If someone were to tell you that people feel good during moments of anger what would you say?
You probably wouldn’t believe them…
Especially if they tell you that the more angrier a person gets the more they feel good.
Because after all, any time you’ve felt angry over something (and especially someone) did “feeling good” ever cross your mind? Probably not.
In fact, this was a scene that was all too familiar in my life.
Whether it had to do with people who broke their promises to me…or someone not doing things the way I wanted…or a situation I had expected to go one way and then turned out the opposite, it didn’t matter because it still left me feeling angry.
And most people thought this was because of something that it wasn’t…just another person having “anger issues.”
These moments of anger weren’t due to having “anger issues”…even though it looked that way on the surface.
It was due to actually feeling good even though I wasn’t aware of it during those anger moments…
And the same is true for you during your moments of anger.
Now you may be wondering….”How?”
Well, it starts and is cleverly hidden because of that “F” word again…fantasy.
Except in this case it involves something I call an “anger fantasy.”
And it’s here where these “anger issues” begin and end…and are able to be avoided to begin with.
So the question is…
“How much is the anger fantasy involved in your life”
…And what can you do to get rid of it before it takes over your life in ways you don’t want?
1. Delusional illusions- There’s an unusual phenomena that exists during the lifetime of all human beings. It’s this notion of attributing why things happen to something other than what the cause really is. Such is the case when it comes to
dealing with anger issues…or as some would call anger management.
This is where the “feeling good” part comes in during moments of anger…in the form of trying to live a fantasy life.
Because it’s this “feeling good fantasy” mindset that is at the cause of why people have so called “anger issues.”
And with it comes the birth of the anger fantasy…which is the result of trying to live a one-sided life while expecting one-sided outcomes.
Back when I was 20 I was in a relationship with a girl I really liked. We got along very well. The only issue…her parents felt the age difference was too much (she was 15). The relationship ended.
This left me feeling angry to the point where it literally turned into a family feud (we lived next door to each other).
At the time I didn’t realize why I was so angry.
It was simple…
My one sided fantasy—of being in the relationship and having everyone involved agree with me—wasn’t being met.
Said another way…
My “feeling good fantasy” of things that were “supposed” to always go my way wasn’t being met…because when her parents put a stop to the relationship I saw nothing but drawbacks to it. And it was this plus my childish, immature fantasy that things “had to” go MY way that was the cause of my anger…although at the time I didn’t know it.
This is where the anger started…what I call the anger fantasy.
And whether we’re talking about this situation I went through or one you’ve gone through (or are currently going through) the same thing still applies…
Trying to live in this one-sided way is delusional. I call it delusional illusions because it’s not how the world (the Universe) is designed to work.
The world is designed to work in a two-sided manner.
There are an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks to EVERY situation you encounter throughout your entire life. This is a Universal Law that applies to ALL people.
And the more someone is addicted to the fantasy of trying to live a one-sided life the more anger someone will have.
This reminds me of a quote from a college professor I had…
“Anger masks hurt.”
That’s true and the “hurt” he was referring to is actually the one-sided fantasy not being met. This is where all anger issues originate.
When you take an honest look at any situation you’ve ever been in during your own moments of anger you’ll see this every time.
The bottom line…
The greater the fantasy the greater the anger.
But what’s fascinating in all of this is that anger serves a purpose in your life…it’s actually a gift and one that most people are never aware of.
Before I get to that…
There’s one more part of what’s involved in this anger fantasy…and is also why people get angry to begin with.
And it has to do with something that ultimately all people want…the truth.
2. The angry truth- Another bizarre phenomena that exists among the human race involves wanting something but not wanting it. What I’m talking about here is the truth.
Every person in the world wants the truth…whether it has to do with someone making a promise to them…whether it involves finding out certain information about whatever it is that’s most important to them…and everything else in between.
We all want the truth…you want it…and so do I.
Strange as it seems, at the same time most people don’t want the truth.
Because again it goes back to what I’ve been saying…most people try to live a one-sided life. They are continuously seeking more happiness than sadness, more pleasure than pain, more joy than sorrow, and more ease than difficulty.
And what happens as a result…
When the opposite side shows up—sadness, pain, sorrow, and difficulty—they’ll get angry…hence the anger fantasy (Naturally this builds up over time as each person has a different tolerance level so to speak).
So, how does the truth come into all of this?
