A Reason to Smile

A Reason to Smile

Q&A: ‘Is being negative just as good as being positive?’

Which way will you go?

Question submitted via Formspring:
“One of my friends actually believes being negative is as ok as being positive. He is constantly desolate and sad due to victimizing himself and not trusting anyone. Am I not able to convince him because I am not positive enough?”

A couple of things: First, it isn’t up to you to convince your friend of anything; all you have to do is be there for him when he needs you.  Of course, how positive you are may have an impact on him, but we’ll come back to that in a minute.


The other thing is, he doesn’t really think that being negative is just as good as being positive; but his life experience has caused him to believe negativity is the safer bet.  Since if you always assume the worst, you can never be disappointed, right?

Unfortunately, that is not the case, since not only does assuming the worst not make the worst any easier to deal with when it arrives, it robs the present of its joy. And of course, the Law of Attraction teaches us that the more negative emotion we put out into the Universe, the more negativity we’ll attract back to us.


Chances are extremely high that there is some unresolved baggage, issues, and trauma from his past that you may or may not know about that is holding him down.  And as long as there are things that he has not forgiven himself or someone else for, it will be difficult for him to be truly happy, since you have to learn how to forgive before you can learn how to trust.

Which brings us back to what you can do for him, and that is this: Be a good example.  It doesn’t matter whether or not you are ‘positive enough’, since it’s not a competition; it only matters that you are consistent.   It also doesn’t matter how many times you watch The Secret or post positive quotes, if you get angry or disappointed when things don’t go your way, because he sees it.  If you get all excited about manifesting a new Ferrari one moment, and give up after a week, he sees that, too.


But above all else, remember there is nothing wrong with him; he’s doing the best he can, just like everyone else.  He has to do some inner work and start making different choices to get different results, which is something you cannot do for him.  Focus on being the best friend that you can, and building the best life that you can and everything else will fall into place.

P.S.: My holiday promotion has been extended through the end of the year; you can get access to my book, audio programs, PDFs, and coaching service easier than ever before.  Visit my website to learn more!


You are great, and I love you!
And if you love me back, click ‘share’ up at the top!

B. Dave Walters Writer, Life Coach, and Talk Radio Host

Find out more about me:

Ask me anything:

Pages I support:
Jesus and Buddha — Interfaith dialog

Gnostic Theism — Religion and Spirituality for the 21st Century (Join the Movement!)

Love One Another — A group for the coolest Spiritual people on the Internet!



Previous Posts

Thankfulness During Difficult Times (Video)
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving here in the U.S., but I want to take some time out from cooking turkey to have a quick talk about what you're ...

posted 2:03:12am Nov. 26, 2015 | read full post »

Making use of the last Super Moon of 2015
October 27 will mark the last of three consecutive ‘Super Moon’ full moons of 2015. This month has already been a very high-energy time, which may have resulted in thin skins, and more than a few sleepless nights.  [caption ...

posted 1:52:51am Oct. 25, 2015 | read full post »

Making use of the September supermoon eclipse
This Sunday night at 10:11 PM EST / 2:11 AM GMT there will be quite a sight visible in the night sky:  The largest full, or ‘supermoon’ of the year, combined with a total lunar eclipse.  Full moons are always powerful and supermoons are ...

posted 9:07:10pm Sep. 27, 2015 | read full post »

Making use of the August 2015 supermoon
Starting on Saturday, August 29th we’ll be experiencing one of the six major ‘supermoons’ of the year, a time when the moon is especially close to the Earth and the full moon effects are particularly strong. This month’s supermoon ...

posted 4:19:30am Aug. 29, 2015 | read full post »

Q&A - "I don't want to share my life with him anymore....
Question submitted via “I have split recently with my partner of 12 years. He demands to know what goes on in my life and who ...

posted 4:46:58am Aug. 18, 2015 | read full post »


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.