6 Ways To Be A Good School Parent By Christine Agro

Here we are, headed back to school. Whether this is your first time sending your child off to school or you are a seasoned veteran, the school environment is truly a whole other world. As parents we have to find balance between being our child’s advocate and letting them navigate their own journey. In the school setting we not only have to figure out how to best support our child, but we now have the added factor of entrusting our child’s education and daily well-being to someone else.

It can be difficult to let go of the reigns and turn them over to someone else who will play an important role shaping and molding who your child becomes. I always remind myself that Caidin’s school experience is his. School is not just about learning fundamentals, it Is also about learning how to interact, collaborate, find ones voice and assess situations.

School offers Caidin opportunity after opportunity to test out different reactions and responses, decide who he wants to be and how he wants to show up in the world and of course to learn.

Children have a full plate while at school navigating relationship, interactions and education. Teachers have an equally challenging job with many constituents – from administrators to parents to the kids themselves – that they need to consider.

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Addressing Issues

Your child comes home from school upset with a story about his teacher, or another kid. Before you charge in like a mama bear, do the 1,2, 3, 4 check.

1. Find out more about what happened. Ask questions that help your child give you more details.

2. Reiterate back to your child how you understand the situation at hand and make sure what you think you heard, is what your child actually expressed.

3. Ask your child what he would like you do or what he would like to have happen. Sometimes, just like adults, kids just want to vent, but they aren’t expecting us to charge in and resolve the problem. Giving them space (there that is again) to see if they can address the issue themselves will give them a greater sense of confidence. Before you intercede, see if you can offer them guidance, tools and tips. Maybe do some role playing – whether it’s dealing with a friend or speaking to their teacher, to help them find the words and confidence to fight their own battles.

4. Assess the situation. Sometimes we do need to step in, but if you do, try to do it from a neutral place. Approach your child’s teacher from a place of ‘I want to find out more about what’s going on here.’ Or ‘this is really troubling, can you explain to me what happened.’ After having the conversation, let your child know what happened and what actions will be taken and let your child know that you are there to support him as this gets worked out. Then monitor the situation.