Living in a world of truth involves embracing both sides of life equally. It is knowing that no matter what you do that you’ll get equal amounts of happiness and sadness, pleasure and pain, joy and sorrow, ease and difficulty, people liking and disliking you, and so on.
The more someone tries to live a one-sided life in a two-sided world the angrier they’ll get. This is also known as living a lie…because the truth sees both sides equally.
So how does this apply to you? In several ways.
How many times have you tried to show someone the truth about something and they got angry about it? I’m sure many times.
Most people will see this as “The truth hurts”…which is true. What’s actually going on here is the “cracking” or “shattering” of the one-sided fantasy the person was trying to live by.
This is the anger fantasy…and this is when you’ll see someone possibly even go into a rage of anger. The anger you see in someone is actually a “withdrawal” symptom of their one-sided illusions being “cracked.”
And it all centers around the truth being revealed.
I call this “The angry truth” because far too many people are denying the truth—of people, of the different situations they’re in, of themselves, and of life—and in the process are living a lie.
When you’re in a situation like this and you’re the one revealing the truth about something to someone…quite often that person will accuse you of being negative…or they may try and “turn the tables” on you and blame you for something they themselves have blatantly done.
It’s not about you…it’s about them and their own one-sided fantasy.
As you already know “the truth sets you free”…and it does. But the way it actually does quite often comes with the “anger” as well…what you now know as the “angry truth.”
This is also true about your own life.
How many times did you find out something to be true—whether on your own or someone pointed it out to you—and you knew it to be true. Didn’t you get angry about it at first?
We’ve all experienced this. When you did…it was nothing more than the “angry truth” being revealed.
What you also most likely didn’t know—and most people don’t—is that anger is a gift in your life.
Something you didn’t expect to hear…right?
Let’s see how…
3. The gift of anger- There are certain things in life that at first seem like they serve no purpose whatsoever, but then over a certain amount of time the “light bulb” goes off and you get that “aha” moment. Sometimes these are obvious. Other times they’re not and take longer to realize.
Sadly, for some people they never realize it, will repeat the same patterns over and over again…and then attribute why things happen to them to something other than what it really is.
And this is certainly the case with anger and how to control anger.
What most people never realize is that anger is a gift. It serves a specific purpose in your life and in the lives of every human being.
Something you probably never heard or thought of before…right?
It stands to reason because this is something we’re not taught.
So, what is this gift that anger gives you?
First, it’s “testing you” to see how you handle different situations throughout your life and in the process tests your patience.
It’s getting you to “crack” that one sided fantasy that things “have to” always or most of the time go your way.
And no matter how you look at it or want to believe, you’ll continuously be put in the same situations you don’t want to be in and repeat the same patterns over and over again until you embrace the fact that all situations are two-sided…that they have an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks.
Once you see this they’ll be no anger. They’ll be nothing but truth.
And that’s the second gift of anger…discovering the truth…the truth about you, about other people, and about different situations you encounter throughout your life.
Now of course this doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything and everyone and give up who you are…or that you just “accept” something you don’t believe in and give in to others.
What it does mean is that you see both sides to people and situations equally—having an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks—and in the process the truth is revealed.
And let’s face it…
Sometimes you’ll like what you see and other times you won’t…and that’s ok.
As you already know things won’t always go your way. Everyone pretty much knows this because if they didn’t you wouldn’t have so many people showing their anger or having what many call “anger issues.”
No matter how you look at it, over the course of your life it does balance out…and the only way you can see it not doing so is if you hold on to the idea that life is supposed to be one-sided…which by now you know it’s not.
And yes, they’ll be times when those feelings of anger come up. It’s only natural because as humans we all want things to go our way and when it doesn’t that “urge” to let it out comes up.
But now you know how to control the anger…thanks to the gift that anger gives you…
A gift that is ultimately designed to get you to discover who you are and why you do the things that you do.
A gift that allows you to “dig deep” and to find out why you’re here.
A gift that gives you insights and answers to the different challenges you’ll deal with throughout your life.
A gift that “wakes” you up to what makes you the special and unique person you are…a person that matters and is an important part of the world.
There’s an epic battle going on right now as we speak.
It’s a battle you go through every day.
Sometimes you’re aware of it. Other times you’re not.
And it’s one that has two major combatants that are trying to take control of your life…each with opposite intentions in mind.
