“You’ve Got to be willing to lose everything to gain yourself” – Iyanla Vanzant

Recently, I had a conversation with a colleague where we discussed the topic of emotional freedom and the importance of feeling safe enough to freely express our emotions as they arise within us. This is something that I deeply believe should be taught from an early age, but often it’s not. Instead we are given the message that we are too sensitive, we should toughen up, or that we’ll simply get over it. My colleague describes this as the “Have a lollipop” syndrome. Basically when life hands us something challenging or painful, we are taught to put a bandaid over the experience and mask the feeling rather than actually feel what is happening and give ourselves the love and nourishment that we are needing in that moment. The problem with this is a “lollipop” may appear innocent at first sight, but our power never lies in what we can give to ourselves externally. Our real power resides within. And when we deny and avoid what is happening within us, we create some powerful internal chaos. And without conscious awareness, that innocent lollipop is the beginning of the need for more and more external security in order to fill the internal void that we are experiencing. We begin to strive for more and more “lollipops” to sooth the discomfort and before we know it we are caught in the illusion of believing we need more money, things, relationships etc. and we lose all sense of power in the only place that truly matters – within us.

The Universe is brilliant though and is always seeking out the best for us in that it will do anything it needs to in order for us to connect to our authentic power. It will often go so far as to strip away all the illusions of life so that we may clearly see the truth of who we really are.  Often it takes losing all that appears essential to our Ego’s survival.  It may strip our relationships, health, wealth, job or all of the above to wake us up. The following are 10 reasons why losing it all can be the greatest gift that we can receive.

1. It may give us the awareness that we have choice to stop the obsessive search outward for worthiness and approval and offer us a new opportunity to focus inward and uncover our authentic power.

2. It may cause us to identify and eliminate the limiting thought patterns that have been keeping us stuck in fear and repeating unwanted patterns.

3. It may give us the opportunity to let go of the Ego’s needs and truly open up to and welcome in our heart’s desires.

4. It may open the doorway to realizing our power is not in what we have, but rather in who we choose to be.

5. It may be the catalyst to practicing acceptance and taking a deeper look at what life is trying to so graciously teach us.

6. It may re-connecst us with our own truth rather than what we were conditioned to think and believe is best for us.

7. It may offer us the real and very powerful experience of taking a leap of faith and trusting that we may fall exactly where we need to.

8. It may lead us to the creation of an authentic, powerful vision for ourselves – one that is in alignment with our heart and soul.

9. It may open a doorway to uncovering qualities and gifts within us that we have been blind to and using them in a way that moves us towards our highest potential.

10. It may lead us to surrendering to our own plans and welcoming in a much grander plan that the universe has in store for us.

Be open and accepting to all that occurs.  Be grateful for the losses. Be willing to see and experience the miracle in everything. As Albert Einstein said, “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as if nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.”