Beliefnet
Because This Is Your Life

As difficult and challenging as things may appear to be sometimes, it is in most cases something which seems very simple and not obvious which makes all the difference.

This is also true as it relates to your life and how it plays out.

The difference between “success” and “failure”, moving forward and moving backwards, along with living the type of life you want versus living your life in desperation, comes down to what seems like those “little big” things, which aren’t so obvious at first.

Today, I’d like to speak about one of these “little big” things.

In fact I’ll even say that this is something which is a very big thing, but on the surface may not appear to be.

What I’m referring to is,

“Are you motivated or inspired?”

These may seem like a choice of one or two words and on the surface they are.

However there is a big difference between them and it is this difference which can and does shape the way your life and beyond plays out.

1. What language do you speak

Simply stated, people who are motivated need outside influences to get them to do something which isn’t high on their values or important to them. People who are inspired rely on their own inner vision and are living according to their own values or what is important to them.

How can you tell if you’re motivated or inspired?

You can start by listening to your own language. Anytime you’re saying, “I have to”, “I’m supposed to”, “I’ve got to”, “I should”, and other similar phrases, it is a clear sign of doing something that isn’t of high importance to you, even though you may say it is.

As a result you’ll also find yourself saying, “I can’t”, “I’m not”, “I don’t know” most of the time.

This is the language of someone who is “trying” to be motivated.

Conversely, when you’re saying, “I love to”, “I’m inspired to”, “I’m blessed to”, and “This is what I’ve always dreamed of doing”, it is a clear sign of doing something that is most important and true to you.

As a result of this languaging you’ll find yourself saying, “I can”, “I am”, and “I know” most of the time.

This is the language of someone who is inspired and on track to doing what they love.

So which language are you speaking?

2. Action reaction

When you’re motivated you’ll have a tendency to react and when you’re inspired you’ll have a high probability to act. The difference between these two is that one involves taking “any action” (motivation) and the other involves taking “inspired action” or as I like to say, “action that matters.”

Those who are taking inspired action take the time to plan out the details of what they would love to do. Even if they don’t know all of the details at first or the exact “how”, they’ll still have a plan that is driven by inspiration and they’ll refine and fill in more of the specific details along the way.

What counts the most here is that whatever it is that you’re doing, to make sure it is driven by inspiration rather than motivation.

People who are inspired will do whatever it takes to achieve what they would love to be, do, and have. People who are driven by motivation have a high probability of giving up at some point.

3. The two sides of an inspiring life

The people who live the most inspiring lives are the ones who expect and embrace both sides equally. They know that they’ll be equal amounts of support and challenge, pleasure and pain, ease and difficulty, in pursuit of their purpose. This also includes having people who will like and dislike them equally.

The inspired person is also someone who is both happy and sad, nice and mean, giving and taking, while also being a saint and a sinner.

People who are inspired are poised, present, patient, powerful, and are living their true purpose. A big part of this has to do with realizing that each person is two sided and that we all live in a two sided world.

And this of course applies to you as well. There may be days when you “lift” yourself up and then there are days when you’ll tear yourself down. In fact every human being cannot build themselves up without also simultaneously putting themselves down.

Is that a bad thing?

Of course not.

This is yet another aspect of what makes up the magnificence and brilliance of who you are.

It’s also involved in guiding you to realize the tremendous amounts of value you have to offer the world through your uniqueness.

Regardless of where you’re at in your life right now, you can certainly turn it around and go in the positive direction.

It is a matter of living your life from inspiration and as strange as it may sound FEAR, with FEAR meaning…

Feeling Empowered And Ready.

Now is the time for you to be ready and take that next empowering step in your life and fulfill your inspired destiny.

How can something that seems like it’s hidden from you be the same thing that actually is quite visible…even at the same time?

What could possibly be something that feels like it’s buried 1000  feet in the ground…also be the same thing that appears to be a foot away from you?

Strange as it seems…

It’s also like wearing a black blindfold that you can see straight through.

And it has to do with your life.