The two combatants…
Karma and the truth
…and the two couldn’t be more different from one another even though most people think they’re the same.
Now you may be thinking about what these intentions are because of something you’ve heard people say, believe, and live their lives by.
And it’s the statement…
“What goes around comes around. If you put out ‘good karma’ you get ‘good’ in return and if you put out ‘bad karma’ you get ‘bad’ in return.”
Along with this is also the famous one of, “Karma’s a bitch”, plus all the other karma sayings that imply the notion that “it’ll get you one way or the other.’
Sounds good on the surface and makes sense….right?
Well there’s something that comes along and is in your life 24/7 that doesn’t agree with this.
It’s called the Truth…
Along with its intentions that are the complete opposite of what karma allegedly has in store for you.
And the two are on a collision course that lead to an epic clash.
So, what is this clash and…”What happens when karma collides with the truth?”
1. Clash of the Titans- It’s a scene all too familiar. You’re nice to someone. They start off being nice to you. And then something happens along the way and they
did something you didn’t like that went “way over the line.” You became angry and so pissed off that the thought of them literally made you want to throw up.
Next, you’ll find one of the karma quotes that says “karma will get them” and you’ll
wish that upon them.
Along with this you may rely on what I call the “silent karma” quote that says something like, “Karma is the best revenge.”
In either case you’ll look to karma as a way to get back at them.
And let’s face it…
You’ve been there at some point, so have I, as well as people you know. This seems like a natural response for most people.
It’s not the truth.
And this is where karma and the truth collide.
I call it the clash of the titans…
Because you have two colossal forces fighting to take control of your life. The question is, which one will win out…relying on karma or living your life according to truth?
And the fact is…
The two of them don’t mix. It’s similar to what happens when water tries to mix with oil…they separate. The same is true with karma and the truth.
When it comes to water and oil trying to mix, of course there’s a reason for that…it has to do with the chemical structure of water and oil.
There’s also a reason why karma and the truth don’t mix. It has nothing to do with a chemical structure per se…
But it does have to do with the structure of karma versus the structure of how the world (the Universe) has always, is right now, and always will function.
What I’m talking about is…approaching life from a one-sided versus a two-sided perspective.
The typical karma that most people rely on is attempting to see the world from a one sided perspective.
The truth which relies on seeing life from a two-sided perspective…which is how the world (Universe) has and always will be designed to work. It’s an unbreakable structure. And only the one sided fantasies that far too many people try to impose on the world is what gives rise to ultimately relying on karma…plus the side effects that come along with it.
2. The Karmic Fantasy- Somewhere along the way in the history of man and womankind somebody came up with (and started promoting) the idea that people can live one sided lives.
The notion that you can have more happiness than sadness, have people be more kind than cruel to you, having people be more nice than mean along with being more honest than dishonest to you, along with having more peace than turmoil in life…and so on.
It sounds appealing on the surface.
It’s never has, isn’t right now, or never will work that way…even though they’ll be moments when it seems like it does.
What this approach that far too many people are trying to live by does is…it’s the breathing ground for relying on the type of karma most people live by. As a result it runs their lives, and quite often without them even realizing it.
This is what I call the Karmic Fantasy…
Because it’s the mindset of, “If somebody doesn’t always or most of the time act one-sided to me (by being more nice than mean, more kind than cruel, more honest than dishonest) then they’re not a ‘good’ person and karma will get them.
This is a fantasy because ALL people have both sides to their nature…and in certain situations the so called “bad” or “negative” side (being mean, cruel, dishonest) is actually needed.
Now of course I’m not saying to purposely be mean, cruel, and dishonest to people…
What I am saying is that in certain moments these are needed…as long as it benefits a certain situation and the people involved.
A perfect example of this is what took place with me back in 2008. I was friends with a gal named Heather. We were close friends and business partners for a year and a half.
Then she met a guy she barely knew and from that point on both our friendship and business relationship deteriorated to the point that each ended within 4 months of her meeting this person.
During this time it put a strain on our friendship and ultimately led to us going our separate ways. When this first started happening I perceived Heather as being mean, dishonest, and not following through on what we had agreed upon regarding our business partnership…
But then I took a step back and began looking at the benefits of her—that is my perception of her—being mean, dishonest, and not following through.
