The 10 Commitments of Self-Love

I shall lovingly accept myself as I am right now.

This doesn’t mean you have to like everything about yourself. I love and accept my body as it is right now but would still like to drop a few pounds to feel healthier and have my clothes fit better. But self-love means accepting yourself right now, in your own imperfect skin! Then you can lovingly work on things you can change, like improving your health and fitness because that’s good for you. Waiting until you lose the weight or tone your body or make more money is NOT loving! You can love yourself at any weight, in any shape and with all your perceived imperfections! You love your friends and family with their imperfections, don’t you? Give yourself this loving gift!

I shall not criticize myself.

Is your inner dialogue harsh or kind? It’s common to be more critical of your imperfections than you’d be with a friend’s. You know it’s wrong to hurt someone you care about. Apply that to self! Treat yourself as you would a friend—use kind words and accept imperfections. Stop calling yourself names like fat or stupid. You reassure those you care about. Self-love means cutting yourself slack too! It means accepting that you’re human and humans aren’t perfect. Get into the habit of reassuring yourself instead of having negative self-talk! The more you fall in love with you, the less self-insults. The less you put yourself down, the more you’ll fall in love. It’s great synergy!

I shall be kind to others without sacrificing my own needs.

There’s a big difference between being kind to people and being a people pleaser. The latter isn’t loving. You can help people when you can but always make sure that your needs are met first. Self-love requires setting boundaries on what you can give to others. It means doing favors selectively, to people you want to help because you care about them, not to buy approval. When you love yourself, self-approval is the main goal. It’s not loving to help people at your expense. Set boundaries but always have a kind attitude to other people. Helping others is a loving act but take care of you too!