More  specifically…

Those moments in your life that create your destiny…the path you’re designed to go down.

And this can either be the way you want or the complete  opposite of what you want.

Yet…

No matter how you look at it, it still comes down to the moments that in some way have you at a “fork in the road”…

Which leads to your life turning around.

And whether you’re aware of it or not…

It’s happened…may be happening right now…and is about to happen to you.
What am I talking about?

The turning point in your life.And with it the question…

What has been the turning point in your life?

1. Say it is so

It’s interesting because there are times during your life when you’ll say “I don’t know” to something that you “do know” the answer to.

Case in point…

The turning point in your life.

When you think about what the turning point has been in your life, if you find yourself saying “I don’t know” then that is a clear sign you do know.

How so?

Because the only way you could say “I don’t know” is if you’re comparing it in some way to what you “do know.”

And this is true  with anything you say “I don’t know” to.

As it relates to what the turning point in your life has been…what is it?

When you take the time to look…especially beyond the “obvious” you’ll see it…and rather clearly.

It may not be in the exact way you originally thought it would have showed up in…but you’ll know because you’ll get that “I got it” feeling.

And what’s also interesting with this is that it could have been something that happened a day…a week…a month…or possibly even years ago.

This is what happened with me.

I’ve mentioned this story in the past.

I went out for the baseball team my second year in high school.

In order  to make the team you had to make two cuts.

I made the first cut.

When it came time for the final cuts the coach read off the names of the kids who didn’t make the team.

I thought I made the team because he didn’t read my name (he initially stopped)…and then he read my name off last.

And right after he did, he said, “you have more  guts  than anyone I’ve ever seen.

Come out for the team next year and you’ll make it.”

Now while I didn’t make the team…and never played baseball again after that…this moment became a turning point in my life.

Why?

Because it, in a sense, gave me the self confidence to take on any situation, without giving up, and it was the first time I was able to see both sides of life happening at the same exact time.

The reason…because here was a coach that rejected me (by cutting me from making the team) while at the same time accepted me (by making that comment).

And this in turn gave me the insight to see other situations in my life that had the same “hidden blessings.”

So therefore…

This became the major turning point in my life.

And the same is true for you.

It’s just a matter of what that is for you…and it’s there.

And since you and your life are that important, it’s worth taking the time to look through your life…even beyond the obvious…and look for the turning point in your life.

Now when you find it and move forward with your life something else happens as a result of you finding that turning point.

2. The snowball syndrome

After you find the turning point in your  life…then what?

To start, you can look at it as “breaking the ice” which leads to what I’m calling the snowball syndrome.

What this means is that situations you come across moving forward in your  life…that ordinarily would have left you feeling uncertain of what to do …uncertain of taking the “healthy risks”…and uncertain of what your  future holds…

Now all of a sudden are fueled by whatever the turning point was in your life.

In my case, having that coach say what he did…even though it had to do with going out for the baseball team…it “broke the ice” for me in a lifetime of ways so to speak.

It gave me the courage to be more  outgoing in different situations…ranging from social situations to doing what I love  today…and without having the fear and uncertainty that was there previously.

And this created a snowball effect because I knew that even if things didn’t go my way, that I had the courage to realize something “good” would come out of a situation that on the surface didn’t seem so good.

Let’s now take a look  at you.

After you find the turning moment in your life, what happened to you moving forward that you can now see is no longer a “block” for you?

What is it that you’ve “broken the ice” on that was a result of the turning point in your life?

Stay in the habit of doing this because this is one of the ways you build momentum in your life.

And then it’s a matter of you figuring out how there is carryover from one area of life to another.

Now I can’t give you the exact answer to that.

However…

I can make you aware to be mindful enough so you’ll recognize the clues you’re given along the way where you can make that connection.

Also…

While you’re building this momentum you’ll be creating what I’ll call “journey equity” into your life.

And this is what leads to you living a more  fulfilled and meaningful life.

3. Your epic journey

Realizing what the turning point of your life is and the momentum you get from it obviously is part of your life’s journey…

And not just the typical life journey.