-It gave me the opportunity to run my business the way I wanted
-It taught me how to be resourceful in my business
-It tested my patience in dealing with people in general
-It got me to “dig deep” and discover my unique creativity…one of which allowed me to become (in the eyes of many) an exceptional writer. This ultimately led to the writing of my first book.
-It taught me how to become more business savvy.
These are just a few of the benefits that came about from someone’s perceived meanness, dishonest, and not following through on an agreement.
And once I saw these benefits I was more focused and appreciated Heather for what she contributed to my life. It didn’t mean we “had to” be friends or stay in touch (which we never did), or that I let her “off the hook”…
What it meant was that she contributed to my life in the way she did.
There was no need for relying on karma. What for? Since what I perceived her as doing had as many benefits as drawbacks was it necessary to rely on so called “karma?” Obviously not.
Not only that…
But this also brings out the truth…in people and of the different situations you experience throughout your life (as it ultimately did in my situation with Heather. I’ll come back to this in a few minutes).
And it’s only when this Karmic Fantasy is being projected into a world that is designed to be two –sided…that’s where this clash of the titans takes place…when karma collides with the truth.
It’s also the difference in how your life plays out physically, mentality, and emotionally…
Because if you’re relying on karma you’ll also get the mood swings that frequently come along with it which include the anger, the frustration, and the aggravation.
And quite often this involves getting that “splitting headache”, the “knot in your stomach”, and just an overall draining of your energy.
Is this any way to live your life…of course not.
Thankfully there’s another option you have to live your life by…it’s called the truth.
3. Living the truth lifestyle- Sometimes in life there are certain things that we as humans like to believe but in reality it’s not that way at all. A perfect example of this is realizing what the truth is.
This goes back to what I said earlier.
The bottom line here is…
The world we live in is a world of truth. Always has been…always will be. The reason far too many people don’t realize this is because most people continue to try and impose the one sided fantasies I spoke about earlier on to it. Then when things don’t go their way they try and rely on “bad karma” (and “good karma” when things do go their way).
Living this way is not living what I call the truth lifestyle. That’s living the Karmic Fantasy lifestyle.
In order to rely on karma there has to be that one-sided mentality. Karma can only exist during this one-sided mindset This is not living according to truth because the truth sees both sides to situations and people equally (where there are an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks, positives and negatives).
Once you start living from this two-sided perspective karma dissolves and you live according to truth…what I call the truth lifestyle.
And the two cannot co-exist.
This brings up a quote of mine:
“When you live according to truth ‘good’ and ‘bad’ karma does not exist.”
This is why there is a collision that takes place when karma meets the truth.
Relying on karma denies the truth of life…of people, of situations, and even of yourself. Plus it’s not a healthy way to live.
Living according to truth is a healthy way to live even though it may not seem that way at first.
Not only that…
But when you live according to truth you get greater insights along with the solutions to the different problems you’re looking to overcome and solve.
This occurs because of a fascinating fact that is true of EVERYTHING in life and that is…
Life and all the events that take place—the reason why things happen—are ALL due to cause and effect…not karma.
There is a cause for everything you see on the outside (the effect) and these events as I said earlier are two-sided (they have an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks, positives and negatives)…but if you’re not aware of this along with the facts and details involved it can be easy to fall prey to relying on karma.
This is exactly what happened with the gal Heather I told you about earlier.
About three months after meeting this new guy she decided to move in with him. She moved across the country to Seattle. After living with him for barely three months he kicked her out and she basically had nowhere to go and in a place she had never lived.
When I heard about this I immediately resisted the idea of relying on karma and the notion that, “Karma’s a bitch and that what goes around comes around and that’s what Heather gets for treating me the way she did.”
Instead I immediately realized that if I came from this “Karmic Fantasy mindset” that it would run my life because I would have still seen what happened between me and Heather as having more drawbacks than benefits.
It would have denied the truth of all that took place…because there was a cause as to why she got kicked out…it wasn’t due to so called “bad karma.”
Knowing Heather as well as I did I knew the details of what took place in her past relationships and why those didn’t work out…and the same pattern occurred with this guy who ended up kicking her out.
This is why what happened with her happened. It was the unresolved issues from past relationships that carried over which was the ultimate cause of why this guy kicked her out…not some mystical, fantasy seeking “bad karma.”
