All in the Hindu-Zoroastrian Family

We have a table, a small, round mahogany piece that my husband and I picked up at the 23rd Street flea market in New York City during the first year of our marriage. Most of the time, it sits at the entrance of our house, sporting a silver cigar box that belonged to my grandfather and a framed eight-by-ten photo of my husband and me, smiling at our wedding reception. But that little table has also come to signify the spiritual nexus of our bi-cultural family, a surface upon which we can celebrate our respective faiths even as we create a unique one for our family.

I am a Hindu Brahmin and my husband is an Iranian Zoroastrian. We are not a particularly religious couple, neither of us practices rituals. When we got married, we didn't think that religion or religious identity was important.

And then one day in a New York hospital, a midwife presented us with a six-pound baby boy, who in turn was presented with a host of golden "Om" pendants and "Farohars" (a Zoroastrian symbol) in all shapes and sizes.

While my parents thanked the panoply of Hindu Gods for our son, my Zoroastrian in-laws rejoiced at having another potential member to add to their clan.

Suddenly, my husband and I were at a loss. Everyone was asking us how we were going to raise our son and we had no clue. Sure, we had our love, and we would give plenty of it to our son. But beyond that, what was he - a Hindu, a Zoroastrian, both, neither? Didn't we need to impart to him a sense of identity, a sense of belonging? Was it not our duty as parents to let him know where we were from, to give him a religious backdrop to his life?

The problem, though, was that neither my husband nor I had any clear definition of what it means to be a Hindu or a Zoroastrian. Beyond knowing that one of us was born a Hindu and the other a Zoroastrian, we had little knowledge of what that meant, and we had never felt any need to know more.

Now, I considered joining a Hindu group, or visiting the Hindu Temple. I urged my husband to join the Zoroastrian Association of the Greater New York Area. I read books and articles on the Zoroastrian faith and acquainted myself with Hindu practices.

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