your uniqueness…is the backbone behind your biggest fear…while also keeping you in desperation…

Is one sided…or as I like to call…fantasy thinking.

In other words…

Trying to live a mostly one sided life…seeking more support than challenge…more happiness than sadness….more pleasure than pain…more praise than criticism…and being more reasonable than unreasonable…is a certain recipe for living a life of desperation.

It also keeps you in fear.

And bizarre as this seems…

The fear is actually caused by worrying about what others think about you…which in this case are the challenges, the sadness, the pains, the criticism, and being unreasonable.

Therefore…

When you embrace both sides equally and know you’re going to get both sides no matter what you do…as I’ve said many times before…it just “rolls off your back.”

I call this wearing the bulls eye of life.

And like I’ve also said many times in other discussions, the more you get of one side…the more you’ll get of the other.

Again, keep in mind…

This all centers around you knowing what you want…which centers around being unreasonable…which centers embracing both sides of life equally.

Also realize…

This is an ongoing lifelong process because the outside pressures of certain people and institutions are continuously doing everything they can to stifle this within you.

It’s not a “bad” thing.

Believe it or not, it’s the way the world is trying to get you to declare how important you are…

To declare how much you do matter…

And how much you’re going to put up with to be persistent, resilient, and relentless enough to stand out and be the special and unique person that you are.

What I’ll be speaking about today with you is inspired by someone’s story I came across a few years ago.
In fact this story has even amazed many doctors and scientists to the point where they felt the need to study this person.

Who am I referring to?

Her name is Jill Price and she is also known as the woman who can’t forget.

Price who is now 46 is able to recite details of every day of her life since she was 14. She can remember specific details of what was going on, where she was, and on what specific dates these moments took place.

The reason I first found this to be interesting is because I can relate to it in many ways.

For most of my life I’ve been able to remember specific dates, where I was, what was going on, and as time has gone on they become even clearer.

In fact this even translates to the many wonderful comments I receive from each of you, the dates you sent them on, what was said, and so on.

So with these thoughts in mind I was thinking, “well if Jill Price can have an excellent memory and if I can have an excellent memory, so can you.”

Why is this important and how can it help you in your life?

That’s what I’ll be speaking about today while posing the question,

“Can you remember everything you do?”

Let’s take a deeper look at this in your weekly wealth tips:

1. Never forget vs. Always remember

How many times have you used the phrase, “I’ll never forget_______?” How many times have you used the phrase, “I’ll always remember_______?” Even though we may use these interchangeably they are different.

Think of the many different times that you’ve used either of these two phrases to state something. More often than not whenever we use, “I’ll never forget” it is usually towards something we’re emotionally charged about in a negative way. This isn’t true 100% of the time but have you ever noticed that when you were upset about something that was negative that you used “I’ll never forget_________?”

Conversely, when something positive has taken place in your life, have you noticed that you had a tendency to use, “I’ll always remember _________” more often than “I’ll never forget?” And again you may not do this 100% of the time but these are trends that I notice with others.

What’s the point of all this?

It is wise to be aware of your languaging, especially when it comes to things you’ll remember from your past. I used to use “I’ll never forget” much more often than “I’ll always remember” and as interesting as it sounds, ever since I started to use “I’ll always remember” I started to be much more focused and very clear in things I would remember.

This could perhaps explain why my memory of the details of specific events, dates, and what was going on at the time has gotten better over time.

So how can this translate to the type of success you want to achieve…

And would you want to be able to remember everything you do?

2. Memory and success

Even though Jill Price can remember specific details of her life since the age of 14, does that necessarily translate to success? The answer is “yes” and “no” because it does depend on the person. It is one thing to have an exceptional memory of things, but keep in mind that it’s another thing as to whether you’re putting that to use in the form of you having the type of success you want in the areas of life most important to you.

In fact, your memory and the ability to remember things in specific detail and to the highest degree will depend on your values or what is most important to you. This is very important to be aware of as it relates to your ability to remember things in such a way that you achieve the level of success you seek.

It is very wise to be able to remember things, whether they are positive or negative. Remember, both serve a purpose in your life.

Many times people will only want to remember the positive and forget about the negative, and then you’ll have some people who will only remember the negative and forget the positive.

The way the human mind works is that it remembers both and it does so simultaneously, even though you may not be aware of that. Your ability to realize this and incorporate it into your daily life is an incredibly important factor in determining your level of success.

So with that being said, back to the original question of the day…

“Can you remember everything you do?”

And the answer is yes.

3. Your amazing journey

There are many people who are amazed at what Jill Price is able to do, but guess what? There are plenty of people out there who are amazed at what you can do. Take a look at your life’s journey all the way up to the present and recall those moments when someone saw you as being amazing in something you did.

In fact, the more you can go back and remember things, the more you’ll even see how amazing you are.

Now of course you want to do this in a poised manner, without getting too “up” or “elated” or as some would say, “having an ego.” This isn’t about having a “big ego.” It is about realizing the tremendous amount of value you contribute to the world…

And it’s also about how you can pass that torch to others so they can do the same.

Being able to remember everything you do gives you a chance to really see all the wonderful things you have done in your life and how you helped others do the same.

Your amazing journey is unique and really represents the magnificence and brilliance of who you are…

And one of the best ways to do that is to remember everything that you do.

What I want you to remember is that you do matter and truly make a positive difference in the world.