But rather…your epic journey.

Why epic?

Because…for starters your life’s journey never ends.

Even after you pass on, your life’s journey can live on in the form of your legacy…which can be carried out by your family, a business if you own one, or in some other manner where you’re remembered for who you are and all that you’ve done.

And this is all initially created by discovering what the turning point in your life is.

As a result…

You’re able to change history moving forward on your life’s journey.

Remember…

Everything you say…your actions…how you react to someone else and situations are all creating new experiences.

And these experiences are changing history along the way.

This is one of the reasons why you do matter so much…because you’re always making a difference in the world in some way.

This is especially magnified once you realize what the turning point in your life is…and how it propels you on to achieving bigger and greater things in your life.

You can look at it as a crossroads moment in your life that spurs on other little crossroad moments afterwards.

And whether it’s a result of a baseball coach making a life changing comment like in my case…

Or it’s something as it relates to your situation…it doesn’t matter.

What matters is that it means something to you and in a way that makes a difference in your life…

And in a way that brings out the magnificence and brilliance of who you are.

Remember…

You’re here for a reason…and only you know that reason.

And it doesn’t matter what anyone else says or believes…it’s what you believe about who you are.

It comes down to this…

Stay true to yourself…know that you contribute a tremendous amount of value to the world…and that you do so in your own unique way which serves humanity.

And above all…

Thank yourself and those along the way that have contributed to you being the special person you are.

It kept happening over and over again and at first it made no sense at all.

But once the harsh reality started to set in, the question of “why” kept coming up.

Perhaps you’ve had the same thing happen to you.

Each and every day you see other people succeeding…increasing their wealth year after year, having more time to do what they love most, living a freedom based lifestyle—while you’re still working at your same job, living in the same house, having the same bills you can’t pay keep coming in…and telling yourself that, “next year will be different…things will get better.”

But it’s not getting better.

And the most frustrating part is why.

Because after all, you see everyone claiming how quick, fast, and easy it is to live what they call “the life of your dreams.”

And while you see them apparently living that way, you feel like giving up.

But there’s two things you aren’t seeing that is going on…

First, they didn’t achieve all of their success in a quick, fast, and easy way. And second, the reason for all of their success had mostly everything to do with having incredible willpower.

Now if you’re looking to change your current situation around and go from where you are now to where you want to be, the question to ask yourself is…

“How much willpower do you have?”

1. The easy rider

I’m sure you’ve seen this before in some way or another…”How to build your business fast”, “Here’s an easy way to go from zero to 6 figures in one year”, “Manifest what you want with ease.” It’s quick, it’s fast, it’s easy. And the list goes on and on.

If you’ve been in a situation where you bought a product, joined a coaching program, or even heard someone claim how “easy” it would be…

Let me ask you…

Did you get the results “quick”, “fast”…and was it “easy?”

Perhaps to some degree you did—or it may have seemed that way at first—but once you started applying it into your life, it was anything but “easy”…right?

And once you saw that it was more difficult than it was made out to be, what did you do?

Did you stay with it and persevere…or did you give up?

As strange as it may sound the so called “easy” solutions that are out there actually end up being more difficult…

And even stranger than this is that it’s no more difficult than it is easy.

Huh?

Ok, so what does this have to do with how much willpower you have?

Simply put…

When you look for things to be more easy you’ll end up having less willpower because when the difficult part comes up you’ll be more likely to give up.

Versus…

When you look for an equal balance of ease and difficulty you’ll end up having more willpower which results in you being more likely to be more persistent and perseverant.

But wait there’s also something else.

2. Giving up giving down

Now of course I’m not telling you to go out and just look for everything to be difficult. I’m also not telling you to go out and be negative and pessimistic. What I am telling you is that no matter what you do, that they’ll be both ease and difficulty along the way…

And this is a good thing. Because it is through the difficult challenging moments that you get your greatest breakthroughs…

But only on one condition…well maybe two:

That you don’t give up AND that whatever it is that you’re doing is highest on your values.

