Beliefnet
A Prescription for Healthy Living

” I found the one!” – ” You may now kiss the bride”,  You’ve been waiting for this moment that unite you with your soul mate forever. You want to live and experience this relationship feelings for the rest of your life, ‘ Till death do us apart”.

You never expect these feelings to fade away, and sometimes  you wonder “what happened?”, “How can we fix this?”. Here are some tips that can help you, so you can have a healthy relationship starting now.

Take Responsibility:

Don’t always blame your significant other. Sometimes it is you. Before you start any argument, you need to take a deep breath and think clearly. Pick your battle, may be you’re being so stubborn, while instead, you could both meet at the middle.

Get Engaged

Show your interest in  what matters to your partner. It makes a huge difference when you encourage, share your opinion, or even listen to your partner. Smile in a positive and emotional way is the way to a healthier relationship. Your significant other could be going through some tough time. Your smile could be a way to help.

Hold Hands

 Remember how you loved holding hands all the time?
If you’re glued to Facebook during dinner, then it’s time to unplug. A study published in Computers in Human Behavior looked at data from 1,160 married people and found a negative correlation between heavy social-media use and relationship happiness. “When angry, some people may turn to texting to avoid saying something,” Saltz says. “It’s a way of creating distance.” While it doesn’t hurt to send a flirty or loving message, it does pay off to be more direct with your partner when something is really eating at you.

Go to bed at the same time

Feel like you never have a free moment together? Hitting the sack at the same time will help. “Bedtime might be the only opportunity you’re alone together all day,” says Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D., author of The Happy Couple: How to Make Happiness a Habit One Little Loving Thing at a Time. Even if you’re a night owl, you can always stay in bed until your partner drifts off. You should also make sure you’re both getting a healthy amount of shut-eye. A study from the University of California, Berkeley, looked at the sleep habits of more than 100 couples. Those who reported poor sleep were much more likely to argue with their significant other the next day.

Brew a cup of coffee for your partner

Grand gestures aren’t the only way to express your love. Something as simple as brewing your partner a cup of coffee in the morning helps improve your relationship, says Terri Orbuch, Ph.D., a marriage researcher and author of 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage From Good to Great. Orbuch has studied 373 couples for more than 28 years through the University of Michigan’s Survey Research Center, and her research shows that frequent small acts of kindness are a predictor of happiness in a relationship. “People may feel taken for granted,” Orbuch says. By doing these small tasks on a regular basis, you’ll help your partner feel noticed.

Bring up a funny moment from your past

Sometimes the best memories are the funny ones. In a Motivation and Emotion study, couples that remembered laughing together — like the time a grocery-store clerk did something funny in the checkout line — reported greater relationship satisfaction than those who remembered experiences that were positive but not necessarily when they’d laughed. “Laughter reminiscence packs an additional punch because people relive the moment by laughing again,” says study author Doris Bazzini, Ph.D., a psychologist at Appalachian State University in Boone, N.C.

Work up a sweat

It’s no secret that getting buff helps you out in the bedroom by boosting your endurance, strength and flexibility — but a sweat session also has more immediate effects. “Endorphins from exercise give you an adrenaline rush that boosts arousal,” Orbuch says. Activities that get your heart rate up, like hiking, running or biking, are guaranteed to have a positive effect on desire. “Any kind of arousal rush can be transferred to your partner and add passion to your relationship,” Orbuch says.

Getting busy often enough to satisfy you both is key. If you’re feeling so-so about your bedroom romps, it might be time for a change. One idea: try having sex in a room or area you’ve never done it in. “New elements of play stimulate the dopamine system,” Saltz says. “When you do something that causes you to release more dopamine, it’s a positive reinforcer.” Want to suggest a tryst in the kitchen? Don’t worry about making it a drawn-out conversation, she says. It can be as simple as a one-liner that hints at your intention like, “The kids are gone. How about the kitchen table?” As long as your partner is game for the idea too, nothing’s stopping you.

Give your partner a hug

Nonsexual touching like hugging or handholding is just as important as sex itself in keeping your relationship healthy. “Touching is probably the most definitive way to let other people know you’re in a relationship,'” Goldsmith says. In the long run, the more you touch your mate, the more you’ll feel comfortable with each other. “Touching is a way we calm ourselves down,” Goldsmith says. “Every time you do it, you’re sending a positive message to your significant other.”

Ask a new question

As a couple, you probably spend most of your time chatting about work, your kids or your friends. When’s the last time you stopped to ask something new about each other? Everyone changes as relationships progress, Orbuch says, so it’s likely your partner has different interests and passions from the early years of your relationship. So ask your partner about anything you wouldn’t normally — movies, music, even what you’d do with lottery winnings.

Say thank you

Think about the last time your partner did something to help you out or made you feel special, and then say “thank you” for it. “You get so comfortable with your partner, it’s easy to expect them to meet your needs,” Saltz says. Too often couples forget to express a simple thanks, whether one of you helps out with the chores or surprises the other with a gift. And have you ever said thank you to your partner for simply being in your life? It’s important to express gratitude for this — not just for what they’re doing for you, Goldsmith says.

Celebrate 

Valentine, first kiss, and anniversaries. Set a reminder if you think you may forget. Celebrate every occasion that would matters to your partner.

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