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American-Yiddish Dictionary

JEWBILATION - Pride in finding out that one's favorite celebrity is Jewish.

TORAHFIED - Inability to remember one's lines at one's Bar or Bat mitzvah.

CHUTZPAPA - A father who wakes his wife at 4:00 AM so she can change the baby's diaper.

DISORIYENTA - When Aunt Sadie gets lost in a department store and strikes up a conversation with everyone she passes.

MISHPOCHAMARKS - The assorted lipstick and make-up stains found on one's face and collar after kissing all one's aunts and cousins at a reception.

ROSH HASHANANA - A rock 'n roll band from Brooklyn.

FEELAWFUL - Indigestion from eating Israeli street food.

KINDERSCHLEP - To transport other kids in your car besides yours.

OYVAYSMEAR - What one says when the cream cheese squeezes out of the bagel and falls on your clean pants.

JEWDO - A traditional form of self-defense based on talking one's way out of a tight spot.

BAD JOKE DISCLAIMER: We recognize that religious humor can be risky. It is our hope that by laughing at ourselves (and others) we can make this subject more approachable. If you find any of these objectionable, we apologize. As with most jokes, the original authors are unknown - but we thank them.

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