Three Quick Ways to Find Peace and Happiness

If you find yourself making the same sort of mistakes over and over again, here are some tools you can use to start finding your way out of that cycle once and for all.

As we have talked about many times before, most of the pain that we experience in the present is rooted in our own unresolved issues, baggage, and traumas from the past. And Life, being the greatest school that there is, will continue sending us the same lessons over and over again until we learn them. So, if you find yourself making the same sort of mistakes over and over again: The same bad relationships, bad jobs, or general unhappiness, here are some tools you can use to start finding your way out of that cycle once and for all.

Tool #1: Forgiveness.

Really, this all boils down to forgiveness: Forgiving them for whatever they did or didn’t do, and forgiving yourself for what you did or didn’t do. Now remember, when we say forgiveness, it doesn’t mean that whatever they did or didn’t do is OK…maybe it wasn’t OK at all. But, it’s done, and in the past. My favorite quote on forgiveness comes from The Buddha: ‘Holding on to anger with the intent of hurting someone else, is like picking up a hot coal with the intention of throwing it: You are the one who gets burned.’Of course, forgiveness can be very difficult to manage; if it was easy, you’d have done it already! The first thing to figure out is who it is that needs forgiving (and don’t forget to put yourself on that list!). The biggest clue is to see how you are feeling now, and think back to the earliest memory you have of feeling that way. Who was there? What was happening? It may seem like something simple, but you’d be amazed by what things stick with us. If it’s a particularly painful memory, I have recorded something called a ‘swish pattern’ that you can use to heal painful memories, sometimes instantly.

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Tool #2: Writing it out.

Often times, it’s not possible to tell the person that we forgive them. It may not be possible to talk to them for one reason or another, up to and including them having transitioned to the next world. And, quite often the other person may not want your forgiveness, if they don’t think they did anything wrong! Luckily enough, that doesn’t matter, since forgiveness is something you do for you; it’s a gift you give *yourself*. Remember, the goal is not validating their choices, but releasing your lingering negativity towards them. Since good, bad, or indifferent, they did their best; in the end, they were the product of THEIR own unresolved baggage, issues, and trauma from the past!

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B. Dave Walters
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Related Topics: Faiths, Peace, Happiness

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