As with every other event that most people almost always attribute to “good” or (as in this case) “bad” karma there is a cause that is responsible for the effect…for what we all see on the outside.
And if you don’t get the facts and details of why events take place while knowing there’s always a cause for why things happen it’ll be easy to think “karma” was responsible…while denying the truth.
The world we live in is a world of truth because of the way it was designed…to be two-sided. And like I said earlier, it’s when people project the one-sided fantasies on to the world is when karma becomes involved.
Not only does this (karma) deny the truth of different events you experience, but it also denies the truth of who you are.
You are not here to rely on karma.
You’re here to live according to truth.
Life is not a series of “mystical coincidences” or random “freakish events”…
And the same is true of you.
You’re here for a reason and a very important one…
To bring value to the world…
To make a difference…
And doing so in a way that shows the world who you really are.
This is the truth of who you are and why you’re here.
No matter how you look at it…it’s true.
And there’s a scary part to it…and possibly the feeling of security as well.
It just depends on you.
Along with this comes the strangest part of all…
The fact that you can know the “scary part” is going on in your life and still be content…even though it leaves you feeling like there’s no way out.
So what am I talking about?
Your life…and the path it’s going down.
Now if you happen to be somebody that is not feeling fulfilled in your life…and know it’s time to do something about it…
You still find yourself not doing anything about it…and watching the same old thing go by day after day…
What’s stopping you from doing anything about it?
If today was your last day on this planet, is this how you would want your last 24 hours to be?
Let’s say today wasn’t the last day of your life…
What happens if nothing changes in your life?
1. Decision diamonds- Life wouldn’t be life without decisions. Of course that’s pretty obvious. And this also includes the decisions you didn’t make…the ones that quite often leave you saying, “I wish I _________” or “My life would have been better off if I had only done _________.”
What isn’t so obvious and goes unnoticed is what’s really going on during all of these decisions you made and didn’t make.
There’s two things going on…
One, every decision you make has an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks. At first it seems like “no way.”
When you take the time to scan through your life and look closely…while being honest with yourself…you’ll see this pretty easily.
And two, as a result…
You’ll realize there’s no such things as mistakes.
See, all of what I just said comes down to knowing what your values are. Or said another way, knowing what it is that’s most important to you…what you “love” and are “inspired” to be doing.
Because when you realize this you’ll know what I said above…you’ll see the benefits and drawbacks to the decisions you made…equally.
And it’s this that gives you the courage to be confident in being more certain about making decisions that in the past you would have hesitated on…or not made at all.
This is the first step to turning your life around and leads in to the next part…
2. The people pleasing syndrome- Whether you’re aware of it or not…and most people aren’t aware of it…the situations you’re currently in that you don’t want to be in has much to do with you wanting to please people.
I know of a “then” attorney that did everything in his life just trying to please his father.
He became an attorney because his father wanted him to. He got married to a certain woman because his father wanted him to. Where he lived was where his father wanted him to live.
And no matter what he did to gain the approval of his father…it was never enough.
As a result…
This man’s health got to the point where he suffered a heart attack. After his father passed away he found out his father left him with unpaid debts. This led to his law practice going out of business…which led to his wife leaving him and taking the kids.
It reached the point where he was basically ready to take his own life.
And then he realized with his father gone…there was no one left to please anymore.
This was a revelation for him that turned his life around.
He realized that practicing law wasn’t what he loved…and that the woman he married wasn’t the type of woman he wanted to be with.
And this gave him a new lease on life to do what he truly loved…fixing up classic cars and selling them.
So now he was doing what he loved and what also happened…he met a new woman that was his “perfect” match and they ended up getting married.
What it all comes down to is this…
So many people are so worried about wanting to please others they’re infatuated with…they’ll do anything to follow through on it…even if it means “mortgaging” their life away.
And strange as it sounds…
It’s the infatuating over someone that’s at the root cause of it all.
Because after all, do you ever find yourself wanting to please someone you resent and despise…of course not.
When it comes to breaking the “people pleasing syndrome”, just know that no matter what you do you’ll have people liking and disliking…supporting and challenging…praising and criticizing you…equally.
And this includes friends, acquaintances, strangers, and certainly family.
Be mindful of this and stand your ground because it’s the very thing needed for you to turn your life around.
Speaking of your life…
3. What is your life- I’m sure you already know that life…especially your life…is about change. Now at first you’re likely to think it’s about changing for the “better” or “worse”…right? Because after all this is the conventional wisdom you always hear.
