The Ladybug on My Shoulder

A message from God helped me see that I am never alone.

BY: Stephanie Spencer

 
My 8-month-old daughter, Madison, died three years ago on January 29, after a three-day illness. After she died, I had a hard time remembering anything before her terrible last three days. One memory that did stand out was of her first Christmas.

I had dressed her in a red "My First Christmas" outfit with little black patent leather shoes. I remembered how her big brown eyes shone so brightly. Her smile was so big, I could see her new teeth coming in. She was so full of life.

At that moment, as I was living in the memory, I thought about how much she reminded me of a ladybug, a cute-as-a-button ladybug. From then on I started collecting ladybug crafts.

Last year, during another time of sorrow and pain, one special moment changed everything and uplifted my broken spirit. My loving grandmother passed away. My whole family came from all over for her funeral. We gathered, reminiscing about all the good times we had with her. In spite of all the family around, inside I was hurting and felt alone.

Before the funeral, I went for a walk, hoping to have some alone time with God and say a prayer. "God help me, give me strength..."

As I was walking, I looked down and something caught my eye. On my shoulder was a red ladybug.

I knew without a doubt I wasn't alone. Had it been anything other than a ladybug, I might have missed it, but God knows how important ladybugs are to me. God was there with me, and my daughter was too.

This is just one example among thousands of God's grace, love, and faithfulness. He is always with us, answering our prayers, and sometimes, when we need him the most, he's right there where we can see him--even in a shape of a little red ladybug.

After seeing the ladybug on my shoulder and knowing my prayer about needing His help had been answered, I said, "Thank You for walking with me, being with me, and getting me through this."

Although my grandmother's funeral was hard, it wasn't as hard as it would have been if I didn't have God right there holding my hand. Life without my daughter isn't as hard as it could be because I know where she is and who is with her.

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