A Reason to Smile

A Reason to Smile


Q&A: ‘I love him, but he doesn’t want a relationship’

posted by B. Dave Walters

Sometimes, no means no.

Question submitted via Facebook:

“Mr. Walters, I hope you can help me: There is this guy whom I really like. I told him about my feelings but he says that he doesn’t want to get into any relationship right now. I have been using the law of attraction but not so well; sometimes I feel that he may be the one for me and I must wait. But sometimes I feel that I’m too attached to him and this is not too good for me, and i must forget him. What do I do?”

If he doesn’t want a relationship, then he doesn’t want a relationship!

The question, then, is: are you willing to accept what he’s giving you now, or not? Does he still want the sex without the attachment, or is he not open to any sort of romantic connection?

Using the Law of Attraction is all well and good, but remember it can not override another person’s free will; you can not MAKE him do anything, you can only create the space to make him want to choose you.

The best advice, is to move on and look for a new guy. There are plenty of other men out there who would LOVE to be with someone like you; there is no reason to keep chasing someone who isn’t going to give you what you want.

If you insist on chasing this guy, then the first thing is: Learn how men think. For the most part, men don’t want to be chased; make him chase *you *. The best way to do this is to start dating new guys, and let him know you are doing it; once he knows you aren’t sitting by the phone waiting for him, he’ll automatically start paying you more attention.

Also, if you know there are certain T.V. Shows or sports he likes, start watching them and mentioning them to him. If his favorite fighter gets interviewed online, email him a link. If he looks good one day, tell him; but mention it in passing like it’s no big deal.

DO NOT bring up how you feel about him again, unless *he * brings it up to *you *; you don’t want to make him feel guilty, that is just going to make him start avoiding you.

So, to be clear: move on, he isn’t worth chasing.

And if you insist on chasing him, then take the time to turn yourself into his Mrs. Right and let him come to you.

Keep us posted on how it turns out.

What do you think she should do? Feel free to comment down below!

You are great, and I love you!
And if you love me back, click ‘share’ up at the top!

B. Dave Walters Writer, Life Coach, and Talk Radio Host

Find out more about me: http://about.me/BDaveWalters

Ask me anything: http://formspring.me/BDaveWalters

Pages I support:
Jesus and Buddha – Interfaith dialog

Gnostic Theism – Religion and Spirituality for the 21st Century (Join the Movement!)

Love One Another – A group for the coolest Spiritual people on the Internet!

 

 



  • BCollins

    I’m dealing with somewhat the same thing. The guy and I have been friends for a few years and he acts as if he likes me. He even tells me he loves me. So, I decided to take the plunge and bring up how I feel about him (which he already pretty much already knew) and well, it ended up being a huge mistake! His words to me were that he loves me too much to have me hate him later on if things don’t work and that that is why he would/will never have a relationship with me. I know him saying he loves me isn’t about sex since we’ve never been intimate. So what gives? Could he really be so afraid of losing me that he would rather keep me in the friend zone than give us a chance? I really don’t get it!!

Previous Posts

The Spiritual Lessons of Superheroes
As of the time of this writing, San Diego Comic Con is starting up.  I'll be appearing on a panel on Spiritual Themes in Comics on Saturday at 6 PM in room 4...stop by and see me if you're in town!

posted 5:58:23am Jul. 24, 2014 | read full post »

Expectations and the Law of Attraction
“There were two ways to be happy: improve your reality, or lower your expectations” ― Jodi Picoult Question submitted via Formspring: “How can I use the Law of Attraction to remove nega

posted 2:54:31am Jun. 30, 2014 | read full post »

How to Avoid Disappointment and Feel at Peace
“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but thought about it. Be aware of the thoughts you are thinking. Separate them from the situation, which is always neutral. It is as it is.” -Eckhart To

posted 10:43:30pm May. 31, 2014 | read full post »

A Message from Your Future Self
"The biggest human temptation is to settle for too little." -Thomas Merton Beloved, Once again, it has been ages since we last talked.  Too long. Of course, I have been here watching, and I see

posted 1:29:58am Apr. 28, 2014 | read full post »

Q&A: I love him, but I’m afraid all he wants is sex
Question submitted via Formspring: “Mr. Walters, I've been seeing this guy for about two and half months now. We spend lots of time together, sometimes he’ll call me just to chat and to see

posted 7:21:18pm Mar. 30, 2014 | read full post »




Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.