That’s not true.
And the reason your life is not about changing for the “better” or “worse” goes back to what I said earlier…there’s an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks to every situation you come across.
The same is true about changing your life around.
Your life is about knowing what it is that you’d love to be, do, and have.
Once you know what this is you’ve answered the question, “what is your life?”
Of course your answer is going to be different than somebody else’s because you’re unique.
Along with this also remember…
All humans have every trait (4600 total that are positive and negative). But it’s the way you express these traits based on your uniqueness and what you’re here to be, do, and have is what defines what your life is.
And once you know what your life is, you’ll also know what you want to be remembered for.
Because when you get right down to it…there’s something inside of you that you want the world to see…that leads to what you want to be remembered for.
And in doing so you want to keep asking “why.” Because when you have enough reasons “why” in what you want…and there’s enough pain from how your life will turn out if you don’t do anything about it…and you know what you “love” doing…while not worrying about what others think of you…
You’ll turn your life around.
Along with it you’ll discover how your magnificence and brilliance is a special gift to the world in a way that serves both you and others to be the change you seek in the world.
What happens when you watch a movie on TV?
You see a story that has a script to it.
It has a beginning, an end, and the events that take place in between.
But sometimes it doesn’t go the way as planned…even though it may seem like it’s supposed to at first.
In many ways this sounds like your life…right?
Now there’s something else you quite often don’t see in the movie that also happens to be in your life as well.
And it has to do with how your life turns out…even though it’s something most people do anything in their power to avoid like cancer.
Not only is this something that can strike the fear of death into you, but it’s also the very thing needed to turn your life around when it seems like all hope is lost.
What I’m talking about is “The unknown”
And more specifically…the Great Unknown.
Let’s face it…
It’s only natural as a human being to want to know how things will work out…the script of how things are to go in your life and having it be predictable.
But as you already know it quite often doesn’t go that way. And with it comes the eventual fear along with the unknown of what today, tomorrow, and the future brings.
What happens as a result…
Feeling paralyzed of what to do which quite often leads to giving up.
This is the best time to “dive in” and discover this great unknown because it’s where the solutions to the biggest problems in your life are.
So the question is…
“What (and where) exactly is this great unknown in your life”
…and how do you discover it?
1. Navigating the unknown- There are two things that you, I, and every human being will always face in life no matter what and these are right at the backbone of dealing with the unknown…making choices and taking risks.
With that said here’s a quote of mine…
“Life is full of choices. One of these choices is taking risks. And unless you’re willing to sometimes take risks your life will never change.”
Because many of the most important choices you’ll make in life comes with an increasing amount of risk…whether they have to do with your family, your career, the people you choose to associate with, your finances, and even who you are as a person.
And by knowing how to be courageous and brave enough to make these choices is what leads to discovering the greatest reward of all. It’s life’s most treasured payoff you’ll get as a human which is only attainable by navigating through the unknown.
I’ll come back to what this is in a few minutes.
But first the question here is…
How do you effectively navigate through the unknown?
Well, it’s the same way for all human beings…
By embracing life from a two-sided perspective.
Every situation you come across, whether you take risks or not, will have two sides to it.
No matter what you do you’ll have people liking and disliking you, supporting and challenging you, praising and criticizing you, putting you up and putting you down, being nice and mean to you…EQUALLY.
And the same is true of yourself. You’ll have moments of feeling happy and sad…equally. Moments of building yourself up and putting yourself down…equally.
There’s no escaping this.
And the interesting part of this…
Whether you step in to the unknown or go through life “playing it safe” and trying to avoid the unknown…you’ll get it anyway.
This brings up another quote that comes to mind…
“The real risk in life is doing nothing.”
It’s wise to make it a point to take risks because this is what gives you the courage to navigate through and “step in to”, take on, and go through the great unknown in your life.
And since you’ll get the both sides of life that I just mentioned, then you may as well “dive in” anyway…right?
Now of course when I say to take risks I don’t mean reckless, out of control, and highly emotional risks…
What I do mean are “healthy risks” that see the different situations involved from a two-sided perspective, along with seeing the equal amount of benefits and drawbacks of each.
When you approach it like this, you dance your way through the unknown and out the other side…which is the greatest reward I spoke about earlier.
