Please help me to not kill my boyfriend.
When he leaves the toilet seat up,
keep my voice from becoming shrill.
When he responds to my conversation in cave man speak,
keep my hand from hitting the back of his head.
When he smells like a locker room,
keep my requests for hygiene civil.
When he gives me a gift that's really for him,
keep my smile from faltering.
When he rolls his eyes at my mother,
keep me from plucking them from his face.
When he infuriates me, please remind me,
I love that big lug.
And jail isn't fun.
Women of All Faiths
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