In other words, when you’re doing something you love that is most important to you, you won’t give up, you’ll have more willpower. This is the difference between giving up and giving down.

When you give up, you’ll quit and say, “It’s not meant to be” or “I’m not lucky.”

But when you give down, you’ll go deep down within and say, “I’m staying with it no matter what”, “I’ll take on both the positive and negative in pursuit of my purpose”..
.
And in the process you’ll be more inspired.

And this is when you get that breakthrough. This is when you realize that the positives and negatives in your life serve a purpose and are there to guide you.

It’s also when you discover (and rediscover) your genius and magnificence.

3. A force of one

I’ve said many times that everything that shows up in the world consists of what you see and don’t see. And most of what you do see is caused by what you don’t see.

Now to some people this may seem “phoo phoo’ish” or “really out there” but it’s not.

And the proof of this goes back to what I said earlier…

And that is, anyone you see as having a tremendous amount of success while increasing their financial wealth year after year…while living what seems like a dream life, not only put in a tremendous amount of time and effort to get there…

But they also had incredible willpower.

They went through the “ups” and “downs”, the increasing amount of support and challenge, people liking and disliking them, having happy moments and sad moments.

Now it may not appear this way to most people on the surface because most of the time you’ll only see the so called “positive” side…

But the reality is that behind closed doors, that which you didn’t see—the challenge, the people disliking them, the sad moments—was taking place AND was necessary AND was testing them to see how much willpower it would take for the success that you do see.

Because in order for you to have unstoppable willpower, it is incredibly important that you not only read what I say here but to apply it into your life.

Yes, we all want things to be easy, quick, and fast. That stands to reason.

Now I want you to think about this…

“The word easy would lose its meaning if not balanced by difficulty.”

And this…

“The word fast would lose its meaning if not balanced by slow.”

Now does this mean that getting the results you want should be a slow process to the point where it takes forever to achieve?

Of course not.

But just understand that sometimes by doing things “slowly” you get “faster” results.

Do you remember the old story about the tortoise and the hare?

It’s a story about how the fast moving hare (rabbit) ridiculed the slow moving tortoise.

The tortoise challenges the hare to a race. The hare starts off fast and leaves the tortoise in the dust while appearing to having an easy time winning the race.

But what happens along the way is that the hare was so overly confident he decided to take a nap during the race.

And by the time he awakes and races to the finish line he found out that the tortoise had passed him by and beat him.

Well, the tortoise in a sense had more willpower and was perseverant in the process even though he appeared to be slower than the hare.

So what seems like “slow” or a slow moving process on the outside, in many cases, is actually the fastest and quickest way.

That’s the point here…

Along with the fact that when you’re fulfillment driven and prepared for the ease and difficulty, you find out that achieving what you want does turn out to be easier than you originally thought. But only if you’re prepared and know how to handle both sides of the situation when they come up.

And this is the secret to having unstoppable willpower…

Along with realizing the tremendous amount of value you contribute to the world through the magnificence and uniqueness of who you are.

At times it can involve forbidden taboos.

To others it’s no big deal  at any time.

And then you have the people who see it both ways depending on the situation.

Now let’s consider what happens when you bring something that magnifies it all…such as a TV.

Well not just any ordinary TV.

Picture this…

If your life were broadcasted on 24 hour TV and the world got to see everything you do…would you care? Would you have a problem with that?

In other words…

If the entire world had the opportunity to see you live your life 24 hours a day…would you be able to love the things about yourself that you would ordinarily want no one else to know…those things you usually do all you can to keep private?

Have you ever thought about this in some way?

Whether you have or haven’t, to some degree  you reveal parts of your private self to others in your public life.

So the question is…

How often are you taking your privates public?

1. The Adjusted American

There’s an interesting book I just read called the Adjusted American. It was written back in 1964 and is about the normal neuroses in individuals and society.

Early on in the book it talks about how most people are VERY much concerned with what others think of them…and how this is not a healthy habit. It also goes on to talk about how humans have the need to be recognized.

While the book title may reference Americans, what they talk about applies to humans throughout the world…

And this ties right in with the idea of you being on 24 hour world TV.