In fact, there’s two greatest rewards.
Let’s look at the first one now.
2. Destination…Truth- Naturally there are as many different life journeys as there are people in the world. The nice part of this is the fact that your journey is unique and special. What is the same for everyone however is that all life’s journeys have a destination…
…And it’s here where the core of the great unknown in your life exists.
This is where the first greatest reward of your life lives.
Because it’s here where you discover the truth…the truth of who you are, why you’re here, what you’re made of, and what you’re willing to go through.
It’s also where you discover the other different truths…the truths of the many different events you go through in your life.
If there’s such a thing in life as an ultimate destination in life…this is it.
As much as a life reward this is, far too many people avoid what it takes to get there…stepping in to the great unknown.
Even though all human beings want the truth, most are afraid of it. They avoid it like cancer. And ironically, more often than not it has to do with stepping in to and discover the great unknown in their lives.
This again goes back to what I said earlier about taking risks…along with making the choices to take those risks.
And one of the main reasons for this is because most people are striving for a one-sided fantasy life…seeking more happiness than sadness, more pleasure than pain, more kindness than cruelness.
The world is not…was never…and will never work that way. It was never designed to in the first place.
It’s designed to work in a two-sided manner…and this is where you discover all truths in life…along with the great unknown in your life.
No matter how you go about life, there is no getting around making the choices that involve taking risks…which will always include having an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks to whatever is included in that “risky” situation.
And this is something I’ve certainly experienced in my life as well…especially when starting my own business. But it didn’t end there as I still to this day deal with many different types of situations that involve stepping in to the great unknown.
Not only have I dealt with it in my business, but in my personal life as well.
During my life I’ve moved several times, and with each move comes a new unknown in my life to deal with.
There are the unknowns of what the new place I move to will be like…who will I end up meeting and becoming friends with…how will I adjust to a new surrounding.
After many of these moves I ended up moving back to New Jersey. And even with those moves back to a place I’m familiar with came many unknowns as well.
The people who know me wonder why I move so much and see it as a disadvantage…but there are an equal amount of advantages to it as well…such as being conditioned to deal with and navigate through the great unknown in my life.
And the same is true for you as it relates to your life.
Once you make it a habit of seeing all events and moments in your life as having an equal amount of benefits and drawbacks (two-sided) you’ll condition yourself in how to anticipate dealing with “future events” before they come up.
Because whether you’re looking at the past, present, or future events in your life you still go about how you see them the same way…from the two-sided perspective I’ve been speaking about.
As a result…
You’ll uncover the different truths in life I mentioned earlier along with the second greatest reward life gives you.
3. The hidden blessings abyss- Now of course there’s the other side of what happens as a result of taking the different risks in your life…the rewards. And what’s fascinating about this is the fact that even if the risks you take don’t go the way you want you still get an equal reward.
This brings us back to the second of those great rewards that you get…
Finding the hidden blessings in your life.
And it’s here where you find the true meaning of your life.
It’s here where the things you may see at first as making no sense start to make sense.
It’s here where you realize why things happen the way they do.
And it’s also here where you discover not only the hidden order in the chaos of life, but what the great unknown is in your life.
This brings up another quote of mine:
“Instead of fearing and avoiding the unknown, look forward to the hidden blessings that the unknown reveals.”
This is what I call the hidden blessings abyss because within the great unknown of your life is an endless supply of hidden blessings that are there waiting for you to find them.
One such example in my life took place back in 2006. That’s when I had the failed business partnership that ended up costing me over $50,000. This resulted in my transitioning out of the fitness industry and into what I do today as a human potential specialist.
As a result…
I discovered who I am, why I’m here, and it conditioned me to effectively deal with the many different unknowns that have occurred in my life since.
Your life is full of hidden blessings…all designed to help you discover what your life is all about.
As scary and risky things may seem at times the rewards that come out of it for you make it all worth it…especially the hidden blessings you discover along the way.
Life is meant to be lived and in a way that is unique to who you are.
You’re here to find out what makes you the unique and special person you are.
Now when I say special I don’t mean feeling “entitled”…
What I do mean is… what it is about you that brings value to the world…and in a way that helps others do the same in their lives.
And doing it in a way that allows you to shine…to be the person you were put in this world to be.
You do matter…
You do make a difference…
And you do deserve to be loved and appreciated for who you are and all you do.