Advertisement

A Reason to Smile

A Reason to Smile

Q&A: “I stay because I’m afraid of being alone, but what can I do?”

There are worse things than being alone....

Question submitted via Formspring
“I stay with him because I’m afraid of being alone, but what can I do?”

I have gone on record many time before saying that it is better to be alone, then to be with the wrong person.

Advertisement

In my coaching work I hear all kinds of excuses for staying in relationships that aren’t working anymore. If your reason for staying together is anything other than “because we love each other more than anything else”, it’s a bad reason. Unfortunately, there are still situations where even that isn’t enough.

Let me reiterate: IT IS BETTER TO BE ALONE THAN TO BE WITH THE WRONG PERSON.

There are a few reasons why this is the case.
First is, it sends the wrong message to the Universe. Clinging to a relationship that you know isn’t working is telling the Universe that you don’t don’t deserve anything better.
If you have the courage to step out on your own, then you at least create the possibility of BOTH of you finding someone who can help you feel happy and fulfilled.

Advertisement

The second reason is, it’s giving into fear. The fear of being alone is one of the most common ones out there; the question is: what are you afraid of?
Many people stay in toxic, hostile, and even dangerous relationships with emotionally, verbally, or even physically abusive relationships because they believe they can’t do any better.
To which I reply: unfulfilling relationships aren’t hard to come by; finding someone else to be mean to you won’t be too hard to do!

The real issue is even deeper, and that’s the old fear that “I’m not good enough”. That fear that deep down inside, a person doesn’t really feel like they are worth loving, or that they deserve to be happy. So, they manifest relationships that demonstrate this, possibly even with mates that TELL them no one else will love them if they leave.

Advertisement

The real truth is this: if someone is abusing you, they don’t love you.
Mental, emotional, or verbal abuse are ALL abuse, and should never be tolerated ever.
If the relationship has just gone stale, then you need to learn how to work together to improve it or start the process of letting go.
Remember, as always: if you can’t communicate, then you don’t have a relationship!

How to get over bad relationships, how to create good ones, and how to deal with fear are such common questions that I did three entire programs on just that:

Advertisement

What you have to do is, love yourself first. No one who truly loves themselves is ever afraid of being alone, since you know your value and enjoy your own company!

And it doesn’t matter who you are, what you look like, how much you weigh or what you do for a living, someone out there is looking for someone just like you at this very second.

Clinging to your old sinking ship of a relationship is just keeping them waiting for nothing.
The only thing worse than being alone is being alone with someone else under the same roof

What do you think they should do? Feel free to comment down below!

Advertisement

You are great, and I love you!
And if you love me back, click subscribe over on the right hand side!

B. Dave Walters
Writer, Life Coach, and Talk Radio Host

Find out more about me:
http://about.me/BDaveWalters

Ask me anything:
http://formspring.me/BDaveWalters

Previous Posts

Exclusive interview with Radhika Vekaria of Temperheart
Radhika Vekaria is one half of the singer/songwriter duo TemperHeart. Ms. Vekaria left behind a successful career in England in order to move to Los Angeles and pursue her lifelong dream of being a professional singer.  In this exclusive ...

posted 10:29:10pm Feb. 07, 2016 | read full post »

Q&A: I’m struggling with online dating; help!
Question submitted via About.me/BDaveWalters: “Okay, your post said if I am struggling with online dating to message you. Here I am struggling with online dating! [caption id="attachment_1505" align="alignright" width="300"] It's time to ...

posted 6:14:12am Jan. 18, 2016 | read full post »

The Reason for the Season; Or, Would Jesus Celebrate Christmas?
On a recent episode of my radio show, Rise UP with B. Dave Walters we discussed the true meaning of Christmas, and how to deal with some of the negative emotions that can come along with it.  I got so emotional while talking about the meaning ...

posted 2:52:45am Dec. 23, 2015 | read full post »

Thankfulness During Difficult Times (Video)
Tomorrow is Thanksgiving here in the U.S., but I want to take some time out from cooking turkey to have a quick talk about what you're ...

posted 2:03:12am Nov. 26, 2015 | read full post »

Making use of the last Super Moon of 2015
October 27 will mark the last of three consecutive ‘Super Moon’ full moons of 2015. This month has already been a very high-energy time, which may have resulted in thin skins, and more than a few sleepless nights.  [caption ...

posted 1:52:51am Oct. 25, 2015 | read full post »

Advertisement


Report as Inappropriate

You are reporting this content because it violates the Terms of Service.

All reported content is logged for investigation.