Think about it…

How many times have you been in a situation…maybe you were at the store…at work …in a crowded area…or perhaps you were about to stand up in front of a room full of people to give a speech…

And you had thoughts like…

“What if they notice I’m overweight ?”

“What if they notice my skin  is sagging?”

“What if they think I talk funny?”

“What if they _____________?”

Whatever it was in your situation it still left you feeling very concerned about what others think.

Now here’s the fascinating part of this…

Most people…even those who you’re worried about what they think of you…most of the time are so busy with what others think about them…that they’re actually not thinking about you at all.

Yes, there may be some here and there who don’t fit this mold.

Yet…

The overwhelming majority of people are so concerned about what’s going on in their lives that they’re not even remotely thinking about how you look, sound, or come off.

And even those that do…they forget about it and get back  on with their own lives.

Why am I bringing this up?

Because the next time you have false evidence appearing real…FEAR…remember what I just said a moment ago.

As a result…

You would have taken the first step to taking your privates public…

Which leads to the next part.

2. Human beings only

After having consulted and coached hundreds of clients that have come through my Breakthrough to Achieve program I still get a shocking response whenever this is brought up…

“Anything anyone says about you is true. However, it may not be in the same exact form…but it’s still true.”

Most people have a tough time realizing this at first.

Why?

Because we as humans have been taught to adopt certain traits…usually the positive ones…while disowning the so called “negative” ones.

And this results  in a one sided, pseudo, fantasy persona of who you are. In other words it’s not being authentic.

Remember…

All humans have every human trait… to include those that are the most sacred and most profane. If a trait…negative or positive…didn’t serve a purpose it wouldn’t exist.

And the reason I’m bringing this up goes back to what I said about being on 24 hour TV…along with worrying about what others think about you.

It comes down to this…

When you know with certainty that you have every trait…the so called “positive” and “negative” ones…you won’t worry about what other people say or might even be thinking regarding you…because it’s true anyway.

It’s just a matter of seeing how it serves your life.

And when you do…

You’ll be able to love and appreciate yourself.

It’s interesting…

How many times have you heard someone…especially the personal development and self help gurus speak about being able to “love yourself”…yet you never hear them bring in the so called “negative” parts of themselves along with the positive?”

Because the only way you’re able to love yourself is to be thankful and appreciate all the parts of who you are.

Now what you’ll see most people talk about here is the idea of acceptance…and accepting yourself (and others) for who you (and they) are.

This is not about acceptance.

You’re not here to “accept” yourself or others…because this implies something is still out of order.

“Acceptance is an illusion that I’ve convinced myself that something is right or good. It’s a one way self righteous judgment and is often a resistance to loving someone or something.”

Remember…

You are here to love…yourself and others.

And the way you do is by seeing both sides…not accepting one or the other.

3. Tuning in or out

Obviously when it comes to taking your privates public there is a limit so to speak.

What I mean is…you don’t want to go around announcing to the world everything about yourself, your family, and those you care about…

Because after all there is a trust factor involved…especially when dealing with other people.

Plus…

The idea of going around and telling everyone about yourself…even if it doesn’t bother you in revealing everything about yourself is not the wisest way to be humble and present.

What’s important here is that you’re aware and prepared for moments that come up in your life…that at first may have you feeling uneasy…and then being able to not let them (or others) bother you in what they said or think about you.

Because when you’re not worried about what others think…you’ll be focused and present.

Which in turn allows you to bring out your inner brilliance…and to shine.

It allows you to tune in and be present while tuning out the distractions.

It allows you to be in control of your life versus having others control your life.

And it allows you to get in touch with the magnificence of who you are…what you’re made of…and what you’re here to be, do, and have.

I’ve said this many times…

You never have to get rid of who you are to appreciate and love yourself.

And…

You never have to get rid of any of yourself to be appreciated and loved for who you are.
.
It’s a matter of embracing and seeing yourself in a way that brings tremendous amounts of value to the world through the uniqueness of who you are.