Today as we celebrate Thanksgiving here in the United States we will practice gratitude for all of our blessings and all the aspects of our life that are working for us. We are really good at being grateful for all that appears to be going right in our world. And why not? It’s easy to do this because it instantly makes us feel good and who doesn’t want to feel good?

What happens though when no matter where we look all we see is obstacles in our life? How do we reach for gratitude?How do we choose being grateful when all we are really feeling is betrayed, angry, lonely, or defeated? How do we say “thank you” when it feels like our entire world has been turned upside down?  How can we be grateful when it appears as if nothing is going the way we had hoped it would go? How do we give thanks when we feel like giving up and what we truly desire feels completely out of reach?

Just like being grateful for only the good stuff is easy, making excuses for our challenges or simply denying that they exist also feels easy. It checks us out and puts us on the sidelines of life.

It is natural to resist looking into these corners of our life long enough to even notice that we are indeed holding onto pains, disappointments and circumstances that are not serving us.  Instead we would rather just focus on the “good” without ever having the willingness to confront what we are really feeling. The truth is the more we deny it, the more it will fester and expand.

But what’s also true is that when we can find gratitude for these challenges we open ourselves up to receiving miraculous gifts beyond what the mind could conceive.

Real transformative gratitude doesn’t allow us to pick and choose what’s good and bad and right and wrong. It is about being able to say thank you for every thing that comes our way. 
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As the saying goes, “Life doesn’t always give us what we want, but it will always give us what we need.” It gives us exactly what we may need in order for us to step up and out into the most expansive version of our truth. How could we ever really know what we are made of if we stayed in blame and victimhood? How could we ever know our strength, courage, and resilience? How could we ever tap into our true Spirit if life was one straight road filled with sunshine and rainbows?

It is during the challenging times that we are being given the opportunity to discover who we are. It’s easy to be grateful for our blessings, but the real question is, can we find gratitude when…..

its time for the relationship to end? Can we be thankful for all the lessons that we learned?

we are faced with an illness? Can we be grateful for the gifts being offered through the illness?

we lose the job? Can we say thank you for an opening to an even better opportunity.

our  job leaves us feeling unfulfilled? Can we be thankful for the opportunity to discover what truly lights us up?

those closest to us don’t agree with our truth? Can we thank them for giving us the courage and stamina we gained for staying true to ourselves?

we feel depressed and alone? Can we see this as a doorway to loving ourselves more than we ever knew we could?

we feel unworthy and unappreciated? Can we see this as an opportunity to truly value and appreciate ourselves? 

we feel lost and confused? Can we see this as a chance to gain more clarity and feel on purpose and connected to life?

What if true gratitude meant saying, “Thank you God, Life, Universe for every obstacle, challenge, pain, disappointment and struggle I am experiencing so that I may come face to face with the truth of who I really am, so that I may be introduced to the highest version of myself and so that I may know what it is really like to live this life full out. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to see that I do indeed have choice and that I can choose to see how my circumstances are serving and assisting me. Thank you for allowing me to see that it is only my fear that keeps me challenged and that at any given moment when I am ready and willing, I have the freedom to stand in my power despite what I am experiencing.”

This form of gratitude is about using this powerful practice as a way to guide us away from victimhood and towards our destiny. When all appears to be going wrong, all is really going exactly as it should. What we often don’t realize is that we are being called to have the courage to face ourselves fully with deep gratitude, love and compassion. We are being called to get honest with ourselves, shift our perceptions and our thinking, feel into our real emotions and allow ourselves to open up to our highest potential.

How can this form of gratitude guide you to perceive yourself differently? How would you see your challenges as a benefit to your growth and evolution?  What would you need to embrace within yourself that you have been denying? Who would you become in spite of how life is showing up for you?

These are all answers that are already sitting inside of each and every one of us and it is up to us to allow the answers to emerge. As Caroline Myss states, “Passivity leaves us to the hands of fate. Participation creates our destiny.”  If we pay close attention we will see that we are continuously being asked to fully participate in our lives. Your destiny is counting on you.