Sherry Gaba LCSW, Psychotherapist, Life & Recovery Coach is featured Celebrity Rehab on VH1. Sherry is the author of The Law of Sobriety which uses the law of attraction to recover from any addiction. Please download your Free EBooks from Sherry™s Enrich Your Life Series. Contact Sherry at firstname.lastname@example.org for webinars, teleseminars, coaching packages and speaking engagements. Listen to Sherry on A Moment of Change with Sherry Gaba on CBS.
As a whole, people are their own worst enemies when it comes to changing their behaviors and thoughts. We constantly reinforce areas that we feel are weaknesses, going over and over these events as we try to sleep. We may also be constantly bombarded with other people’s negative thoughts about our behaviors and choices. For people with addictions, this constant stream of negativity from self and others can block all the possibilities of positive change.
I have addressed this issue in my book The Law Of Sobriety in talking about how addicts see themselves as always making bad choices and never accomplishing what they want. Because they are unable to see any positives, the only option is to see negatives. Even neutral thoughts or behaviors become negative since they obviously aren’t positive. Every time we try to break out of addictive behaviors, our minds tell us we are the addiction and we can’t change because we just don’t have it in us.
So, how can we change how we view ourselves to allow the change we crave and let go of all those negative images and thoughts? Believe it or not, all it takes is a few simple steps. To get you started try the following:
- Clearly articulate what you want in life and why it is important to you. This is not tangible items like a car or a house, rather it is what they represent. A feeling of freedom and accomplishment, a sense of security and connection with the world around you—whatever is your deepest desire.
- Write down one thing that happens every day that has taken you one step closer to your goals. This could include taking a class, applying for a new job, meeting a new person, taking up a new hobby, keeping a promise to a family member or friend or whatever else you do that is replacing something negative with something positive.
- Keep a record of positive comments made to you by friends, family members and even strangers. Reviewing these positives and reflecting back on what you did at the time can help replace those internal negative messages with ones that are much more accurate and true to the positive person you are.
Before long you will find that you attract more positive experiences and people and, once you see yourself in a sober, productive and positive light, real change will occur all on its own.