The Desperate Faithful
So I watched the first hour of 'Book of Daniel.' Sure seemed like a religion-tinged version of 'Desperate Housewives.'
Man, that show had everything. A wife whose reflex is to reach for a martini shaker. An Episcopal priest with a Vicodin crutch. A kid who deals weed (to pay for software that will help her art career!), another who's gay, a third who's bonking dad's best friend's daughter in the back of the family car (a Volvo, natch). Oh, and embezzlement. And an attempt to get the money back from the embezzler--the priest's brother-in-law--through the good offices of a Catholic priest who is, no fooling, Italian. But the embezzler had a heart attack in a hotel room--I'm fuzzy here, but I think he was with a prostitute when he expired--and it turns out he wasn't the embezzler at all. Revised theory: it's the priest's sister-in-law and the embezzler's secretary. A lesbo love plot? At that point, I zoned out.
Call me old-fashioned, but there are shows--'Law & Order' comes to mind--that find one story compelling enough to fill an hour. Shows like 'Book of Daniel' have ADD. They operate on the theory that if they move randomly and quickly enough, you'll be mesmerized.
Well, I was. Mostly by the loathsome plotting and writing. Like the moment when the Bishop (Ellen Burstyn, for the love of God!) reminds the priest who she is by reciting a bit of her resume. Way back when I taught screenwriting at NYU, I believe that was called "exposition"--and it was rewarded with a failing grade.
I did, however, like Jesus. He was warm and ironic--like Willem Dafoe, but in a good mood. I felt bad for him, having to deal with nimwits like this cast. But nothing seemed to faze Him. He's got compassion for all His children, it seems--even the writers I would condemn to hell.
Maybe He'll get a show of His own?
Man, that show had everything. A wife whose reflex is to reach for a martini shaker. An Episcopal priest with a Vicodin crutch. A kid who deals weed (to pay for software that will help her art career!), another who's gay, a third who's bonking dad's best friend's daughter in the back of the family car (a Volvo, natch). Oh, and embezzlement. And an attempt to get the money back from the embezzler--the priest's brother-in-law--through the good offices of a Catholic priest who is, no fooling, Italian. But the embezzler had a heart attack in a hotel room--I'm fuzzy here, but I think he was with a prostitute when he expired--and it turns out he wasn't the embezzler at all. Revised theory: it's the priest's sister-in-law and the embezzler's secretary. A lesbo love plot? At that point, I zoned out.
Call me old-fashioned, but there are shows--'Law & Order' comes to mind--that find one story compelling enough to fill an hour. Shows like 'Book of Daniel' have ADD. They operate on the theory that if they move randomly and quickly enough, you'll be mesmerized.
Well, I was. Mostly by the loathsome plotting and writing. Like the moment when the Bishop (Ellen Burstyn, for the love of God!) reminds the priest who she is by reciting a bit of her resume. Way back when I taught screenwriting at NYU, I believe that was called "exposition"--and it was rewarded with a failing grade.
I did, however, like Jesus. He was warm and ironic--like Willem Dafoe, but in a good mood. I felt bad for him, having to deal with nimwits like this cast. But nothing seemed to faze Him. He's got compassion for all His children, it seems--even the writers I would condemn to hell.
Maybe He'll get a show of His own?




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