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A Reason to Smile

A Reason to Smile

Q&A: We just broke up and he’s already moved on; what should I do?

Sometimes there's no going back....

(Unedited) question submitted via Formspring:
“My BF and I just recently separated. Recently a friend stated she had to tell me something my BF told her husband. My heart dropped to the floor and ask if he’s in another relationship already. Does this mean I still Love him and have feelings for him?”

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It’s not too clear if you friend told you he’s seeing someone, or you were just *worried * your friend would say he was seeing someone?
Either way, it’s totally normal to be upset to see an ex move on, especially if you didn’t necessarily want it to end.

However, based on the fact that you are asking if this means you still have feelings for him, it may be that you were ready for the relationship to be over when it ended, anyway; whether it was his doing, yours, or mutual.
Chances are, yes you still have feelings for him; that sort of thing doesn’t go away over night no matter why you break up.

It seems like the question you are asking is, ‘does this mean that we should get back together’, and the answer is probably not.

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Since, it seems like you were getting along fine without him until you found out he was getting along fine without *you *, which means it’s probably your ego that is hurting more than your heart.

If you think breaking up might have been a mistake after all, search your heart long and hard before you reach out to him again. Since there is no point in opening an old wound if you are going to want to break up again in a week, or a month; and there is always the possibility that he is not going to want to look back to an old relationship if he really has moved on to a new one.

Better to focus on falling in love with yourself, and clarifying what it is that you want from a relationship, so you’ll be better prepared when the next one arrives!

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B. Dave Walters

Writer, Life Coach, and Talk Radio Host

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