Starting Over After a Catastrophic Loss
page Recovering your life
Truth 8: You must plug in to a second chapter as soon as you exit the first one. I know it may be hard to believe right now, but grief can open the door to an amazing new life. You can start over again, no matter how devastating an experience you’ve gone through. Even when we try to plug in to life with just a few small steps, we can easily become frustrated and angry about this unwanted transition from old life to new. When life is overtaken by grief, everything we do feels harder, slower, and more painful than normal. The brain is telling us to be afraid. It says, “What if I get hurt again?”The heart isn’t ready to love again, or to let go of the pain of the loss. It says, “I don’t want to love anyone else.”Grief says, “The situation is hopeless.” But the situation isn’t hopeless. It’s just hard. Even if it seems daunting right now, spending 5 percent of your day experiencing life in ways that are compelling to you is the minimal amount of time you should consider spending. Connecting with life again is a priority in order to counterbalance the negative reactions you have to your loss with joy and other positive emotions.
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